Chapter 6: Woman's Right to Change Her Mind

February 12th - February 20th, 1989

I had promised my mom I would spend that Sunday with her and Richie, and despite the fact that I wanted to spend every minute of it with Jennifer, I did actually enjoy some parts of the day.

Richie was christened that morning for one thing, and I was made his Godfather which meant I held him while they made his fussy mood worse by sprinkling the holy water on him and making him outright cry.

Oh, I shouldn’t really complain, though. I was happy to do it, especially since I didn’t have a Godfather or Godmother. At the time I was christened, it was only my mom and me.

My dad didn’t attend because ... I guess you could say because of religious reasons. He didn’t believe in God, Jesus, the church, or any of it, so while he didn’t necessarily object to the christening, he didn’t want anything to do with it either.

After the ceremony, I got to enjoy my mother’s breast milk for what I thought would be the last time, for Richie was seven months old and it was time to wean him. My dad was actually more upset about that than the christening, and I guess I could see his point for the only reason mom gave was the baby book said it was time. But this was my mom’s decision and I knew better than to interfere. It was her body, and I know she wanted to start getting it back to normal again.

Around three in the afternoon, however, my plans for the day were diverted when Jennifer called.

“What’s wrong?”

“I saw them again. Flying around my head.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes.”

“What did you do? Did your dad or Lee see you?”

“No, Lee isn’t here, and when I felt it starting, I just went to my room. I was a little scared, but I didn’t freak like last night. Tim? Am I going to keep having these?”

“I don’t know, Sweetie. Maybe they’ll go away, or maybe you’ll have one big one and then you’ll see them all the time like me. But it’s nothing to be afraid of. Once you get used to them, you can just kind of tune them out of your awareness again. It’s just like how you don’t really listen to the birds when you go outside, you know? You know they are there, but they don’t distract you from other things.”

She sighed, then said, “Tell me about them? I mean, why do we have them flying around our heads?”

“I don’t know why. I just know that they ... well, they don’t just fly around our heads, but in our heads, through our bodies, and even pass through the space between two people. When you move a finger, your hand, even beat your heart, there’s a symbol which breaks off from the streams of symbols in your mind and travels down to the thing you’re controlling.”

“So the symbols. They’re just part of our nervous system? But you said they also can go from one person to another.”

“They do. You see, that’s where telepathy comes in. Normally the symbols can only travel through our nerves, but telepaths are able to break them away from our nervous system and insert them into the nervous system of another person. I think telepathy really has two different parts to it. You like have a telepathic eye and a telepathic, uh, mouth. You use your eye to locate and read a person’s feelings and thoughts, and you use the mouth to transmit the symbols. For example, it allows you to make them call up memories and stuff that you couldn’t access unless they happened to think of them on their own. Does all that make sense?”

“I think so. So all telepaths can see them and use them?”

“You mean the symbols?”

“Yes.”

“Jennifer, other than you and me, I only know of one other person who can see the symbols, and her name is Young Lee. That’s not really her name, but I forget her real name at the moment.”

“Now, I don’t understand. I thought you said telepaths use these symbols to make people do what they want.”

“They do. They just don’t see the symbols, that’s all. I didn’t even see them myself until about a year ago. Or at least I didn’t see them like I do now. Joey and I had to feel them out to draw them. We never actually saw them back then.”

“I still don’t understand. If others don’t see them, then how do they use them?”

“Think of it this way. We have been using them in our own bodies all our lives without knowing it. We don’t have to see them to use them, or even know anything about them.”

“Oh. You mean it’s just like not knowing how a muscle or our stomach works yet still being able to move and digest food.” Jennifer sighed and asked, “So how come we can and others can’t?”

“Good question. Maybe we like have like a telepathic ear or something that we can hear the symbols all around us.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

After a pause, she said, “Tim? I can’t stop thinking about those drawings. Half of me wants to never see them again, but the other half...”

“Well, that’ll be up to you. I don’t know this for sure, but ... Well, like you said. It all seemed to start after you looked at the drawings we made. Looking at more of them might just make you break out completely.”

“Break out?”

