A Greater Love
Copyright© 2026 by Megumi Kashuahara
Chapter 8
Dr. Reid’s office smelled like good coffee and something faintly botanical — the plant on the windowsill, Étain had decided, contributed more to the room than its size suggested.
It was the fifth session. Étain had stopped counting the days between them and started simply showing up, which Dr. Reid had noted without commenting on. The noting-without-commenting was one of the things Étain had come to appreciate about her. She registered things and let you arrive at them yourself.
“You’ve been thinking about the question,” Dr. Reid said. Not a question herself. An observation.
“Every day,” Étain said.
“And?”
Étain looked at the plant for a moment. “I think he sees someone worth the trouble. Which is —” she stopped. “I don’t know what to do with that. Because I don’t know if I agree with him.”
“That’s honest,” Dr. Reid said. “Is that the first time someone has seemed to think you were worth significant effort?”
Étain considered it carefully. “My mother does. But that’s different.”
“How is it different?”
“She’s my mother. She’s supposed to.” A pause. “And the way she does it — it’s more like —” she searched for the word. “Protecting something fragile. Like I might break. Jack doesn’t treat me like I might break.”
Dr. Reid was quiet for a moment. “How does he treat you?”
“Like I’m capable of more than I think I am,” Étain said. “And like he’s going to wait until I get there.”
The room was very quiet. Outside the window a car passed on B Street.
“I want to ask you something,” Dr. Reid said, “and I want you to sit with it rather than answer immediately. Can you do that?”
Étain nodded.
“When you imagine your life going well — not perfectly, just well — what does it look like? Not who’s in it. Just what it feels like.”
Étain sat with it the way she’d been asked to. The answer that came wasn’t what she expected.
“Safe,” she said finally. “But not — not the way my mom means safe. Not locked up safe. More like —” she searched. “Like having a place to stand. Solid ground. And then being able to move around on it without being afraid the floor is going to give way.”
Dr. Reid looked at her for a moment. “Remember that answer,” she said. “We’re going to come back to it.”
The hike was Jack’s suggestion, offered on a Tuesday at the lunch table in the same tone he offered most things — matter-of-fact, take it or leave it.
“Saturday. There’s a trail in the hills above Crystal Springs. Nothing technical. A few miles out and back.” He looked at her. “You pick the time.”
Étain looked at her lunch tray for a moment. Then: “Nine o’clock.”
“Nine o’clock,” he said, and went back to his food.
She’d chosen the time before she’d consciously decided to say yes. The yes had been in the time.
He picked her up at eight fifty-five. She was waiting at the curb.
The trail head was twenty minutes up into the hills, the road climbing through eucalyptus and dry chaparral, the bay spreading out below them as they gained elevation. Étain watched it through the window without talking much. Jack drove the way his father drove — relaxed, unhurried, both hands easy on the wheel.
At the trail head he got out and came around without commenting on the view, which was considerable. Étain came around the other side and they stood at the edge of the lot where the path began.
“You lead,” he said.
She looked at him. “I don’t know the trail.”
“Neither do I,” he said. “That’s fine.”
A beat. Then she turned and started up the path.
The trail was well-maintained and rose through coastal scrub, the bay visible in gaps between the hills. Étain set a moderate pace without being told to. She moved carefully over the uneven sections, chose the smoothest line through the rocky parts. Jack fell in behind her and stayed there.
She didn’t look back to check if he was following. That was new.
They walked for forty minutes before the fork.
The path split at a low ridge — one branch continuing along the spine of the hill, the other dropping into a shaded canyon to the left. There was no signage indicating which was preferable. Étain stopped at the split and looked at both options.
Jack stopped behind her and said nothing.
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