Blame Charlie
Copyright© 2012 by dotB
Chapter 2
I just stared at that attaché case for a few minutes, then decided the guy probably wasn’t coming back that day, which meant I had to move it. There was even an extremely slim chance that someone might drop by and it wouldn’t be polite to have that sort of temptation staring any visitors in the face. There was no way I was going to pick that case up though, not with my bad back I wasn’t, especially since it had to weigh close to two hundred pounds. Instead I headed for the basement to find a moving dolly. First though, I carefully closed the lid of the case – no sense in leaving that sort of temptation open to the local ravens or jays who collect any sort of bright object.
After I’d come back with a moving dolly I heaved and grunted until I’d managed to tip the case up on its narrow side. Next I skidded first one end, then the other onto the little plate at the bottom of the dolly. Finally I tipped the dolly back, wheeled it inside the house and straight into my office, where I could keep that case under lock and key. Even then I wasn’t happy about having that much gold in the house, but not in my safe. Only I knew the case was too big to fit in my little safe and I wasn’t about to move the individual coins out of that case. At least not until I had made up my mind about the deal, which was definitely going to take some thought. In fact, I decided that I needed some advice from some professionals.
First, I called my banker and lawyer cousins and asked them to drop out to see me that evening. Since they were involved in the ranch as minority owners – they held the final 33% of the title for the ranch between them – I felt they needed to have some input concerning the decision of what to do. Besides, Fred, my banker cousin, could check over those Krugerrands and tell me if they were real or counterfeit copies. At the same time, Bert, the lawyer cousin, could write up a rental contract for the weirdo to sign, which would limit his actions and cover our butts for any legal comeback he might have. I thought that between them, they could make sure I wasn’t stepping into a minefield if I did rent any property to the kook.
Next, I called down to the ranch house and talked to José Cabrera, my ranch foreman. I asked him if he, his wife, Maria, and my range boss, Diego Diaz, could come up to my house for a short business meeting at the same time as my cousins would be there that evening. I felt that the ranch was their home too, and I didn’t want them to be taken by surprise if that oddball suddenly showed up and started to do something weird. Joe agreed at once, but he suggested that he and Maria should come early and bring up the fixings for a barbecue, suggesting that we could make an evening of it. When I mentioned why I was having the meeting and that my two cousins were coming out later, he suggested that we include them, so I called Fred again and extended the invitation to come out earlier. He called back shortly and agreed that he and Bert would come out right after work, so they’d be there by about six in the evening.
I didn’t go far from the house for the rest of the day, since I just didn’t want that dang attaché case left unattended for long. In fact, I even laid the dang thing down flat, opened it up, and made a more accurate count of how many Krugerrands were there, and my earlier estimate had been wrong. First off, the coins were stacked in an offset pattern on a diagonal – one row against the edge of the case, and the second row stacked so the curve of that stack fit into the space left by the curves of the first set. That meant there were 9 rows of stacked coins, not 8, but each row was still 13 stacks long, which meant that instead of 104 stacks of coins, there were 117. I wasn’t about to try lifting a stack to count them, but I did take a ruler and measured the height of each stack, and I had been almost exactly right with that estimate. The ruler measured the inside height at just over 3 inches, so allowing some space for the little lid which flipped down to cover the coins, the depth of the space was 3 inches - right on the money. If I was right in my estimation that there were 25 coins in each stack, then that little case held more than my original estimation, though. Actually, when I grabbed a calculator and worked it out, I came up with a figure of $4,387,500.00. No damn wonder it was heavy.
It was about then that I realized that the case had probably been purposely made to hold those coins because the stacks resting against each other prevented the coins from shifting around. I looked over that case closely and saw it was welded up out of quarter-inch aluminum sheet, so it was certainly strong enough to carry the weight of the gold. Only there was one small mystery left that I didn’t understand: the upper part of the lid seemed to be about an inch thick and looked like a solid piece. That didn’t make much sense until I thought about it a bit and considered how the attaché case I owned was laid out. Mine had a little pocket in the lid which I used for loose papers, pens, pencils, and things of that sort, but that space on the oddball’s attaché case seemed to be tightly enclosed, and I couldn’t open it, at least not easily.
The idea that there might be papers in there stirred my curiosity though, and the guy had just walked away and left the case standing wide open, as if it wasn’t important that he’d left it behind. So I looked that lid over closely, and I noticed that there were two slightly polished spots in the inside upper corners of the lid and a couple of slightly polished spots opposite those on the outside of the lid. I’d seen kitchen cabinet locks that worked by pressing inward, then releasing the pressure, and I wondered if the case lid might be similar. Just in case it was, I didn’t want to leave any marks or fingerprints behind, so I went to the kitchen and got the rubber gloves I used for washing the dishes.
Yeah, you could probably say I was ‘cheating’ – so what? I was dealing with an associate of Charlie Mullins – one of the biggest cheaters in all of North America. I could explain away my fingerprints on the outside of that case and even on the top few Krugerrands, but I didn’t want to leave fingerprints on anything that had been ‘hidden’ from a casual observer. You could call me overly cautious, or perhaps even slightly paranoid, if you want to, but I prefer to think that I’m ‘once bitten – twice shy.’ I simply insist on being extremely cautious of anyone who associates with Charlie or any of the Mullins clan. Right then I intended to take advantage of any slight edge that might put me in the driver’s seat concerning that clan of reprobates.
My suspicions were correct and by squeezing those two spots, then instantly releasing them, the cover of the upper lid area popped open and I could see that there were some papers inside. Still wearing my rubber gloves I carefully pulled those papers out and glanced through them, then as I read the fine print on the bottom of those contracts I began to grow angry. Although I was soon seething with rage, I carefully held my temper under control and dialled my cousin Bert, the lawyer.