“That’s when a person’s telepathic abilities start working and they have to figure out how to control them. Luckily, I had my mom to help me, and I think it’s during that time that determines a lot about how a telepath will turn out. Uh, I don’t want to scare you or anything, but a lot of telepaths go crazy after a while. Especially if they are just left to themselves without anyone else limiting their use of their abilities. But I won’t let that happen to you.”

“I know. Oh, I REALLY don’t want them now. I don’t want to see those drawing anymore.”

“I miss you.”

“I miss you too. I wish we could just go to the mall or something together.”

“Yeah, but since my mom moved out, I don’t get to see her that much anymore, and I promised her...”

“Well, why don’t you see if she’d like to go to the mall too?”

“Hey, now that’s a good idea. Yeah. Okay. Just a sec, and I’ll ask her ... Yeah, she’d like that. She says she’d like to buy you something that she saw last week and thought you’d like and look good in. Uh, and she says...”

“She’s telling you all this? Or...”

“She’s thinking it to me. She says your sister and dad could come too because she’d like to meet them.”

“Should I ask my dad?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. But I don’t think Lee will be back until tonight,” she said before putting down the phone.

A couple minutes later, Mr. Corrigan’s voice said, “Hello, Tim?”.

“Yeah, Mr. C?”

“Tell your mom we’ll be taking you all out for dinner after the mall. Sound good to you?”

Sure. Sounds great. Do you want to meet us there? Or we could come by in a limo?”

“Hmm ... Shhh,” he said to Jennifer. “He wants to know if we want to go in a limousine.”

She cried, “YES, we do!”

He asked me, “Did you hear that?”

“I think your neighbors heard that too. We’ll pick you guys up around four, okay?”

“That’s fine. It will probably be just Jennifer and me.”

“I know.”

“Okay. Well, here’s Jennifer again,” he announced, then a moment later in the background, I heard him say, “Ouch! Careful, Pumpkin. Next time wait until I let go of the phone before you grab it away.”

“Sorry, Daddy ... Tim? You still there?”

“Nope. I hung up.”

“Ha, ha. Well, I can’t wait for you to get here.”

“Me neither. I love you.”

“I love you too. Bye.”

“Bye.”

Not even ten minutes went by before she called back and asked, “Would it be okay if Sandi and Brad came with us? Sandi called me up a few minutes ago, and their mom and dad had to go to a wedding and were bored.”

“I guess. I mean, as long as your dad’s okay with it.”

“Brad says he’ll pay for theirs, and my dad said he didn’t care. If you don’t want them to go...”

“No. That’s cool. Brad is my friend, you know. I don’t have any problems with it. I trust you.”

“I trust you too,” she said softly. “I’ll see you in a little while, k?”

“Uh, wait. Are Brad and Sandi going to meet us? Or are we picking them up?”

“They’re already here, but they said they can go in their car if there isn’t’ enough room.”

“Already there? I thought you said Sandi called?”

“Oh, um. Well? I didn’t want you to get upset if you knew they had come over on their own. I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay, but don’t do that, okay? I’m not really the jealous type, and I’d rather always be able to believe everything you say, you know?”

“Okay. I’m sorry. I won’t lie to you again.” she said miserably.

“Jennifer?”

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

She sighed, then said, “I love YOU.”

“And I love you. If I’m going to get out of here, I need to get off the phone, okay?”

“Okay. But I love you anyway [click].”

I turned off the phone with a smile on my face, then set the phone down and took a couple of careful sniffs while my smile changed to a frown.

“Shit, Richie,” I said, holding him up off my lap to confirm he had soiled himself again. “Why didn’t you tell me you had to go before I put your clothes on!”

I turned him around to face me as I got up, then couldn’t help but grin at the way his face lit up in a smile when he saw me.

“You know, if I didn’t know better, I’d swear you were empathic. You’re not, are you?” I said in a giggly voice while shaking him gently to make him laugh with delight.

“Bbbbbba” he said in response.

“You can say that again, bro,” I sighed as I sat him down on the changing table and started undoing his snaps.

“Earrrraaa?” he cooed while I pulled his pants off.

“Yeah ... You like those bunnies, don’t you?” I said when I found his attention being temporarily held by the stuffed bunnies on the shelves next to the table.

“Ggggbbbbblllllaaa,” he said bubbly.”

