Chapter 7

Old Jokes 1950’s, 60’s Style Part Five by Jon Eugene

I did not write these. I found them in a drawer after my father passed away, so don’t flame me, OK?

1. Did you ever stop to think that if the Pilgrims had shot bobcats instead of

turkeys for food, we’d be eating pussy for Thanksgiving?!

2. Hear about the porcupine that bent his quill? Tried to overpower a wire brush in a dark corner!

3. A sardine is a little fish that smells like a finger.

4. The man stopped his car and said to the girl hitchhiker, “If I give you a ride, what’s in it for me?” She said, “Dust. I’ve been walking all day.”

5. The kid ran out of the burlesque show (remember them? If you do ... well, your grandchildren are right: you’re older than dirt!). The doorman grabbed him and asked him what the matter was? The kid said, “My Mama told me if I ever looked at anything bad, I’d turn to stone, and I can feel it starting!

6. She used Zest (see the comment in the previous joke!) tooth powder in her douche bag, because Zest advertises that it reduces cavities by 42%!

7. People who live in glass houses might as well – everybody knows what they do!

8. Do you know why the lumber truck stopped? To let the lumber jack off.

9. When the papa bee stung the mama bee, she had a little bumble from heaven.

10. Know the difference between a teacup and a peecup? A peecup is what a Mexican rides to work in! (Oh, come on! That’s cute!)

11. “Remember me?” said one little twin to another. “I used to be your womb-mate.” (Read it slowly – it’ll come to you, sooner or later)