Chapter 2

Once Jenny was done with rehab, she went through all the stages of grief. She had suffered a profound loss and life-changing injuries.

All her dreams had been crushed along with her legs.

She’d be the girl in the wheelchair for the rest of her life.

Jenny had been part of the gymnastics team, when she was in high school. She even had accepted a scholarship to study at Seattle Pacific University. Her future looked bright – until the car accident changed everything.

She had to relearn how to do many things from a wheelchair. She never anticipated the paralyzing fear she felt, when she forced her body to perform relatively simple tasks, like taking a shower or going to the toilet.

She got a lot of support and love from her family, especially from Kara, but nobody told her how frustrating it would be to be reliant on others. She was pampered by her overprotective parents. Truth was, she depended on them for many things as to help move her from her chair to the backseat of a car so she could attend doctor appointments or rehab.

One day, Jenny and Kara were at Starbucks. Jenny ordered tea for both of them, and the barista tried to confirm the order with Kara. Her sister just pointed at Jenny and said, “Talk to her, you idiot! She’s the one who is ordering.”

Once they were at their table, Kara asked Jenny, “Why do people keep talking to me, and not you?”

Jenny just looked at her sister and said, “You are so naive. It’s the chair.”

Kara’s eyes went big and she exclaimed, “Are you serious?” She couldn’t believe that a set of wheels could make people ignore her sister.

Jenny learned quickly that people were acutely uncomfortable when faced with illness, injury, or incapacity. People mostly ignored or pretended not to notice her. They couldn’t help it. To alleviate the discomfort they looked away and then rendered themselves more uncomfortable because they knew this wasn’t an appropriate action either.

Harry Potter had a cloak that rendered him invisible. Now, Jenny rolled around in the Chair of Invisibility. It appeared that once she sat in her wheelchair, she was no longer visible to other human beings.

All her friends from high school had moved on with their lives, leaving the handicapped girl behind. It was time for her to move on, too.

Jenny decided to go to college and became a high school teacher. Luckily, her younger sister attended the same college as her.

College was a lonely experience, even when Kara and Jenny rented an apartment to be together. She felt ignored and isolated again by her peers. She also faced many accessibility challenges. Kara was there for her, but she had her own classes to attend and her own social life to lead. So, Jenny was reluctant to rely heavily on her to help her.

Jenny found the expectation to fit into university nightlife culture to be a lonely experience. ‘Most of the nights she was on her own because she physically couldn’t do what her friends were doing.

The good thing was that, away from her parents, she learned to do things by herself, like to get in or out of the wheelchair by herself. The independence associated with that skill was astronomical. No longer did she have to buzz for Kara to help her out of bed, or to wait for her assistance to get into a car after a class. She could do it all by herself. She could even go to the bathroom by herself.

She felt so incredibly relieved when she got her degree.

When Jenny returned home from college, she couldn’t go back to the way things had been with her parents. She was an independent person now; she would never let others perform any task for her, if she could do it herself.

Both sisters decided to live together in a one-level house, in which they installed ramps for wheelchair access.

Moving out of their house was Jenny’s attempt to regain privacy and hide from her overbearing parents.

With a college teaching degree now under her belt, she found a job at Middletown High. Mr. Livingston, the school’s principal, welcomed her with open arms.

“Disabled teachers are an essential resource. They are role models for disabled pupils, and help to prepare all students for life in a diverse society,” he told her.

Thing was, Jenny never wanted to be a role model. It made her uncomfortable.

Jenny got nothing but support from her colleagues and students. However, they couldn’t avoid the pitying looks when they watched her move her chair along.

A disabled person was seen as a pitiful person in our society. When she laughed, she used to overhear other teachers saying, “How nice she is laughing despite...”

Her social life wasn’t going anywhere, either. Her disability made people shy away from asking her to join them, for fear of making her feel uncomfortable or pressured. No one wanted to make the ‘disabled girl’ say, “No, I can’t do that.” When Jenny was not invited because people worried about how it would make her feel, she felt even worse and more disabled.

She would rather be allowed to say, “No, I can’t,” than miss the chance to participate.

So, at school, Jenny preferred to stay away from everyone. She’d have the kitchen make her a sandwich before lunch recess so she could enjoy being out there with the kids watching them play. All she could think of was if she ever would be able to have a family of her own.

One of Jenny’s biggest fears was remaining single for the remainder of her life. In daily life, she pretended to be independent and confident, but it was all a lie. Her self-esteem had taken a beating when it came to anything dealing with dating.