Chapter 5: After Celebrations

Of course the girls loved the penthouse suite that was a virtual mirror copy of my place. They soon selected their own bedrooms and went downstairs in the lift to the manager’s flat to prepare themselves for the evening, starting with dinner at a Thameside restaurant I’d booked and then back to the club for dancing.

I was going to leave Kay-Lynn at my flat to get ready while I took the bus back to Wandsworth but she insisted on coming with me, and then once we were in the bus she wanted to speak about my reaction to what Monty had said while I drove.

Of course I had been thinking about it even with all the distractions of being surrounded by five happy women, even though I did catch Kay-Lynn looking at me with a slightly worried look all the while I was appearing to be so cheerful for the ladies. She sensed that I was scared shitless because I really was scared shitless.

I was going to be a father, which is the ‘good news’ in Monty’s twisted sense of humour, but I was also going to be a mother, in the worst possible way that I could ever have imagined. I had two tiny babies growing inside me when such a thing was to me, as well as biological science knowledge, supposedly impossible.

“How do you really feel, Drew?” Kay-Lynn asked quietly as soon as as I pulled the otherwise empty minibus away from the kerb and headed for the King’s Road where I’d head south west towards Wandsworth Bridge. “I know that you were acting like your usual charming and upbeat self this afternoon but I think we need to talk about this while we’re alone and not let it fester until we’re too tired to talk tonight ... just know that you’ve got me with you all the way to the final result with this and I know, I’m positive that it is all going to work out fine for you and the babies. I confident that you have the strength to do this and the will and determination to get this done and I also trust Monty to do his bit, so you are not alone, Drew, not by a long chalk.”

I actually chuckled, “it is funny, though, and you’ve got to agree with me that this thing, this absurd turn for me, a singularly single man, who thought that he was firmly settled in the bachelor life without a single dependant to worry about, as rich as fuck, got everything going for me in an uncomplicated almost ideal life, and karma conjures up a fucking womb from nowhere inside me and somehow I self-fertilise my own eggs, which means I must also have ovaries and fallopian tubes somewhere in my guts but blessed Mother Nature has left me with no vagina to exit my incubation chamber and not even my own personal g-spot to play with. And to cap it all, karma, god or the devil, who knows who, makes that vagina a blooming cul-de-sac, so that the only way I can give birth to these twins is via a c-section across my stomach. Ms Karma must make her own Christmas crackers because this one has gone off with a big bang. It is a nightmare! I mean, what do I tell my mother and father?”

“Tell your mother she’s gonna be grandmother to a couple of beautiful and grateful kids who will grow up and make you a proud ... parent.” Kay-Lynn said back with passion, “the same goes with your dad. You are gonna be a great dad, Dad, I just know it, but you are also going to have a support group, people you can trust who will keep this pregnancy a secret so you can get through this with minimal outside interference and allow the children to grow up without the pressure of being celebrities. Now, I know you really looked as though you had switched off during Monty’s reveal, but from what you’ve just said you clearly picked up some of it. Now, ask me about anything you are not sure off and in particular what worries you most about what is going to happen to you. But first thing you have to think about has to be the first decision, Drew, that only you can make and that is fundamental to what happens next. Do you want these babies to be born?”

“Yes, of course I do ... and that is not just gut reaction, I’ve thought about it and I’ve decided that I cannot kill them. I can’t. I mean, my first thought through my head when I heard the news was unthinkable, it was ‘No! I can’t possibly give birth to these babies! They’ve got to go!’ But of course as soon as I thought that thought I had to dispel it. I can’t get rid of them. I may have set out to be end of my hereditary line, I had accepted that preference long ago, but when push comes to shove I just couldn’t abort them. I may lose them naturally, that happens all the time with ‘normal’ mothers, so my babies are another magnitude of precarious away. Look at what my mother went through and I didn’t even know anything about it.

“I had always shunned the thought of living with someone else who was dependent upon me, I wouldn’t have wanted to impose that on anyone ... I’ve been alone a lot throughout my life, having busy parents, both important judges, Lord and Lady Justices, no less, so I was alone a lot as a child, no siblings that I was even aware off and have always been happy with my own company. I thought I was complete but this development with my body has rather thrown me. I want to see them and want to bring them up, and do that with a lot more interaction than I ever had or even sought as a child myself.”

“I told Monty that when you got over the shock you wouldn’t want to abort them. He squeezed my hand and said he was also sure that you’d be on board and told me that while you may think you already have it all, that pretty soon you’d get around to realising that all the material things that you never deep down felt anything about will be nothing compared to those two miracles that are growing inside you.”

“I suppose we do need to sit down and sort out who is and who isn’t going to be part of my support group.” I admitted, “Some of my friends may be great companions but a keeper of my secrets until some point where such secrecy is impossible, those need to be kept in the dark. My mother, yes, she needs to know and I think I’ll go see her tomorrow, this sort of thing isn’t something to do over the phone.”

“Does she live far away?” Kay-Lynn asked.

