# Have You Seen the Cube, Sir?

## by Paige Turner

#### CopyrightÂ© 2014 by Paige Turner

Humor Story: WARNING! MIND FUCK! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! RUN AWAY!!!

Tags: Mystery

Did you see the Cube, sir?

'Tis a qubit, and what's a cubic cubit?

NOTE: This is a trick, a 'schtick' that can be

explained, but which you won't get at first.

A cubic qubit is made with three sticks, a blob of clay and a mirror. Lay the mirror flat, then looking straight down at the mirror, drop the sticks. They will fall down and there is a blob of clay on the mirror. If you do this one, the trick is to use three knitting needles and they hit the clay and stick. Now you have three sticks in a blob of clay and the trick is to find the cube. You cannot remove the knitting needs from the blob of clay and it all depends upon how you look at this strictly bush league idiot piece of schtick here that has now got you hooked on this idea of 'where to find the cubic Qubit.' You can not remove the needles from the clay, but you can move them around. Stick them in different places, form a right angle, Then lift the one leg while the other leg (knitting needle) is still laying flat on the mirror. Push the third needle into the clay horizontally.

Now do you see the cube? You can get an idea of this being part of a cube, but the more you look at it, nope!

Where is this cube I'm am telling you you should be able to see?

Now, this is a zen koan. Do you see the Cube?

Uh,,, what the fuck?

Yes, I am messing with your head. This is the type of thing I do.

Do you, (or have you, ) see the Cube?

Okay, take the blob of clay in your hand and then put the device so that the blob of clay is at the top and it's standing on its feet like a tripod. Look at the blob of clay. Do you see the cube?

Going to drive you flat out batty isn't it? I just told you how to do a magic trick and you're having to think about it a little bit, aren't you? Now. Do you actually need all that stuff or can you do that kind of trick in your head? Seriously weird thing, ain't it? Would you like to state under oath you have actually seen this trick done? Did you see the cube or not, sir! And 'Bite me your honor' is not the appropriate reply when you're own logic is leading you along by the hand and there you sit, knowing full well that there is no possible way for the judge to know how long it took you to solve it, and whoa! You have to say under oath if you did or did not actually see that Cube, and if (or if) not you actually had to get out the paraphernalia and show the damn judge how that trick is done.

Okay, that is a 'trick of the light.' It's just a stupid thing you can do and everyone you do this trick for is going to go 'oh wow, man, I should have seen that!' and because I told you it was a zen koan, okay; 'Since it's an impossible to solve paradox riddle, then I know I won't solve it, so what's the point?'

Gotcha, ain't I?

Oh, you flat out KNOW you are being conned here, only ... what's the point? Well, saying 'having fun' kind of... 'this guy's getting off on pulling this trick on me, and I'm a bright human being, so I should ... what?' and now we're back to the riddle.

Seriously.

Did you see the Cube?

I know you haven't had time to get the knitting needles, but you can do it with a shiny tray and three straws and a lump of bread holding them together, and as long as the tray is flat on the table and there is enough light, this trick will work. Seriously; did you figure it out without the actual thing being set up, or ... well, grasshopper! Since there isn't any money on the line here, where the hell is the god damn Cube! is either inside your head or something you will have to witness with your own eyes. and that badgering you got up there is pretty much setting you up for the punch line, isn't it?

In chess they refer to a move as a 'crusher.' This is a little intellectual puzzle right here and the reason I'm pretty sure you'll want to say 'bite me' to the judge is that if ... by some odd circumstance of this Universe we live in, you should ever find yourself in the court room having a very surrealistic moment in time, is you will know what the next thing I'm going to ask you for the record is, 'And what was your Time?' Pretty open ended question, but if you have a good answer, already prepared, pick a date in history and that is your answer to the zen koan. Seriously odd answer, one you are delivering in answer to a question by which a court of law is actually about to have a bit of hilariousity (if there is such a word) and this 'set up' here leads down a path in cosmology having to do with tau axial reflections. You see half of the cube sticking out of that blob of clay, but you do NOT see the cube. Or have you already seen the cube inside your own mind? In any case, this little logic puzzle is solvable. Mentally and/or physically.

And when the judge asks, knowing that you are under oath, yes or no? Your honor, I did or did not see the Cube. You can swear on an stack of bibles, there was no physical cube present. That is a true statement of fact. There never was any physical cubical object present at any time in this Universe that you can make out of those materials, period. You can break the long sticks up and divvy up the blob and put together a Cubical Object, but that is more than the three sticks and the blob being the connection of the three straight sticks all at 90 degrees angles to each other and it's not a puzzle that you can just walk away from and forget. It's a solid paradox, yet if you tell the judge, 'Yes, your honor, I Did see the Cube.'

'Was this a physical object made up of twelve equally long sticks or straight pieces?'

'No, sir, it was not.'

'Oh? And how was this cube different from the dictionary's very clear and well defined description?'

'It all depends upon how you look at it, I guess, but since you all wanted to know about how this thing is a koan, I've built one and you can put it together in your head or go out and build one in your shop, but you cannot say that this is a fake, but the only time I've ever seen this cube was in my own mind. So no, your honor, I have not actually seen the Cube, have I?'

And yes, apparently there are times when you can actually tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth under oath and neither you, the judge, nor the jury, will ever be able to ask that question in court again, but the prosecution will have to admit that asking an open ended question in which the answers can be Quantum statements, a 'symmetry of duality' in which 'yes' or 'no' or 'it was invisible, ' or 'it was actually sighted with your own eyes, ' and 'witnessed first hand, ' and no matter what forces of the legal community can summon, there is no actual way in which a court can Order a person to produce a paradox for it to examine, so by this little slight of hand trick, should the occasion ever arise, as the person who taught you this trick that when they next ask 'what was your time?', it is permissible under oath to state what your preferred time in history was, and not how long it took you to solve it, which is what the court will be expecting to hear: 'Why?' 'I always wanted to watch Pearl Harbor bombed.' Okay, go write a war report. List where you'd like to observe the battle from and be specific as to which risks you're willing to put up with, and 'no risks at all' is going to be so far back from the AA shells you'll pretty much have to bring some good binoculars, so have fun!

Time travel is usually thought impossible, you know?

I see, so you saw this cube in person you say? No, just read the reports. Could see it pretty clearly in my mind though. So you are a expert cranial cubic specialist? Well, yeah, I guess you could say so.

So! Did you or did you not, sir, INVENT the Cube!!!

There is more of this story...
The source of this story is Storiesonline

For the rest of this story you need to be logged in: Log In or Register for a Free account