Chapter 2? Options

When I mentioned my situation to a guy I knew from on-line that I talked to a lot (he’s not on my website anywhere so don’t bother looking), he had three suggestions for me in an email that soon followed out chat...

Dear Kelly,

After thinking about your situation with Mr. Eisenberg, I had an idea - why don’t you talk to your father about it? He is a lawyer, right? So he could advise you as to what sort of legal grounds you may have to do something about it. Plus, since he loves you, he will understand the predicament that has occurred and not be judgmental of you in any way. As I see it, your choices are:

1. Try to make him stop through threats of legal action. In my mind this is the best choice but also the riskiest. 2. Try to make the best of it until you can get another job - in doing that, you can keep making excuses as to why you can’t do it with him that often and/or make it as unenjoyable for him as possible. 3. Tell him you don’t mind doing it with him as long as he doesn’t threaten you with your job (like you said that’s how you felt), In my mind, this is the worst choice ... it seems to me to be very contrary to so much you have told me about your beliefs.

I’m here to help you with this however I can Kelly.

Although I had thought pretty much along the same lines at first, I had to reject all three options. The first, threaten him with legal action, would have certainly worked but would also have dragged in lawyers and investigators who would be sure to make my past sexual history a part of the case and who knows how deep they might be able to go. It was way too risky.

The second choice would have worked great - IF I only a few months to go before the year was over but I now face an entire school year so there’s no way I could stall him off that long. All he would have to do is file an unsatisfactory job performance review and I would be history - as well as blacklisting me from every other school in the future.

The last choice I actually seriously considered for quite a while. It would’ve been relatively easy, just give in to him the same way I’d done so far. When the school year was coming to an end, I could always apply for another job and leave no worse for wear. Besides, it wasn’t like I didn’t enjoy him fucking me. If I could somehow cast aside my principles for just six to nine months, I could probably have some good times while keeping my job intact.

Well, in the end I decided I couldn’t do it. I may not be perfect and I know there are times when I act counter to the things I claim to believe in but who’s perfect? There’s a difference, though, in doing something “wrong” out of a moment of weakness or lust and doing that same thing in a premeditated way that you had time to think about and make an informed decision. Until this situation with Mr. Eisenberg had developed, I had never taken the easy way out by using sex and this was no time to start. There HAD to be a way out of this without becoming a total hypocrite.

Maybe it was a sign as the answer came to me in church. The sermon was boring, as usual, and my mind was drifting off thinking about my situation with Mr. Eisenberg. It didn’t help that my dad hadn’t been feeling good this morning so I didn’t get my usual Sunday morning fuck before church. Needless to say, I was pretty horny sitting in the pew next to my cousin and Aunt Linda. As usual, I’d left my panties at home and with my legs crossed I was feeling a bit itchy down there between them.

Since I’d been fucked by Mr. Eisenberg a couple of days before it had been this way - alternating between being horny as hell and totally disgusted with myself. Right now I was at the “horny” end of the spectrum and it was all I could do to keep from putting my hand between my legs and masturbate. Not that I’d never done it in church but it was at times when I could be a little more discreet about it.