Chapter 439

The Deaf Italian Bookkeeper...

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $10,000,000.00

His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing so he would not have to testify in court. When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about his missing $10 million, he takes along his lawyer who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where the money is!"

The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido, Where's the money?

Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about."

The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about." The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's head and says, "Ask him again or I'll kill him!"

The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him."

Guido trembles and signs, "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house.

The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"

The lawyer replies, "He says fuck you, you don't have the balls to pull the trigger."

Don't you just love lawyers?

This little ditty is compliments of GEORGE

Why did the blonde take her laptop computer on her date.

It was an internet date.

This is health note from George, which I believe is worthy of passing on ... It may help someone.

This is not a joke, but hopefully might save some ones life. We've all heard that taking an aspirin if you think you might be having a heart attack could save your life, however did you know that nearly all aspirin these days are coated to help prevent the stomach pain and bleeding some people experience.

Did you know coated aspirin can take up to FOUR HOURS to dissolve?

IF YOU DON'T HAVE UNCOATED ASPIRIN (THEY ARE GETTING HARD TO FIND) CHEW ONE UP IN YOUR MOUTH!

TASTES HORRIBLE BUT GETS IN YOUR SYSTEM MUCH FASTER AND JUST MIGHT SAVE YOUR LIFE.