A Loving Light
Copyright© 2026 by Marc Nobbs
Chapter 19: A Taste of Home
“Maybe we should have gone to Millie’s first and then called in on Will on the way home,” I said.
“Why?”
I glanced over at Lana. “Vicky does a Sunday Carvery, but she stops serving it at three.”
“So, they’ll be closed when we get there? What are you planning to do? Beg her to cook just for us?”
“No.” I smiled. “Although she probably would. She still thinks she needs to look after me. But they don’t close the restaurant at three, they just stop the carvery and revert to the usual menu. Not that it usually matters. She once told me that the place is deserted on Sundays from three until about six.”
“We won’t have trouble getting a table then?”
I glanced at her again. “We wouldn’t ever have any trouble anyway. She says she’ll always find room for me—even if it’s in the actual kitchen.”
“Well, I hope you’re right, and it’s not busy. I really don’t fancy sitting in the kitchen.” She paused. “We wouldn’t have made it there for three, anyway. It was almost three when we got to your friend’s house.”
“Will,” I said. “His name’s Will.”
Lana nodded. “And he’s lovely. You really got to him with that whiskey, didn’t you? Did you know that about him wanting to go to that distillery with your dad?”
I shook my head. “Nope. There’s a lot about their relationship I didn’t know. Still don’t, in fact.”
She nodded. “Sophie was really excited. She reminds me of Lily—or that type, at least. You know, from school. I didn’t really know Lily at school because she was in the year above me, but she’s definitely a ‘type’, don’t you think? Like an archetype.” She frowned. “Or a stereotype.”
I looked at her and arched an eyebrow. “What’s the difference?”
She shrugged. “I don’t really know.”
“So what’s Lily’s type?”
“The popular girl,” Lana said without hesitation. “Fun. Bubbly. Happy.” She paused. “Everyone likes Lily. It’s impossible not to.”
I glanced at her.
“Don’t tell her I said that,” Lana said. “Please.”
I mimed zipping my lips shut and throwing away the key.
She shrugged. “I guess ... I guess we all fit in a ‘type’ at school, didn’t we?”
“Did we?”
She nodded. “Everyone did. It’s what school does to you.”
I shook my head. “I never really thought about it.”
“No, you wouldn’t. You were one of the positive ones. Unlike me.”
“Mousey Alannah?”
She nodded. “The ugly duckling.”
I glanced at her and smiled. “Who became a beautiful swan.”
She rolled her eyes. “A swan with boobs that all the boys suddenly noticed.”
“Yeah, boys and boobs, huh?” I said. “Like, total nightmare.”
“Yeah, totally!”
We glanced at each other and grinned. Then started laughing.
“Paul!” Vicky was at the back of the dining room with Jess when she saw me walk in. She rushed over and hugged me. Hard.
“Hey, sis, ease up. You’ll break a rib.”
She pulled back and grinned. “Sorry. It’s been a long day. Just surprised to see you, that’s all. How was your trip?”
“It was good. We got a lot done.”
“Good. I’m glad. So ... Did you just come to say hello, or are you here for something to eat?”
“I’m starving. Haven’t eaten since they served us breakfast on the plane.”
She frowned. “How come? It’s not like you to skip lunch.”
“Just ... You know. Passport control. Customs. Security. Then the car ride back. It just kind of ... passed us by.”
“Us?” She arched an eyebrow, then looked around me to see Lana, who was standing behind me.
Or should that be ‘hiding’ behind me?
“Hi,” Vicky said, smiling. “It’s Alannah, right? One of the Clarissa Award winners?”
Lana nodded. “Just Lana.”
“Paul took you with him, right? How’s he been? Behaving himself?”
Lana nodded. “He was good. Brilliant actually. He gave this speech...” She blushed. “Sorry ... I just...”
“Well, you’ll have to tell me about it while you eat.” She smirked and said, “Let’s see if we can find you a table. I might just about be able to squeeze you in.”
She turned and strode into the empty dining room.
Lana glanced at me and mouthed, “Sorry,” without making a noise.
I frowned. “What for?”
She shrugged.
“Come on, let’s go and decide what to eat.”
Vicky sat us at the ‘best table in the house,’ though I have no idea what made it the best. Then Jess brought us the menus.
“Wine?” Vicky said. “On the house.”
“Not for me,” I said. “I’ve got to drive back.” I glanced at Lana and raised an eyebrow.
“I wouldn’t mind. Just a small one, if that’s okay?”
“I already have a bottle open that we were sharing. I’ll bring it right over.”
“Hang on,” I said. “I’ve got something for you first. For both of you.”
