The Privy Report 2
Copyright© 2026 by Old Grey Duck
Chapter 44
You might not know this, but every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes. Legend has it, that in Japan, if you can’t sleep at night, you’re awake. Because when the sun goes down, it’s night. Also, if you walk far enough, you’re somewhere else.
I need to get my life together. But I’m waiting to see if the world ends, before I put any effort into it.
Reasons Why Alcohol Should Be Served At Work:
1: Incentive to show up.
2: Leads to more honest communication.
3: Reduces stress.
4: Employees work later, because there’s no rush to get to the bar.
5: Encourages carpooling.
6: Makes your coworkers more attractive.
7: Reduces vacations because employees want to come to work.
8: Burping doesn’t seem inappropriate. Just funny.
9: Increases overall job satisfaction.
10: If your job suck, you don’t care.
Then & Now:
I used to have a favorite place to drink. Now, I have a favorite oven mitt.
I used to be jealous of people who had nice cars. Now, I’m jealous of people who can process saturated fats.
I used to wake up and look forward to doing exercise. Now, I will watch a show on the television because the remote is too far away to reach.
I used to call my friends so we could decide what house we would be partying at. Now, my friends and I text crock pot recipes to each other.
I used to be excited when I had plans to go out. Now, I get even more excited when those plans get canceled.
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