Breaking Blades
Copyright© 2026 by FozzieBare
Chapter 4: “Gorilla” Warfare, Part One
The first wave of the Crusade concentrated its forces on two worlds.
The first barely had any defenders.
A battalion of Blades forces went thundering across the planet looking for people to shoot.
They mostly came up dry.
Here and there they found scouts or some kind of light WarMAC chassis, but even those did little more than confirm contact with a hostile force before either rapidly disengaging or rapidly dying.
The second planet, Tarkin’s Roost, was a slightly different kettle of fish.
Having heard what happened on the first world, the <TenMillionBlades> forces decided to mass a company at their landing zone, then send it out in a rapid spiral search pattern.
The logic was sound.
Any Reforged scouts who weren’t expecting the contact would have to run directly away from the advancing force. If they tried to circle around, sooner or later they would run into another Blade element.
Reforged, however, knew exactly where the Blades were.
And they had decided to welcome them to Reforged space with a tactic they called the Reforged Howdy-Doo.
Three artillery WarMACs waited until it looked like as much of the Blade force as possible had entered the preselected splash zone.
Then they fired full salvos.
Unlike the Maximum Boom artillery saturation Reforged had used previously, this wasn’t enough firepower to turn the entire area into an explosive hellscape.
It didn’t need to be.
Two WarMACs were destroyed outright.
Four more took damage.
That was the Howdy.
The Blades immediately went after the artillery units.
They were almost in range of the fleeing WarMACs when two more Reforged artillery machines opened fire from another position.
The second barrage was unsighted and largely unaimed. It destroyed only one WarMAC and badly damaged two more.
Only.
That was the Doo.
The Blade commander broke off pursuit.
It was the right decision.
For all they knew, Reforged had another artillery position waiting beyond that one, and another beyond that. They had no intention of spending the afternoon stumbling through prepared ambushes while chasing artillery across unfamiliar terrain.
Those Reforged sons of bitches were tricky.
Better to break contact.
Get back to the landing zone.
Establish a perimeter.
Bring everyone down.
Then start hunting.
The hunting turned out to be rather sparse.
But morale was quickly returning to the Blades.
Despite the losses, the landings had confirmed their biases.
Reforged had taken its shot at the former homeworlds and hoped it would be enough to make the Blades turn back to recover what they had lost.
Now that the Crusade had actually arrived?
Reforged wasn’t going to fight.
They were exactly what leadership had said they were.
Spineless little pussies.
The Blades didn’t even care that the mines and factories had been cleaned out just before the landings, almost as if Reforged had known exactly when they were scheduled to arrive.
Soon enough, those mines and factories would be producing again.
Feeding the Blades. Replacing what they had lost.
They finally had the initiative again.
And this time, they were going to keep it.
Give them a day or two to fill their supply ships with raw materials, establish a proper supply chain, and move on.
Sooner or later, Reforged had to fight somewhere.
They slept well that night, dreaming the dreams of mighty conquerors.
But when they woke up, most of it had slipped through their fingers like sand through an hourglass.
In the strange dead hours of the night, the hours inhabited mostly by the terminally online and the circadian-challenged, Reforged had taken back roughly three-quarters of the Blades’ conquests.
Platoons had appeared from God knew where, fanned out across the map, and overwhelmed the scattered night owls still setting up bases and logistics for the occupation.
When the Blades came back online, cursing loudly about what the fuck was going on and how the fuck Reforged had pulled this off, they recaptured most of the bases within hours.
At every site, they found the same virtual note attached to the property.
One of the game’s standard icons.
A gorilla.
Beneath it:
Thanks for keeping it up and running! We’ll be back later for it, so no shooting it, K?
Signed,
REFORGED GORILLA WARFARE TEAM
It was safe to say the notes were not well received in Guild Chat when the Reforged counterattack became known in the early morning hours.
<Whack>: This is bullshit. You can’t just log on in the middle of the night and take back stuff we took during the day! That’s not how war works!
<Platique>: That’s how Universe at War works. Otherwise you might as well not even let people play during off-hours.
<Whack>: Whatever. It’s still bullshit!
There was a pause.
<Whack>: Two can play that damn game, though. I have an alt back on Ulysses. Let’s see how they...
The line broke off.
Another pause.
As if Whack had hit Enter at the exact moment he realized the problem with his thinking.
<Whack>: Shit.
<Platique>: Forgot Reforged doesn’t own that planet anymore?
<Whack>: Shut up.
<Platique>: Damn armistice. HeyNon thought he was buying safety. The only people that deal protects now are our enemies. We basically paid them for the privilege of letting them have our worlds.
<Whack>: Yeah. Ever since that tournament, we’ve been stepping on rakes, Plat. Now HeyNon has us fighting in a straitjacket.
<Platique>: If you’re about to make a “disarmed” joke, consider it made.
<Whack>: No. Well, yes, but ... I mean, it’s like every step we take is so freaking obvious the other side already has three counters waiting for it. Sooner or later, we need to stop reacting the way they want us to.
<Platique>: And ... do what?
<Whack>: I dunno. But that’s the shit leaders are supposed to figure out. They ain’t doin’ it.
<Platique>: Dude. Do NOT let them read that in chat. They’re touchy as fuck right now.
<Whack>: Of course not. Do I look stupid?
Another pause.
<Whack>: Don’t answer that.
<Platique>: Don’t worry, Whack. I like you. And I agree. But ... eh ... the guild, huh?
<Whack>: Yeah. The fucking guild.
Platique thought about it.
Then, instead of continuing in Guild Chat, where some stool pigeon could screenshot the conversation and send it up to leadership, he opened a private message.
“I get what you’re saying. So far, we’re three steps behind.”
He paused before adding:
“And there are people right now asking themselves, ‘If you had to choose a strategy to follow, which side would you rather be on?’”
There was no response for nearly a minute.
Then Whack replied.
“Yeah.”
Another pause.
“I mean, everything we’ve got still says we’re going to win. But ... what if we don’t?”
Whack’s next message took longer.
“We’re traveling in some mighty deep waters, Plat.”
“I just hope we don’t get pulled under.”
They both let that dangerous conversation rest there.
Then they went back to trying to recapture yet another base that had changed hands twice in the last twenty-four hours.
Some of Reforged had slept well that night.
The ones who weren’t participating in Gorilla Warfare.
It had originally been called “Guerrilla Warfare,” but an offhand comment from Abigail in Guild Chat had given it a slightly different name.
<MissileToe>: It’s not Guerrilla Warfare, it’s Gorilla Warfare. Since those idjits have been walking around pounding their chests like an overgrown silverback with too much testosterone.
Despite Elias’s protests that there were no gorillas in World of WarMachines, he was outvoted.
Elias knew that even if he demanded they use the proper name, they’d just keep calling it Gorilla Warfare anyway.
Rule #1 of command:
Never give an order you know won’t be obeyed.
Elias was rather happy with the way things were going so far.
It gave the invaders a series of unpalatable choices.
Option A was to ignore the counterattacks and move on to the next planet.
That was probably the best choice they had.
Elias didn’t have nearly enough forces to repeat Gorilla Warfare at the same intensity everywhere the Blades went.
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