The Privy Report 2
Copyright© 2026 by Old Grey Duck
Chapter 23
Earlier today, I got a call from a polite fellow saying that he was calling me from Microsoft. “Hello sir, my name is Gupta and I’m calling from Microsoft. The reason for my call is that we have found a serious problem with your computer. It could be catastrophic for your online data and banking. But, I can fix it for you.”
“Oh, that is troublesome,” I replied. “But Gupta, I don’t actually have a computer.”
“Perhaps it is your laptop, sir?” (Doubtful since I don’t have one.) “An iPad? A tablet?” (Sorry, I don’t even have one of those.) There was a long pause.
“Gupta, I don’t even have a phone,” I commented.
Finally he blurted out “That’s impossible! You’re lying to me!”
“Well, you started it!” (Click.)
A man meets an exceptionally beautiful woman at a bar and asks “Cai I buy you a drink?”
The woman nods and says “Yes, but it won’t do you any good.”
Throughout the evening, the man buys her several more drinks and each time the woman states”It won’t do you any good.”
At closing time, the man invites the woman back to his apartment. She accepts and onec again says “It won’t do you any good.”
As they enter the apartment, he turns and says “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met. I want you for my wife.”
“Oh, that’s different. Please send her out and don’t forget to close the door when you leave.”
A man whose wife went missing in Alaska on a kayaking trip answered his door to see a grim faced state trooper. “I’m very sorry sir, but I have some information about your missing wife.”
“Did you find her?” the man asked. “Is she okay?”
“We have some bad news, good news, and some really good news,” the trooper stated.
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