“Shit, Richie. My shit doesn’t smell this bad after I drink mom’s milk. Pwew!”

My mom said, walking in the nursery, “It did when you were his age. Oh, honey. I said the red pants, not the jeans.”

“Mom! We’re going to the mall. Nobody in their right mind goes to the mall in red corduroy pants. That’s like not cool.”

“Okay then. You get to change him in the restaurant. The red pants slip right off and on. I always have to fight him to get those...”

She stopped as Richie planted his feet on the mat and lifted his butt for me as I slid the new diaper underneath him, then once I had finished powdering him, I sealed his diaper and waited as he reached down with his little baby hands and started pulling his own pants up.

“That’s a lot better this time, Richie. Here, let me help you get them up over your diaper ... There. I know, I know. You can’t get the zipper or snap. That’s okay. We’ll work on that when your fingers are stronger for that kind of thing.”

My mom exclaimed, “How did you get him to do all that?!”

I looked over my shoulder at her with a smile as I picked up my baby brother, then turned, kissed his forehead and said, “Big brothers are supposed to teach little brothers things like that, right Richie?”

“Ahchheeheheh” he giggled while reaching out to my mom.

“Come ‘ere my little precious,” my mom said sweetly as she took him from my arms. “Daddy has a nice big bowl of oatmeal and a jar of carrots ready for you.”

“Ehemnahhwana...” he said from her shoulder, looking at me as they walked out.

“Yeah, after you eat, we can play again,” I said, assuming that’s what he had meant from the images I read from his developing mind.

I went and got ready myself. After taking a shower, out of pure curiosity, I ran back to the nursery and powered my butt like I had Richie’s. I found my boxers slipped on without any friction.

My dad was taking his shot at feeding Richie when I got to the dining room, and I watched his antics with great interest until Richie had had enough and promptly sent his bowl flying.

“Dang, Richie,” I said as my dad wiped the oatmeal off his left leg. “You’re supposed to spit it back out when you’re full, not throw it across the room.”

“He’s too smart for that now,” my dad said. “He’s learned that I just poke it back in his mouth if he spits it out. So instead, he cuts off the supply at its source. Don’t you, my bright little boy?”

“Oh, honey,” my mom exclaimed as she walked in. “Did your daddy try to overfeed you again?”

“Well, we wouldn’t have to feed him this slop at all if his mother would let him get all the good stuff like he wants.”

“Now don’t start that again,” my mom warned sternly. “Tim, I take it you’re ready?”

“Yes, but I don’t think Richie is,” I said, taking the cloth and cleaning up his mouth. “Aw, man? He has oatmeal on his jeans and everything!”

“Welcome to the life of a parent, Timothy,” my dad chuckled.

By the time we got him cleaned up enough to leave, it was already ten till four, so I called Jennifer’s house from the limo to tell them we would be a little late.

“Lee’s going to come too,” Jennifer said after I told her the news. “Is your dad coming?”

“No. He’s got to take care of ... uh ... rewarding some of the staff for the week’s work. So how come Lee came home early?”

“She said she just felt like it. She even sent Brian home without him coming in. Oh, and Brad’s acting a little strange.”

“Strange? How? In what way?”

“You’ll see when you get here. Oh, hi, Brad. You want to talk to Tim?”

“Uh. Hello? Tim?”

“Hi, Brad,” I said, reaching out to his mind and locking on to it. “You guys were bored, huh?”

“Yeah, pretty bored,” he lied. “Sandi asked if I could drop her off at Jennifer’s and when I heard you guys were going out to eat...”

I stopped listening to his words while I examined what had really happened. It was his idea to go over to Jennifer’s, and that had been instead of them having sex like they usually did when their parents were gone.

“Helloooo ... Yo, Earth to Tim. Wake up, man.”

“Sorry, Brad. My brother was about to slobber on my shirt. Anyway, I’ll see you in about thirty minutes. Later. Bye.”

I knew Jennifer would be upset that I hadn’t talked to her before hanging up, but I needed to think and talk to my mom about Brad and the things I had found in his head.

When we got there, I played it cool for the time being, for I didn’t want to say anything in front of everyone, nor did I want to spoil the evening with what I had discovered.