I still had my jute bag with me and took out the last two items—two identical presentation boxes about the size of a large cooking apple. I held them out to my sister and her wife.
Or maybe that should just be ‘my sisters.’
“What’s this?” Vicky said, opening the box. She lifted an intricately detailed pewter flower from inside, its petals captured in a permanent state of full bloom, polished to a soft, warm shine.
“Oh, Paul ... It’s beautiful.”
Jess took hers from the box, too. It wasn’t quite the same.
“They’re handmade,” I said. “So each one is unique. I got them in a little artisan’s studio. They’re magnolias. They have them all over the city—the real ones, I mean.”
Vicky nodded. “I know. Mum used to have one in the garden, do you remember?”
I nodded. “She loved that tree.”
“She did.”
“The...” I gulped. “The artist said that they’re a symbol of strength.” I paused. “Female strength. And resilience.”
Vicky looked up at me. Tears were forming in her eyes. “I hate you,” she said softly. “Come here.” She reached out and pulled me into another rib-crushing hug. “They’re perfect. Absolutely perfect.”
“They’ll look great on the mantle above the fireplace,” Jess said. “One at each end.”
Vicky glanced at her. “Exactly what I was thinking.” She looked at me. “The wallpaper on the feature wall behind the fireplace has a magnolia blossom pattern. These really are perfect.”
“Your sister is lovely,” Lana said, leaning forward across the table so she could speak quietly. The big advantage of being the only people in a restaurant is that the service is really quick. The disadvantage is that your conversation carries across the whole room, echoing and amplifying as if you were in a cave by the beach.
I nodded. “She is. She really is. I guess I’m lucky in some ways.”
Lana frowned. “Lucky?”
I nodded again. “Lucky that she was old enough when Mum and Dad were killed that she could become my Legal Guardian. I mean, Will was my Guardian too, but because Vicky was nearly twenty, I got to stay with her in the family home—the only house I’d ever known. If she’d been a couple of years younger, then...” I shrugged.
“I can’t even imagine it. What you’ve been through is just ... Or maybe I just don’t want to imagine it. The thought of...” She shook her head.
“I don’t blame you.”
There was silence between us for a few seconds. Not an uncomfortable silence. Just ... silence.
Eventually, she said, very quietly, “How did you cope?”
I took a breath. “Badly, for the most part. At the time, I thought I was coping well, but...” I shrugged. “I was with Ellie at the time, and I think I was a bit of a bastard to her for a while. Taking it out on her, you know? We ... We didn’t last long. Although we probably lasted longer than we should have. I think she didn’t want to be the one to break up with the guy who’d just lost his parents. So my ... er ... indiscretion ... gave her the excuse she needed.”
“Indiscretion?” Lana arched an eyebrow.
“She caught me snogging someone else.”
“Oh. Right.” Her disappointment was written all over her face.
“In my defence, I was only fifteen.”
“That’s not much of a defence, Paul.”
“I know.” I shrugged. “Like I said, I thought I was coping well, but clearly I wasn’t.”
Lana nodded. “I ... I can’t imagine.”
“I was the opposite with Kelly. I was ... indifferent towards Ellie, I think that’s the best way to describe it. But I fell hard for Kelly. Too hard, really. I think it scared her in the end.” I shook my head. “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this.”
Lana smiled. “Unguarded. Remember?”
I nodded. “Unguarded.”
Jess brought out our starters just then. I’d ordered potato skins loaded with cheese and bacon pieces while Lana had breaded mushrooms.
I looked up and smiled after she placed the plates in front of us. “Thanks, Jess.”
“No worries. Enjoy. Are you okay for drinks?”
“I’m good,” I said, nodding towards my still-full pint glass of Coke.
“Could I have a small Coke, please?” Lana said, then she picked up her wine glass and drained it.
“Not more wine?”
Lana shook her head. “No, one was enough. It was lovely though.”
“Wasn’t it just? It’s a French Riesling. One of my favourites. I’ll bring the Coke right over.”
“She’s lovely too,” Lana said, as Jess walked away.
I nodded. “What can I say, my sister has great taste in women.” I shook my head. “I still can’t believe I had no idea she was gay. Didn’t find out until I got back from America eighteen months ago. She came out while I was away.”
I picked up my knife and fork and dove right in. Lana smirked and then did the same. So neither of us spoke for a while as we ate, but eventually, Lana said, “This is really good. I know it’s only mushrooms but ... this mayo with them is really nice.”
I nodded. “Told you.” I pointed down at my nearly empty plate with my knife. “This is one of my favourites. Vic used to make it at home. Mum did too. It’s her recipe.”
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