Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 316
This compliments of Budhah
It is a response about the chicken joke from yesterday's submission; Enjoy his personal experience
Love the Chicken joke. The next really happened, and figured you might accidentally fit it in somewhere.
My wife is from the Philippines, and when she came over to marry me in 1989, we would always go out to eat from Sunday dinner after going to the local
Newman Center for services ... She had been here for about 6 weeks, and i asked her where she wanted to go ... She told me Kentucky, My nephew called me on the phone before we got out of the house ... and asked what we were up to, as he also married a
Filipina ... Told him we were going to Paducha
Kentucky, which is about a 90 min drive, from our town in Southern Illinois. Asked why and told him
"hell if I know, but first time she asked to go anywhere, since coming over from Manila." About half way there wife and i were talking and she asked why we were not going to KFC,, I told her she asked to go to "Kentucky" and she responded and told me that in the Philippines, they call
KFC, Kentucky...
The body builder takes off his shirt
And the blonde says,
"What a Great chest you have!'
He tells her,
'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby.'
He takes off his pants and the blonde says, '
"What massive calves you have!'
The body builder tells her,
'That's 100 lbs. Of dynamite, Baby.'
He then removes his underwear and
The blonde goes running out of the
Apartment screaming in fear.
The body builder puts his clothes
Back on and chases after her.
He catches up to her and asks why
She ran out of the apartment like that.
The blonde replies,
'I was afraid to be around all that dynamite
After I saw how short the fuse was!'
One day a young woman had just started playing her round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for help and to complain. Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, 'Why are you back in so early? What's wrong?' 'I was stung by a bee', she said. 'Where?', he asked. 'Between the first and second hole', she replied.
He nodded knowingly and said... 'Then your feet were too far apart.'
One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart.
Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out,
"Are you okay, what's your name?"
"It's Jack, and I'm Okay thanks," I replied.
"Jack, forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while, and I'll help you get the cart up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, but I don't think my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on," Elizabeth insisted. She was very pretty, very sexy and persuasive ... I was weak. "Well okay," I finally agreed, and added, "but my wife. won't like it."
After a restorative brandy, and some creative putting lessons, I thanked my host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife is going to be. really upset."
"Don't be silly!" Elizabeth said with a smile, "She won't know anything.
By the way, where is she?"
"Under the cart!" I said...
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