Brad spent the entire evening trying to get Jennifer’s attention in one way or another, absolutely ignoring his sister which was so unlike him Sandi was getting pretty worried.

Jennifer, on the other hand, was loving every moment, yet didn’t give him any recognition or satisfaction for anything he did. She stuck very close to me, sometimes playing it up with me just to tease Brad. Between this and Sandi’s growing concern, I finally decided enough was enough. While we ate dinner, I undid the commands Jennifer unconsciously had given him.

I did it in such a way that it appeared that Brad had given up and simply decided he liked his sister better anyway. Other than Jennifer’s disappointment, we finished the meal without any further problems.

We were just leaving the restaurant to head home when I caught Jennifer wondering why Brad had stopped while the symbols jumped from her mind and into his.

I immediately sent the counter commands, so Brad only had a moment of confusion before he went back to listening to Sandi and Lee talk about guys.

Two minutes later, I had to do it again, and almost immediately a third time.

I sighed as everyone but Jennifer, my mom, my brother, and I sagged their heads forward asleep.

“Hey! What’s going on?” Jennifer exclaimed as my mom probed Mr. Corrigan to determine what I had done.

“I’m sorry, Jennifer. I had to do it. It looks like you’re breaking out whether you want to or not.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know how Brad was acting strange?”

“Yes?” she said meekly, feeling a little guilty for enjoying it like she had.

“Well, you sort of...”

“You mean I ... But I didn’t! I swear!”

“Honey,” my mom said gently. “We know you didn’t do it on purpose. Tim went through something very similar when he was ... what did you call it?”

“Breaking out, Mom. When I was at Crow, I read a book from the library about telepathy, and that’s what they called it. The book wasn’t really very accurate, but it was interesting to read anyway.”

“How do you know I did it?” Jennifer asked in a defensive tone. “Maybe you did it without knowing it.”

“Jennifer, I put everyone to sleep after watching you alter Brad’s mind to make him want you three times. Do you understand? I saw you do it.”

“But ... But I didn’t ... I never wanted...” she said while covering her nose and mouth with her right hand in shock and distress.

My mom said in a comforting tone, “We know you didn’t, dear. You haven’t done him or anyone else any harm, and there is a simple way of preventing yourself from unknowingly using your abilities like this again.”

“There is? How?” she said, near to tears.

My mom looked at me, so I sighed, took Jennifer’s hands in mine, then looked deeply into her eyes with my empathic support on full and said, “By learning how to consciously control them. That’s the only way, Jennifer. I’m sorry.”

“No,” she whimpered. “I don’t want them. I don’t want to hurt people. I don’t want to make people different.”

“Then don’t. Learning how to control your abilities doesn’t make you a bad person. Once you have control of them, you can choose never to use them. Okay? Think of it as ... as learning how to swim.”

“Swim?”

“Yes. If you don’t know how to swim, you might drown if you get plopped into a deep body of water. Once you know how to swim, you don’t have to go to the pool ever again, but most people think it’s a lot of fun and go swimming whenever they can. You know what I mean?”

“I guess,” she said sadly, but not anywhere near as upset as before.

My mom said, “Timmy mentioned to me you didn’t want your sister to know about it, but you were going to tell your father?”

“Yes,” Jennifer said, looking up at him.

I asked gently, “Do you want to do it now?”

“I don’t know,” she said unhappily. “Can’t you just teach me how to control it without me having to tell him? All I want to do is keep myself from using it accidentally, and if I’m not going to use it on purpose either, it would be just as if I didn’t have them at all.”

“Jennifer, I think you better tell him because ... Well, what if he finds out later? Don’t you think it would be better if he knew at the beginning?”

“I guess you’re right. But not Lee. Oh Tim. Check her, please? I might have done something. Oh and Daddy. Ohhhh...” she whined with a very unhappy expression.

When I glanced over at my mom for help, my mom said, “I’ll do her father.”

“Okay,” I said as I entered Lee’s sleeping mind and started feeling around.

My mom announced a minute later, “There doesn’t appear to be anything wrong with your father.”

Jennifer asked, “Tim? What about Lee?”

“What? Oh. Uh ... Sorry. You had her come home and want to go out with us.”

She exclaimed, “Ohhh! Anything else?!”

