Chapter 3

There was a moment after I pushed the plug in my ass that there was nothing but silence, shame, and regret. What had I just done? Whatever it was, I couldn’t undo it now.

Then the tittering laughter started to spread like a slow golf clap.

“Oh my god, that plug wasn’t any bigger than a thumb,” my mom was the first one to speak after Tiffy. I wasn’t sure if she was trying to console me or tell me to simply stop looking like it was the end of the world. “Good for you! Commit to the bit!”

“Most moms don’t want you to get caught playing with yourself in the living room,” I felt my pulse jump, half scared, and half thrilled. I was deeply ashamed of myself and humiliated, but a part of me was expecting to get told I couldn’t do something like that.

“Most moms are repressed bitches that don’t understand you have to try something to find out if you like it or not, and everybody plays with themselves, honey.” My mom smiled.

“Also, your mom has had about eight glasses of wine,” Dad smiled lovingly at her.”

“I am by no means drunk,” my mother assured me. “I just get a little Lucy goosey when I have a little wine, and I am going to need it if I am going to carry my big fat ass around the neighborhood dressed like a slutty nurse.”

“Hey. It’s awesome you shoved a plug up your butt,” Kevin was beside himself. He was so thoroughly amused that he couldn’t contain his excitement as he stared at the tail hanging out of the back of my skirt in awe. “You can do that in the living room ANY TIME.”

I blushed, completely mortified.

“Actually, I was going to say, I don’t want you to whip your skirt off and diddle your clit in the living room, but I am thrilled you committed to the costume and wore it like a good sport. Let’s see how obediently your cousin keeps her end of the deal and barks like a dog when she breaks character,” My mom teased her niece.

“Sorry to disappoint you, Aunt Betty,” my cousin danced magically and waved her wand, while batting her impossibly long eyelashes. “I am not going to break character. Tinkerbell doesn’t crawl, she flies,” Tiffy jingled around the room effortlessly.

“Well, let’s fly the fuck out of here because it’s getting dark and all the candy will be gone,” my aunt reminded us that we needed to get moving.

“Agreed, if I had known it would be this easy to get everyone to act the part on Halloween, I would have made my daughter shove a plug up her ass a long time ago,” my mom laughed heartily. “We can talk about the rest of the rules on the way to the haunted house. We have our master with us to make rulings on the fly if we need them,” my mom took off her leash and gave it back to my cousin Jessie.

“Aww,” he smiled impishly.

We headed for the door. “Hey, can I be a master too?” Kevin asked as we filed out onto our well-lit porch.

“Absolutely not,” I said about the same time that Tiffy said basically the same thing. “We don’t need another power-tripping pervert.”

“Sorry, he’s a puppet MASTER, and you are a Jedi, Kevin,” my mom smirked as we walked down the sidewalk toward the neighbor’s haunted house.

There were spooky sounds, and people screaming and running around in the darkness. Mr. Johnson builds a haunted house in his garage every year, and it gets bigger, expanding well into his yard. He and his wife were dressed as ghouls, welcoming people in.

“I AM A JEDI MASTER,” Kevin sliced the light saber in the air a few times and then whapped my mother’s butt with it.

Mom yelped and grabbed her ass to shield herself. “Hey, watch where you are sticking that thing!”

“Hey, you said MY son needs to assert himself and learn how to lead, Betty,” my aunt teased my mother playfully. “Your ass makes a pretty good target.”

“I must strike down the dark side,” Kevin implied that my mom’s butthole was the darkest of the dark.

Mom wiggled her butt in an exaggerated way like a trotting horse. “I didn’t say you could smack my big old dark side anytime you wanted. Is that what you think, Masters do, Kevin?”

Kevin put his lightsaber down and shifted his weight as we got in line to enter the haunted house. A dirty old man gawked at me and Tiffy, and we both gave him back the evil eye...

My little brother looked our mom up and down with that cocky smirk he had perfected. “I think the Masters enforce the rules of the house, Mom, because Dad said the Master of the House decides the consequences,” Kevin explained, justifying his action as a way to test the hierarchy Dad established.

“Rules of the house, huh?” Mom seemed amused by his seriousness. She squinted and raised an eyebrow to take his measure. “First, tell me what rule I broke, Master Kevin? I’m out here carousing on Halloween, I’m dressed like a slutty nurse, ready to resuscitate, give mouth-to-mouth, or elevate someone’s heart rate if needed. So, why do I need my dark side smacked?”

The people nearby heard my mom’s conversation and whispered among themselves with amusement. My mom didn’t seem to care.

Kevin doubted himself for a moment and became a little introspective.

Kevin quickly retrieved the lightsaber and spun it once, as if thinking about his answer. The way he paused before speaking so that you to anticipate his words, and you found yourself now wanting to hear what he actually had to say.