Chapter 13

My mother doesn’t let me think too much, but how can I not think too much?

Everyone’s growth is different, but unforgettable. For example, my most memorable memory is that my father often went out to do business, and only my mother stayed at home with me. When I was sick, she would take me to the doctor alone, and when it rained, she would bring me an umbrella at school, so my relationship with my mother has always been better than that with my father. This is not necessarily an exception. Most Chinese people should be the same. So in the case of my mother and I, from attachment to her to affection, there may be many families like this.

As we grow older, during those days of adolescence, we all have a thought. Sexual development makes us restless, and we focus more on women. Those flashing images of female stars showing thighs and cleavage on TV, and the situation in reality that women’s underwear always flashes inadvertently under their increasingly short skirts, always make our bodies hot and our hearts pounding. So in fantasy again and again, we learned to masturbate, close the door at home behind our mothers’ backs, and secretly sow our offspring.

It was also at that time that I began to notice my mother. She was a beautiful and charming woman. She would wear skirts and thin pajamas at night. Sometimes I would even see her wearing only underwear. Every time this happened, I would blush and my heart would beat fast, until I finally consciously looked for spring scenery on her. Living together as a family, there were still many such opportunities. For example, in the dead of night, I would secretly get up and look around for my mother’s changed underwear and panties, and then I couldn’t wait to bring them back to the room. While sniffing the smell left on my mother’s underwear, I kept stroking my penis, but I never dared to ejaculate on them...

This kind of thing can only be thought about. In reality, I have no way. I can’t just tell my mother that I want to do it with you again, just as a reward for my son to study abroad. I still don’t dare to speak up.

Before going abroad, at my mother’s suggestion, I went to the countryside with her to visit my grandfather and aunt. My mother’s hometown is in Shucheng County, where there is a place called Wanfo Lake. Yes, my mother grew up by the water. So she has the big watery eyes, double eyelids, fair skin, spiritual charm, and gentleness like water that are common in women in water towns.

My mother’s family is made up of four people. I remember that my grandmother passed away when I was very young. So only my aunt and grandpa are left. My aunt is two years younger than my mother, and she also has a nice name, Hua Yuanyuan. My aunt married a civil servant in the county, and she has a cousin who is three years younger than me.

Hearing that we came from Hefei, my aunt brought my cousin to my grandfather’s side early. My grandfather was a man of some culture in his early years. He had a strong scholarly air, which was in line with the characteristics of his time. After retiring from the Cultural Bureau, he liked to return to the life by the lake in the countryside. It is said that this is the place where he and my grandmother had a love affair, so the old lady liked the environment here, and my mother and aunt did not stop it.

There is a two-story building by the lake, living by the water. My grandfather’s daily life is mostly fishing, planting trees and flowers, and drinking tea.

In his leisurely life, grandpa is optimistic, so he has always been in good health, and he has no shortage of friends and guests. Although it is not in the mountains, it is really a good place to escape from the world. I can’t help but think of myself. I must find such a place to live when I am old.

My cousin has just entered the first year of high school, and she has grown up to be a beautiful girl. She has completely inherited the conditions of the woman. You can tell at a glance that she will be a great beauty in the future. My aunt and mother are sisters. They are both the most beautiful women in their hometown. Although they are not twins, they look very similar, especially their temperament and the voices they speak are very similar. I remember that there were many times when I was a child. Whenever she came to my house to talk, I felt like I was listening to my mother talking. Only when I grew up could I barely tell them apart. If it were a stranger, it would be almost completely indistinguishable.

Back to the real home, the two beautiful women are no longer wives and mothers in front of others. They are daughters and big girls. They cook for the family and prepare a rich table of meals. It’s not often that we can get together like this. Grandpa was so happy that he even took out the wine he brewed.

Everyone poured a glass. My cousin was reluctant to drink it at first, but Grandpa said it had the effect of beauty, so she drank it. As for my mother and aunt, they must have grown up drinking it since they were young. Of course, they have long been accustomed to the taste. They were happy to drink a little with nostalgia.

The most indispensable topic at the dinner table was my family. It was impossible for my mother to hide such a big thing as divorce from Grandpa and aunt, so they naturally scolded my father for a while.

“When you got married, your mother asked someone to tell your fortune. At that time, the old man was already over 90 years old. He said that you were destined to have a love affair and that your marriage would not be smooth. At that time, Li Lanxing looked like a safe child, so we didn’t believe anyone. Until the old man died ten years later, your family was still living a happy life. So, thinking that people would always get confused when they get old, we saved face and didn’t publicize that he was a swindler. But unexpectedly, ten years later, he really got it right...” Grandpa sipped the wine and continued in a tone that he saw through the world at his age, “But you don’t have to be too sad, the eldest daughter. The fortune-teller also said that your next marriage is your destiny. Your karma and blessings are all in the next person. You just need to accept it calmly...”

Oh, I was shocked. I didn’t expect there was such a thing. My mother never told me. I couldn’t help but be curious and even stopped the chopsticks in my hand.

“Dad!” Seeing that I opened my ears and seemed to be listening carefully, my mother seemed very embarrassed and a little nervous. It was not good for a mother to say such things in front of her son, so she said something coquettishly in front of grandpa, expressing her dissatisfaction like a spoiled child.

Seeing that my mother rushed at him, grandpa also came back to his senses and smiled again and again, “Okay, I forgot that my grandson is still here. I’m drunk, so I won’t say anything.” Then grandpa just continued to drink.

After grandpa finished speaking, it was my aunt who started to fire. She scolded my dad and brought up some old accounts that seemed insignificant at ordinary times. She probably felt sorry and unworthy for my mother, and kept scolding my dad for not knowing how to cherish and being a worthless person.

If an outsider said this, I might have said a few more words back. After all, even if my dad should never say it, he couldn’t keep saying it in front of his son. But now in front of my mother, they are all elders, and my dad was really not authentic this time, so I didn’t say a word and let my aunt continue.

But my aunt went off the topic and praised my mother. She also suggested that my mother should find another important one while she was still young. She also said that as long as my mother was willing, she could introduce someone she knew to her. Then she started to introduce someone from her unit ... She instigated my mother to marry someone else. I was so angry that I thought to myself, “Fuck you, aunt, are those people you mentioned reliable? I think you should stop thinking too much. My mother still has me. Why would you marry someone? What if you get cheated?”