“Well ... Now I don’t want you to get upset about this because I’m sure it’s very innocent...”

“What?” Jennifer said, her eyes getting wide in preparation for the shock she was expecting.

“Like, have you ever wondered what your sister’s body looks like close up?”

“Why?”

“Because for some reason, you made her want to show it to you.”

“You mean without clothes on?”

“Yep,” I said, commanding my woody to go down from the images Lee had of herself posing nude in front of a mirror.

She didn’t answer, so I closed my connection with Lee’s mind and refocused myself on Jennifer’s.

“Jennifer, it isn’t wrong for you to wonder about things like that. She’s your sister, right? So you know that there is a very good chance you’ll look a lot like her when you get to be her age.”

“I know. And that is pretty much the reason I...”

I gave her a few moments to continue her sentence, then said, “Jennifer, you can tell me and my mom anything, you know that, don’t you?”

After having carefully laid the sleeping Richie down in his car bed, my mom sat down beside Jennifer and said, “Whatever you have done or will do in the future, you can always talk to us about it without feeling bad about it. Nothing you do or say could possibly make us think any less of you.”

I said, “We’ve been through what you’re going through. And you’re not going to do anything as near as ... embarrassing as we have, so just let it out and get it off your chest, okay?”

She let out a deep breath that she had been holding in, then said, “Lee, she’s ... I guess I sometimes wish I could be like her.”

“You mean...” I said, feeling the desire within her rise a little more.

“I mean, I wish I had a body like hers, and use it like she does. But she isn’t what I want to be, and it makes me feel really bad that I sometimes feel that way.”

“Jennifer,” my mom said in a tone of voice that meant she was going to talk a while. “When I was your age, my mother used to tell me that boys only liked me for my looks and not for what I was inside. I didn’t believe her, and when I let a boy I had been seeing for a couple of months take my virginity, I spent several months trying to understand why I felt so guilty and upset about it. My mother died when I was seventeen, and it wasn’t until then that I figured it out and knew my mother had been right. I had sex with most of the boys I went to high school believing they were interested in me just as much as my body.

“Lee hasn’t figured that out yet, but she will someday, on her own. Yes, she is very attractive, and I’m sure she enjoys the sex she has, just like I did. But, looking sexy on the outside, and having a lot of sex doesn’t make you sexy on the inside. And that’s what really matters to a person. That’s the only way you can feel good about yourself and the sex you have. So don’t think Lee is happier than you are because she gets all the attention she wants from the boys and men around her. She’d trade it all in to have just one chance at what you and Tim have now.”

“Really?” Jennifer asked, looking at me for confirmation.

I said, “Lee is sort of in awe of you. The whole time we were eating, she kept kicking herself at how you were ignoring Brad’s obvious attempts at impressing you while you kept me occupied. She really thinks you’re something else, Jennifer. I think she’d do just about anything for you if you asked because she’s pretty proud of you.”

“Wow ... Really?” Jennifer said, looking at Lee happily.

“Yep.”

We gave her a few minutes to think things over, but when I realized we were practically at her house already, I said, “I’m going to have to wake them up now, so I guess you’ll just have to tell your dad on your own sometime.”

“I’ll tell them after everyone leaves,” she said confidently. “I promise.”

I asked, surprised, “You’re going to tell Lee too?”

“I’ve never kept anything from her before, and I’m not going to start now.”

Then Jennifer put her arms around me for a hug and said, “Thank you.”

“Thank you both,” she said a moment later to my mom from over my shoulder.

My mom said, “You’re welcome, dear. Just try and be happy with what you have, and don’t let yourself wish for things you can’t get the normal way. I think you’ll be okay if you did that.”

After waking everyone up without anyone realizing they had been asleep, we said our goodnights and thanked them for dinner. As soon as we were on our way home, my mom and I took off our clothes and stripped Richie while he cried for having been woken up by our goodbyes, then the three of us curled up together intending to snuggle for a while.

“Timmy? Do you think I’m being selfish in wanting to wean Richie?”

“Selfish? No, Mom. You’re not being selfish. I mean, if the book says six or seven months, then there probably is a reason.”

“I know. And I really would like to be able to not worry about them getting sore or ... Well, I’m just tired of all the inconveniences.”

