Chapter 52: Vee

From that day forward, I made a lot of positive changes in my life. And I felt satisfied with the decisions I had made. I started to move in different circles, more focused on advertising and fashion, and I only accepted one role in an independent film.

I stayed clean from then on. I started eating healthy food and exercising.

Parties no longer appealed to me. I didn’t take calls from those who only wanted to see Raven Black hit rock bottom after a few drinks and some ecstasy.

My idea of a great night was a couple of glasses of fine wine at dinner, an interesting conversation, and not waking up the next day with a hangover and a strange man in my bed. As a matter of fact, I stopped having sex at all.

I never saw Raven Black as something eternal, but rather ephemeral, like so many other celebrities whose fame fades overnight.

We were just puppets in an industry that was used to burning stars. After all, I was not a good actress. I had only known how to exploit my strengths while hiding my weaknesses, or using them to my advantage. I had accumulated enough money to be able to do what I wanted without having to worry about the future for the rest of my life.

Could I have been more greedy and managed to have a longer career? Maybe I could have, but that was never my goal. My purpose was to prove to the world, and above all to myself, that I could achieve what I wanted, that I was more than a poor girl dreaming in a rundown house with an alcoholic father.

My next step surprised everyone.

“Please, don’t bring me any more contracts, Scott. Not more movies, not more advertisement campaigns. As soon as I’m done with my current commitments, I’m retiring,” I announced.

“Are you crazy?” Scott exclaimed.

“You know I am,” I laughed. “But I’m also serious.”

“You’re going back to him, aren’t you?” Scott asked me, with a smile on his face.

I blinked and felt Scott’s hand touching my cheek.

“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I replied, looking away.

His laugh was thunderous.

“You can fool everyone, but you can’t fool a fooler, Vee,” he said.

I nodded, because he was absolutely right.

I thought about Yaron all the time.

“I try to imagine him here, in L.A., but I can’t. I try to see him in every place I go, and he never fits in. I can only see him in Seattle ... with me. He has become my new dream.”

“There’s only one life, Vee, and you have to make the most of it,” he winked at me, and I gave him a tired smile.

“Isn’t that what I’ve been doing?” I asked.

He shook his head. “No, Vee, when I knew you, you were a girl on a mission. You wanted to conquer the world by any means necessary. You were a shining star waiting to be discovered,” he explained.

I nodded slowly.

“But then, somehow, you lost yourself in the process, and your light started to fade,” he continued.