Chapter 251

This one is compliments of elo

An Indian chief lived together with his tribe on a reservation.

One year the previous winter had been very harsh and the tribe had been freezing as they still used firewood in their houses. As fall came the tribe asked the chief if he thought it was going to be another cold winter.

Not really sure what to answer the chief told the tribe to gather some extra firewood just in case.

After the chief thought it would be prudent to check with the local meteorologist. He called and asked if it was going to be a cold winter. "Well - it's probably going to be another cold winter" was the reply. Congratulating, himself having already asked for extra wood gathering, the chief told his tribe to go and gather even more firewood.

The day after the chief called the weather man again for confirmation. "Now we're sure it's going to be a cold winter" was the reply. The chief told his tribe to gather all the firewood they possibly could.

just to be sure the chief called the weather station the next day. "Are you QUITE sure it's going to be a cold winter?"

"We're damn sure" was the reply. "The Indians are gathering firewood like crazy!!!"

This short one is compliments of Argon

Why is American beer like having sex on the beach?
It's fucking close to water.

This one is compliments of john

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human Beings are the only animals that stutter', she says.

A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered', she volunteered.

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'

'That must have been scary', said the teacher.

'It sure was', said the little girl. 'My kitty raised his back, went 'Ffff Fffff, Fffff, Fffff' ... And before he could say 'Fuck Off', the Rottweiler ate him!

The teacher wet her pants laughing.