Jokes and Giggles
Copyright© 2015 by Jack Spratt
Chapter 105
These are compliments of Igor:
What's the definition of an intellectual?
An intellectual is someone that can hear the 'William Tell Overture' without thinking of The Lone Ranger.
Love is in the air...
"What would you like for dinner, my love? Chicken, Beef or Lamb?"
I said, "Thank you, dear, I think I'll have chicken."
She replied, "You're having soup, asshole. I was talking to the cat."
This one is compliments of tediebaere
A penguin was driving along a highway in the mid west of the USA, when all of a sudden he noticed smoke coming out from under the hood of his car.
Hoping he is able to make it to a service station he keeps going. About 10 minuets later he pulls into a full service service station with black smoke billowing out from under his hood. The mechanic seeing his predicament tells him to pull on in to the service bay.
Telling the penguin that it will be a bit before he is able to diagnose the problem the mechanic tells the penguin to have a seat in the waiting area. The penguin not wanting to wait around in the hot room, walks around town to see what he can find. A few minuets later he sees an ice cream shop and decides that an ice cream cone sounds like a great way to deal with the heat. Walking on in he tells the man behind the counter that he wants a double scoop of vanilla on a waffle cone.
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