Chapter 1: Innocent Enough

Our annual holiday: the family trip down to some beach town in the south. Nothing special, nothing exciting. I sat in the back seat of the car, watching the sun-drenched landscape blur by, the heat of the afternoon sun warming my cheek through the window. My younger brother, Matti, slept beside me, his cheek pressed against the glass, his body contorted awkwardly as he bounced with each bump in the road. I couldn’t help but feel a flicker of amusement at his slumped form, but each time I noticed the subtle shift of his muscles beneath his clothes, my breath hitched. He had grown up faster than I’d realized, his lean form stretched out, no longer the awkward kid I remembered.

I shook my head, forcing myself to look away, trying to ignore the strange, intrusive thoughts that simmered just below the surface. They were new, unsettling, something I hadn’t felt before. As we pulled into the driveway of the rented beach house, I pushed those feelings down, masking them with the familiar hustle of unpacking and settling in. My parents moved around us, issuing commands, and Matti and I fell into a rhythm, exchanging exasperated looks and quiet laughs as we hauled the bags inside. This place, this shift in routine—it was like something was stirring inside me, something I couldn’t quite name.

We made our way to the beach, the scent of salt and sunscreen filling the air as the Mediterranean sun beat down relentlessly. I laid out a towel beside my mum, the heat of the sand radiating through the thin fabric, making my skin feel slick and shiny. The sound of the waves crashing nearby was a constant, soothing rhythm, but my mind was restless. I stood up, brushing sand from my legs, and in my peripheral vision, I caught sight of Matti watching me, his gaze flickering away quickly, his cheeks tinged pink.

A flutter of excitement coursed through me—brief, electric, and dangerous. There was something about the way he looked at me, something that made my pulse quicken. I pretended not to notice, but an idea began to take shape, something reckless and thrilling, bubbling up from a part of me I didn’t know existed.

With a mischievous smile, I slipped on my sunglasses and lay on my belly, letting the sun warm the curve of my back, my hips swaying slightly as I adjusted. Through the tinted lenses, I watched Matti, pretending to be lost in my book. I wiggled my hips, my movements slow and deliberate, feeling the fabric of my bikini bottom tug against my skin. I could see him watching, trying to be discreet, his eyes darting back to his phone whenever I shifted. His carefulness was endearing, almost innocent, but the thrill it sent through me was anything but.

I pushed up onto my elbows, letting my breast sway gently, my movements languid and feline, as though stretching out under the sun. Each motion was calculated, a subtle performance just for him. It felt wrong, and yet, it felt exhilarating. My breath caught in my throat as I relished his gaze, hidden beneath his baseball cap, darting nervously back and forth. He thought he was being sneaky, but I knew exactly what I was doing, and the power of it—the control—was intoxicating.