Chapter 22

There are times when clocks don’t move. When breathing doesn’t happen. It’s like when the time machine in that movie adaptation of Wells’s story when all the dials stop and you wonder if the frame is frozen.

The moments after asking a woman out are one of those times. Seconds turned into eternity. I stood there in Joey’s kitchen trying not to breathe in that moment between tossing the dice and seeing them land.

But then Britt’s smile broadened into a grin.

“I’d like that.”

And suddenly the clocks caught up. The oven beeped as the preheating finished. Carmen’s laugh floated in from the dining room.

“Great!” I said. “Uh ... is tomorrow too soon?”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “I’ve got plans.”

“Next Friday?”

“That’d work.”

Carmen’s laughter doubled and Britt looked pointedly at the pie.

“Oh, right.” I opened the oven, slid it in, and then looked around for a timer.

“Here.” She pulled one out of a drawer and handed it to me.

“So what time’s good for you?” I asked as I set the timer.

“Mmm ... let’s talk tomorrow. Okay?”

“Sounds good.”

When we walked back into the living room, Carmen looked expectantly at both Britt and me. When I gave her a sheepish grin, she smiled broadly. The conversation resumed and we took our place at the table.

The rest of the evening was just as delightful as the beginning, though I remained in a bit of a daze the entire time. I couldn’t help mentally racing ahead and planning a date we’d agreed we’d discuss later. Fortunately, I managed to not stick my foot in my mouth before the evening finally came to a close.

Finally, Denise and Debbie said it was time for them to head home.

“I’ll go with you,” Len piped up.

I was about to offer to walk them across campus too, but then caught myself. Len wasn’t thinking about their safety on the walk.

“You okay with heading back by yourself?” he asked.

“Yeah ... just buy them a good breakfast,” I teased.

Denise giggled and Debbie smiled at me.

Then Britt gave me a friendly kiss on the cheek. It promised everything and nothing at the same time.

The four of us who didn’t live there headed out at the same time. After walking together for a couple of blocks, we split up with Len and the D&D twins heading east across campus while I continued north. I felt a pang of envy as I watched them walk off, chattering and laughing. But then I caught myself.

I had a date.

I woke up late, hard, and delightfully alone. I was pretty confident that Len wouldn’t be back soon, but I still slipped out of bed and put a rubber band over the knob. Then I grabbed my Playboy. As I flipped through the pages, I grimaced. I needed to get a new one. It wasn’t that the blonde centerfold was getting old, but ... looking at her was getting old. Yeah, I could use her to call up the memories of Lori’s naked body since they were similar, but...

It wasn’t too late in the morning. I could probably slip down to Barnes & Noble and buy another and be back before Len was. On a whim, I decided to go do it right away.

The nerves hit even before I got to Barnes & Noble.

I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was eighteen. I could legally buy a Playboy. Just because I’d never done it, didn’t mean I couldn’t. After all, I’d found the nerve to buy condoms in Colorado Springs and, given how religious that town was, I’d been shocked that the clerk ringing me up hadn’t at least given me the dirty eye.

But I was wired the whole walk down the hill from campus. I felt like I’d drunk six cups of coffee instead of one. I couldn’t keep my arms still and I kept rubbing my fingers together. Sweat started to bead on my forehead despite it being a coolish fall morning.

Thankfully, the store itself was pretty deserted. Even better, I didn’t see any college students. There was a mom with an elementary-aged kid and a couple of older guys. Most of them were clearly browsing and none were near the magazine rack. Still, I circled twice and made sure none of the other customers were likely to be near the magazines when I was.

So after all that, I approached the small section with the men’s magazines on the top rack in clear plastic and froze.

Barnes & Noble didn’t just carry Playboy. They had other adult magazines as well.

Did I want the Playboy?

The cover had a woman peeking out from some fabric. You couldn’t see her body. At least the Penthouse cover had a woman, even if she was wearing a weird hard hat.

I grabbed the Penthouse and hurried to the checkout counter.

The clerk looked bored. He wasn’t much older than me, but he scanned the magazine and slid it into the black plastic bag, which was thankfully not transparent. No one would know what magazine I’d bought.

It was a little bit of a letdown how easily that had gone. He’d sold it to me like it was nothing.

I started breathing normally on the walk back to the dorm.

I entered our dorm room to find Len laying on his bed reading a book. I froze. I really hadn’t expected him for another two hours. Then I quickly whipped the bag with the Penthouse behind my back to hide it. His eyes rose as he saw me do it and I realized I’d been stupid. I brought the bag back in front and tried to be nonchalant but it was too late.

“Playboy?” he asked.

“No, of course not.”

“Oh, so a Penthouse?”

I stared at him. Geez, was it that obvious? But then, trying to hide the bag and then not hide the bag gave it away.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “It’s cool.” He raised his book and started reading again.

I casually slid the bag into my desk drawer. I could hide the magazine later. As I was taking off my windbreaker.

“Oh,” Len said. “I forgot. Liz wants to go to the Video Station.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Apparently the biggest video rental store in the state. And it’s here in Boulder.”

I grinned. “Well, let’s go then!”

We showed up at Liz’s room and she offered to drive since it was just far enough she didn’t want to walk. Neither Len nor I were going to turn that offer down. She grabbed her keys and fifteen minutes later we strolled through the Pearly Gates. Len and I took one quick look around and then turned to each other.

“Oh. My. God,” I said.

“Hell, yeah,” he replied.

I could barely keep my eyes in their sockets. I wanted to look everywhere all at once.

Dramas. Comedies. Action. Horror. Science Fiction. Foreign. VHS and Betamax both. Foreign films. French. Italian. Russian. Japanese. Even an entire shelf of films from South America!

I somehow drifted into the Classics section. Every film Hitchcock had ever directed. Most of Billy Wilder’s work. Even a dozen Abbot and Costellos!

I tried not to drool. I did. And not for the first time, I considered changing my major to film studies.

I didn’t want to sound blasphemous, but I’d found Heaven.

I skimmed the first set of shelves from ceiling to floor and then realized Classics continued around the corner. There was too much. I needed to be more methodical if I was going to wrap my mind around all the golden treasures I’d discovered.

Howard Hawks. John Ford. Fritz Lang. Capra. A dozen films staring Bogart, some of which I’d never heard of before. After a while of looking on the lower shelves, my legs began to cramp so I just sat on the floor.