Chapter 10

Journal Entry 6: Friday

After my last entry, I was too emotional to write for a couple of days, reliving that hurtful day. Even now, I fight back the tears.

Chronicling facts as best as I can for my upcoming psychiatric review. As I mentioned in a prior entry, I am currently employed by the CIA. Of course, I am currently at an entry level data analysis. Looking at various messages, emails, texts and etc. Doing translations and then sending the work off, further review, additional analysis, double checking my work, who knows.

After my apparent rescue by the Special Forces Unit and rejected by the Prince, I am doing my best, settling into my surroundings here.

I still think back on my abduction. I see quick little flashes in my mind, but it comes and goes so fast that I am unable to determine what exactly it is. The entire situation is such a mystery. But, that is the story of my life. One big mystery after another. Who are my parents? Why was I abandoned? What happened to me during my abduction? What kind of education was I given to where I can read, write and even speak almost every known language on the planet?

I know the United States Government, put me thru a large amount of examinations. Drug testing, X-rays, MRIs and CAT Scans. All to determine if I am some rouge experiment by another foreign country. I have heard all of the jokes, from being a test-tube baby to being brain-washed/programmed. And in all honesty, I don’t know. They could be true.

Thinking back on my abduction, I remember the medical experts saying that I had not been raped or violated like the other two women. True, I had no bruising or pain, other than my gunshot wound and the knife stabbed into my shoulder. All of which has healed, given the time between then and now.

“How does that make you feel?” I can hear my therapist ask me now. “All of what has happened to you?”

Well, I am saddened by it all. But I think I have heard a motto since coming to the States that I have adopted into my core. I have been this way before I have ever heard it.

“What doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger.”

Throughout all of my struggle, I think I have done fairly well. I have survived and not broken inside. I fight for what is right and fight against what is wrong.

Just got off the phone with my therapist. Seems Monday I am scheduled for a hypnotherapy session to see if there is anyway of unlocking my memories before they finish up my final evaluation. Not sure what they will find, if anything.