“But?” I said, getting up on my elbow as she positioned the still squawking Richie at his favorite breast.

“But I know I’ll never have another child, and...” she said, tearing up a little.

“What, Mom?”

She smiled at me while blinking the tears out of her eyes.

“I actually like the feeling I get while my sons are nursing from me.”

“Sons?”

“I know I’ll miss the bond I feel with him while he’s nursing, especially when he starts discovering there’s more to life than spending it with his mother.”

“Sons?” I repeated, not daring to move anywhere near her breast before I had her permission.

She smiled at me again and nodded, so after a kiss on the cheek, I slid down to get comfortable and joined my happy gurgling brother in nursing at our mother’s teats.

She said a few minutes later, “You know what the only problem with this is?”

“Yeah,” I said, pausing to swallow. “This means Dad gets his way after all. Stop kicking, Richie. She’s my mother too!” I said before he got me in his left cheek with his right hand.

“Mom! Richie’s not sharing!”

“Here we go,” my mom sighed, rolling her eyes up and shaking her head. “I knew it was too good to be true.”

“Good morning,” I said the next morning as Jennifer opened the door and got in. “What’s the plan for today?”

“You tell me,” she said sweetly as she bent forward and gave me a kiss on the lips. “You’re the teacher, I’m just the student.”

“So, you’re feeling better about it all?” I asked, noticing Lee’s smiling face from the window.

“I told them everything. And I mean everything. Things I haven’t even told you about yet. My dad was surprised and a little uncomfortable about some of the really private stuff, but Lee ... She came into my room after we had gone to bed and we talked about girl stuff for hours. She understood everything I was feeling and I guess I’m just happy to know I’m not any worse than anyone else is.”

I pulled off the road so I could look at her without worrying about hitting something and said, “Um, Jennifer? I’m confused. I mean, I’m happy you told me all that, and I’m glad you’re feeling good about your sexual self, but...”

“What does it have to do with my telepathy?” she said, smiling and keeping herself looking straight ahead.

“Yeah, basically.”

“Ever since I started Jr. High, I’ve watched my sister have sex with boys before Mom came home from work. I knew if Mom ever found out about Lee, she’d kill her, but I was more afraid about Mom finding out that I watched Lee doing it.”

“You mean, you were afraid that your mom would find out you liked watching Lee doing it.”

“Yes. I ... I used to touch myself whenever I watched them, but then Mom caught her one day, and she almost caught me too. I’ve never been so scared in my life, Tim. I swore I’d never have another thought about it, or ever touch myself like that again. I’ve been so good about it too. And Mom made it easier for me by spending more time with me. I guess what I was afraid of the most with this telepathy stuff was not being able to resist making others do those things instead of doing it myself. That’s what Lee and I talked about last night. I didn’t tell her about watching her with her boyfriends, but I told her everything else.”

“Are you’re still worried about corrupting her somehow?”

“No. Now that I know she’s much more perverted than I am, I’m not going to worry about me making her worse than she is now.”

“What about your dad? How did he take it all?”

“He had me promise never to do anything to him or Lee without their permission, but beyond that, he said he trusted me - and you - that I wouldn’t do anything without having a good reason and thinking it through. I think he got that out of some parenting handbook because it sounded rehearsed or something.”

“So everyone is cool with it? Including you?”

Jennifer finally turned her head to face me and said with enthusiasm, “I think I want to do it now. I mean, I think I’m going to like it once I understand it, and I’m not afraid of hurting anyone anymore. I also know you’ve wanted me to do it from the start, and I’m starting to see why.”

“Really? You mean, once you get the hang of it, you won’t just hang it up?”

“I’ve thought about it a lot last night. Actually, I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now. I think as long as I never force people to do something I’ll be okay. If I ever do, then I’ll know I’ve gone too far and I’ll have to figure out some kind of punishment or something for myself to keep me from doing it again. But I won’t, I know I won’t, so I guess ... Yes. I won’t hang it up later. Unless you think I should?”

“No way! Oh, Jennifer ... You know what this means? I mean, you, me ... Oh, Sweetie. This is like the greatest present you could have ever given me!” I exclaimed as I grabbed her and hugged her really hard.