AWACS - An American With A Chinese System
Copyright© 2025 by PT Brainum
Chapter 13
The place got crowded quickly once the singing started. I was soon surrounded by couples and singles there to enjoy the music. Some had wine, a few mixed drinks, but most had some sort of coffee.
I remembered I had a kazoo in storage, so I blew on it loudly as she performed the last song of the first set. She laughed, and waved, and headed to the back. The tall guy followed her as somebody else settled in behind the piano. I guess the brass band wasn’t on tonight, or at least yet.
I was staring at my empty cup, wondering if I could risk my seat for a refill, when the pink haired girl dropped a reserved sign on the table, a second coffee made exactly like I wanted, and a handwritten message, “Mo says to join her back in the green room if you want.”
I thanked her, picked up the coffee, and walked through the swinging doors she had exited thru. She was easy to find, the sounds of laughter were coming from an open doorway at the end of the hallway.
I poked my head past the door jamb to find her sitting on a couch with the tall guy, and two other guys on a couch perpendicular to them.
“Come in my patron,” she called to me.
I waved, and stepped into the room. The tall guy stood up, strode over and stuck out a hand, “I’m Paul, those are the Bobbsey twins, you know Mo.”
“Great job tonight, you’re really talented,” I told him.
“Thanks, Wife couldn’t stand my playing, insisted I go somewhere else. So I started this place.”
“She didn’t like piano?”
“She didn’t like me, I didn’t like Chicago. It worked out,” he said smiling.
I turned to the Bobbsey twins, “Which is Fran, and which is Nan?” I asked.
“Who?” the one on the left asked.
“I’m Freddie, he’s Flo,” said the one on the right.
“Seriously?” I asked.
“Nah, I’m Bill, and he’s Connor. It’s just that you tend to find us together, when you find us.”
I laughed, and shook their hands.
Paul had left the spot he had been in free, and taken the only other chair, so when Mo patted the seat, I took it. It was a pretty beat up looking couch, but it was comfortable.
“So Koby, how many weirdos have you met so far?” Mo asked me.
“I’ve only been out and about for a couple days, so three? Outside this room of course.”
Paul laughed, and Bill chuckled. Connor was deep into his phone.
“So where did you get the kazoo? I thought you had to check those when you came in?” Paul asked.
“Mo assured me that it wouldn’t be culturally inappropriate,” I responded.
The smile made his eyes crinkle.
“I can’t believe you played a kazoo!” Mo insisted.
It had earned me twelve thousand points. I’d play a kazoo all night for that many points.
“It happens,” I said.
Bill laughed again, but Connor looked up, asking, “What happens?”
“Kazoo,” Mo said.
“Bless you,” he said, and went back to his phone. Everyone broke into laughter.
“So show me your Kazoo,” Mo said.
“Really? Here? Just whip it out in front of everybody?” I asked, innocent shocked face carefully in place.
Paul stood, “You’re fun, but I’ve got some stuff to do before my next set, nice meeting you Koby, hope you stick around for the next set.”
Connor didn’t even look up, “Nice meeting you Koby,” he said, oblivious to the conversation. Bill just snorted, while Mo rolled her eyes.
“Did you plan this, bringing the kazoo?” Mo asked, turning serious.
“Nah, it came up in conversation, and I happened to know where one was. I saved it for the last song though.”
Bill wanted to know, “How does kazoo come up in conversation.”
“I wanted to know if it was culturally appropriate. I don’t have much experience with Portland jazz bars.”
“He had been snapping his fingers like a beatnik on Tuesday,” she told him.
“I thought that’s what you did. Then you said to just clap, and I didn’t want to make any other embarrassing mistakes.”
Bill asked, “What culture would be offended by kazoos?”
“How would I know, it’s my first time in Portland.”
Bill laughed, but Mo smiled big at me. It was still a really nice smile.
We talked and made jokes, and every once in a while someone would say kazoo, and Connor would say, “Bless you,” and we all found it hilarious.
Paul stuck his head in the room, “Alright Mo, we are up, and Bill, make sure Connor is ready, you guys are up after us.”
I followed them out the hallway, and took my seat.
Pink came by and asked what I wanted to drink. I asked for water, and she took my empty coffee cup with her.
A buxom blond sat at my table, blocking my view.
“Sorry,” she said, and scooted over.
When pink dropped off my water, blondie took it, and guzzled it down.
I wondered what to do.
Finally blondie turned to me, “The sign was right, you are very reserved,” then she stood, and went thru the doors and down the hallway towards the green room.
Portland is weird, but I just put it out of mind, and concentrated on the deep voice as it sent waves down my spine.
The second set went even better than the first, and I got invited back again. They ordered takeout from a local Thai place. Nobody object when I offered to buy. Mo noticed the fifty dollar bill summoned into my hand as I tipped the delivery boy who came to the back door.
“Do you do magic?”
“Sort of,” I said as I handed out the boxes of amazing smells.
“You know she finds you very interesting,” Bill commented as he took his pad thai, and handed Connors his.
Paul had taken a plastic tub of some sort of yellowish curry off to his office. So just the four of us were gathered around the table that sat against the wall that didn’t have couches ... I handed Mo her basil chicken, and sat opening up my fried rice.
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