“Hertfordshire, in the Chiltonian Hills, so not too far from London, about 45 minutes’ drive. If you are up to coming with me we could still be back in time for your first of the series of night shifts you’re on. I’m sure she’ll enjoy meeting you as the first girlfriend I’ve brought home.”

“Oh my god, that’ll be a double shock for her, then,” she said, “Will she be pleased or do you think she’ll scratch my eyes out?”

“She’ll love you more than she does me! In fact, give us nine months’ time and I’ll be the fourth in line in Mum’s pecking order,” I laughed.

“I don’t know about that but I’m so pleased you seem to be taking this so well, Drew,” she sounded cheerful but then added, “tell me what feelings you’re hiding ... if you need any reassurance, I’ll be here to help with advice and a cuddle, I even know where you keep your kettle.”

“It should be all right then,” I replied, “no worries.”

“Of course it will be alright, Drew, nature will take its course but you have people who can lend nature a helping hand and Monty has said that he will shelve his retirement plans and stay on, and he’ll ensure that the people at the surgery don’t know what is going on for as long as possible.”

“I know, I’ve known and respected Monty all my life,” I said, “And I seem to recall he was heavily involving you in this?”

“Yes, Monty has registered me as a private patient of his at the surgery and therefore all the blood tests and ultrascan records that are carried out on you are going to go on my private practice medical records. Monty will keep these separate from my NHS medical records to avoid accusations of false recording if it all goes public. It does mean that I’ll probably have to wear a ‘fat suit’ when we come to the surgery for check-ups later in the pregnancy so that I am the one side of the couple who looks pregnant and you will have to get a bigger coat and just look as though you are putting on a bit of ‘partner sympathy’ weight. He is also pulling back just a small number of patients that he was going to hand over to the other doctors in the practice, just so that he can come into work on the odd day in the week that he sees us and still have a few other appointments to make his day a little more worthwhile but his workload would be maintained light enough to be available for any emergencies along the way. Monty’s given me his private mobile number and he’s told me to ring him if anything unexpected changes or if expected changes occur sooner than predicted.”

“Well, you’ve got the next few appointments sorted out, haven’t you?”

“Yes, the first one is on Monday early afternoon. I finish my Sunday night shift at 8 in the morning, I’ll get home about 9 and sleep until 1pm to we can get to the 2pm appointment on time. Monty stressed how important it is that we both go together.”

“I can pick you up at St Thomas’ at 8 in the morning,” I said, “I have a small electric car that I use around London, so I can get you home more quickly, and that will get you a half an hour extra sleep which might make all the difference.”

“Oh, thanks, Drew, that’s sweet of you. Will you be cuddling me to sleep in the morning?”

“Of course I will, It’s the least I can do,” I said, as we crossed the river via the Wandsworth Bridge. “In fact, I am really surprised you want to be involved with my little genetic issue. If it was me on the other foot, I would expect to run away to the distant hills as soon as I could.”

“I don’t know if you would really do that, after all you didn’t ignore the attack by that shithead and his friends who wanted to drug us, and you’ve been brilliantly supportive of me and all of my friends ever since. What you’ve done for them today regarding the flat is well, absolutely amazing. You have got a fan club that will want to look after you forever, Drew, they worship you because they think you are one hell of a special person, and that includes me.”

I reached across the gear stick and squeezed her hand for a few moments until we cleared the bridge and I had to use both hands and the gears to negotiate twists and turns and roundabouts in the road.

“You know, Monty’s plan for your pregnancy is quite simple, Drew,” she continued. “We both need to turn up together to consultations at the surgery. Monty will see us together alone in his treatment room. We won’t have to go to Lamaze classes because you are not going to go into labour because you do not have a birth canal, but between us as potential Mommy and Daddy, I will advise you on what nutrition and what exercises you are going to need as well as apply treatments for skin stretch mark reduction and anything else you need to relieve any discomfort you might experience. Together we will be presented with the results of the tests over the next few visits. After that, you will take any further tests as needed and those samples will be processed through the labs as if they have come from me. In fact, Monty is expecting me to carry out many of your tests under his supervision as part of my training. It’s too good an opportunity for me to miss. Monty will track your progress pretty well on a weekly basis, if necessary he will visit is at your flat on one of the three or four days a week that he will not be working at the surgery. As I think you heard him say, we cannot see what your biology is doing or what’s going on by XRay because that radiation will damage the babies and, although a quick Cat scan of the affected area would be safe and very useful, it would have to be done with the direct work of a scanning technician and we want to maintain secrecy for as long as possible. But the ultrascan equipment he has at the surgery is a very new and efficient piece of kit and, as the babies grow, we can record their progress and also get a good idea of what is developing around your uterus. On Monday he will check again with the ultra sound and see if he can pick up where the uterine tubes connect up to the ovaries and take a closer look at the uterus to see if a cervix is forming. Finally, and hopefully, he will be able to identify the gender of the two babies. He thinks you are about ten weeks along, judging by the size and development of the twins, which is already about a quarter of the way through the pregnancy.”