The Privy Report 2
Copyright© 2026 by Old Grey Duck
Chapter 46
An old man walks into his favorite bar and orders a water.
The bartender is surprised. “Joe! You always order a beer. And where is your wife, Mary? You two are always together!”
The old man sighed. “We had a big fight last month and she was so mad at me she said that she wouldn’t talk to me for 30 days.”
Bartender: “So are you drinking water to celebrate?”
The old man smiled. “Because today is day 30. Tomorrow I can finally have a beer in peace. But tonight I’m celebrating being alive after 30 days of silence!”
A woman died and found herself standing outside the gates of Heaven. Saint Peter greeted her and smiled. “Before we can let you in, you need to pass a test.”
“And what would that be?”
“Please spell the word ‘LOVE’ for me.” The woman did and was allowed to enter.
Five years passed and one day Saint Peter had to run a few errands so he asked the lady to watch the gate for him. She agreed to help.
Less than an hour later, the woman saw her husband walking towards the gate. “How have you been?” she asked. “Not bad,” he replied. “I married the pretty nurse who took care of you and then I won the lottery. I sold our tiny cottage and bought a mansion and my wife and I traveled around the world.”
“He paused a moment. “Today I was skiing and fell. Broke my neck, and well, here I am. So how do I get in?”
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