“Bert, you know the big hill we call ‘The Dome?’” I growled.
“Yeah, what about it?”
“The guy had a contract in a hidden compartment of this attaché case that looks like a simple rental agreement – until you read the fine print. From what I can understand by reading that part it seems to imply that if he stays there for thirty days, he can virtually stay as long as he wants and do whatever he wants while he’s here. Now there is no way I’m going along with that, but what pisses me off is that there are two versions of the contract, one with that fine print on it and one without and two copies of each version. Only the two copies that have the fine print included have already been signed by both parties, so someone has already forged my name, almost perfectly too. I suspect Janet was involved.”
“Well, the first thing I have to assume then is that the money is fake as well, but Fred can check that in a hurry. If the money is fake, I can have a couple of RCMP officers there when the guy comes back, and they can arrest him for forgery, attempted robbery, and so on.
“However, after some thought, I have an idea that the money must be real, since the guy has to live there for thirty days. In that case, you have two choices to make, and the choices aren’t that hard to explain either. You have the choice of turning him down and chasing him off in front of witnesses, or you have the second choice of accepting the money and allowing me to help you turn the tables on him. You see, with a Xerox machine and a computer, I can duplicate that second contract, but change the fine print to make him ‘personna non gratta’ if he remains on the property after thirty days. Done correctly, the computer can fake his signature so well that no one would ever suspect it was forged, while yours could be your actual signature. Come to think of it though, it would be better to forge both signatures.”
“Umm, I don’t have a Xerox machine.” I snorted. “Can you buy one on the way out here, and I’ll pay you for it when you get here?”
“Well, have you got a full-page scanner and a decent printer for your computer?”
“You know darn well I do. You bought them for me when Fred gave me the new computer with all the fancy accounting software already installed in it for Christmas.”
“Then we’re in business,” he snorted out a laugh. “Now, one last thing, have you got a couple of decent beds in that old house so a couple of your cousins can spend the night?”
“Yeah, you know how big this house is, and I’m sure you know I don’t have any crappy beds in the whole place. Why?”
“Because both Fred and I are going to be working late, and we’re going to want to be there in the morning so we can be witnesses to whatever happens.”
“Why will you two be working late?”
“Because Fred is going to want to test each and every one of those coins, Dave, and don’t be surprised if you’re working at our side. After all, that gold is your money, not ours. Besides, it’s going to take a while for me to rework that contract so it still closely resembles the fake, but has the exact opposite meaning.”
“Okay, I’ll make up a couple of beds. Do you have a preference of rooms?”
“Yeah, a room with a view,” he laughed, then hung up the phone.
“Asshole!” I growled to the dead phone, but only because when Grandad built the house, he decided to build it on a knoll, so there wasn’t a room in the place that doesn’t have a decent view.
Before I’d even hung up the phone, I had a sudden thought and dialled Bert again.
“Yes, Dave.”
“Do me a favour and pick up a dozen pairs of surgical gloves on your way out here, would you? I’m tired of using my dish washing gloves to handle these papers.”
“Oh, good thought, Davey me lad! Fingerprints!” he chuckled. “Dammit, with a little training, I could turn you into a decent crook.”
“Hah, I had six months of involuntary training at being a crook from Janet, and she was a professional, not some middle-aged lawyer wannabe!” I snapped, then I hung up on him for a change.
I wasn’t really annoyed with Bert, or not much, but there are times I wished that he’d forget that he’s five years older than I am. In all honesty, if he hadn’t owned almost 17% of the shares in the ranch, I would probably have been using a different lawyer, but he did, and I owed him at least that much deference. Besides, blood is thicker than water, even if a relative can get under your skin faster than anyone else, simply because he knows all of your tender spots.
So I took a few deep breaths to calm myself, then slipped those annoying contracts back into the hidey-hole in the attaché case and closed the upper lid again. Then I closed the main lid to hide the gold, and I even draped an old horse blanket and a winter coat over the case, letting them fall as if they were simply abandoned there. There wasn’t much chance that anyone would walk into my office, but if they did, that aluminum case was out of sight now, if not out of mind.
I didn’t want to leave the house to go do any work around my personal mini-ranch because of that damn gold, but I didn’t really have anything to do around the house either. My cleaning lady had just been there a couple of days before, so the house was still spotless. All I had to do was make up a couple of beds, which took about twenty minutes. After that, I perked myself some coffee and sat on the front porch, contemplating what I’d really like to do to Charlie and Janet Mullins.
I know that wasn’t really constructive, but it gave me something else to think about other than that weird bovine-looking character that they’d sicced on me. He looked just plain creepy and made my skin crawl. The more I thought about him, the stranger he seemed to be, and I realized that instead of keeping my mind off of him, my thoughts of the Mullins clan were now tied to him as well.
Okay, just what did I know about that shmuck? He looked strange, he acted strange, and come to think of it, my dog didn’t like him. Hmm, I wasn’t a science fiction fan, but dammit, the guy was a prime fit for an alien or a spaceman if I’d even seen one, but come on, did I really want to start believing in little green men? Just the thought of that made me laugh, but although I tried to put it out of my mind, it kept creeping back again and again. I finally decided that tomorrow morning I was going to get an answer, one way or the other. I was going to have Fred and Bert there as well, and I’d ask the weirdo just where he was from. Then I was going to ask him for proof that he was on Canadian soil legally. If I was going to be renting some land to the man, I definitely had the right to know that much about him, and while I was at it, I wanted to know something about his background.
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