Chapter 31

Chloé had been looking forward to today all week. Her roommate, Kendra, had multiple finals this morning, whereas Chloé had none. This meant she had the entire place to herself, without any worry of being annoyed or interrupted. She hadn’t bothered setting an alarm, and got an extra hour of sleep compared to her usual weekdays. After waking up, she grabbed her Switch and happily played a few hours of Hollow Knight without even leaving her bed.

It was much easier to focus without Kendra around. Multiple boss battles had been giving her trouble, but with the dorm peacefully quiet, she finally managed to best them. As much as she wanted to continue playing past those fights, however, she knew there were other matters to attend to.

Specifically, her attention started wavering. Instead of hyper focusing on dodge timing, her eyes kept wandering to the drawer that held her magic wand. It had been nearly a week since she’d last needed it, and she had hormone therapy to thank for that. In the before times, as she liked to call them, her high testosterone had controlled nearly every moment of her life. Constantly thinking about sex, daydreaming about all the naughty things she wanted done to her; it had been practically impossible to focus on anything else.

Now, thankfully, it felt like she controlled her body rather than the other way around. The curse of masculinity had been lifted, and she was free to masturbate only when she wanted to.

And today? She very much wanted to.

She opened the drawer, grabbing her magic wand and stretching the power cord to the outlet behind her bed. Next, she reached between her legs, delicately repositioning her sex until it pointed up towards her bellybutton. The feel of her soft hands excited her, and her breath quickened in anticipation.

She pulled her wand closer, sliding it beneath the sheets, but she didn’t turn it on yet. She wanted to take her time, to enjoy teasing herself before the real fun began. She ran her fingers over her thighs, drawing small circles in her sensitive skin before slowly creeping higher. She was still wearing her panties, they helped keep everything in place, and she playfully traced their edge, pretending she had a lover that was nervous to push further.

Next, her hands moved to her waist, where she hugged herself tight. Her fingernails lightly scratched her sides, and she bit her lip in appreciation of the feeling. Moving higher still, she pushed inside her loose shirt until she found her breasts. They were small, but her transition had made them delightfully sensitive.

Accidentally hitting her chest with a fridge door might not sound like a gender-affirming activity, but for Chloé it had been a moment of revelation. It had hurt like hell, though the pain had subsided when she’d pieced together what the pain meant. She had tits! They were sensitive! Needless to say, she’d shut herself in her room that night for some very excited experimentation.

As her fingers ran over her nipples, her thoughts happily returned to the present. Her body tingled at the feeling, and she spent a minute delicately tracing circles before giving in to temptation. She began to pinch herself, taking great care not to be too rough, and her back arched in appreciation. Her breath caught in her throat, and she even dared to let loose a small moan of pleasure. She lost track of time as she played with her nipples, her legs squeezing the dormant wand between them.

The pressure eventually grew too much, and she moved one hand away from her chest. It traveled down, finding the power button on her magic wand, then pushed it.

Pleasure immediately shot through Chloé’s body. The head of the wand was sitting lower, against the base of her shaft, and the vibrations felt amazing. Though she was more sensitive in other areas, this was the perfect place to begin playing with herself. In its current position, the wand was stimulating her with deep, slow, rumbling movements. Not enough to drive her crazy, but enough to set the stage for the excitement to come.

While one hand continued to pinch and tease her nipples, the other began stroking her shaft. Only light movements, using a couple fingers to carefully massage the top half of her sex.

In the before times, masturbation had been quick, messy, and brutish. There had been no incentive to take her time, or to bother learning about her body; not when she frequently needed to take care of herself multiple times a day. Now, the process felt more akin to making love, and she relished the chance to tenderly coax her pleasure out.

It was finally time for more, she was thoroughly worked up. She stopped massaging herself, then grabbed the wand and pulled it higher. She moaned again, louder, as the soft head of the toy made contact with the soft head of her sex. The sensation was almost too much, and she pushed the wand down an inch. This was the perfect spot, and she repositioned her grip to make sure her excited squirming wouldn’t throw the wand out of position.

Her hips began thrusting, eager to feel the vibrations that coursed through her body. Her offhand, still teasing and pinching her nipples, began to squeeze harder. Almost a little too hard, but now that she was worked up, the intensity felt amazing.

She clicked a button on the wand, and the vibrations doubled in speed. Chloé’s eyes rolled back in her head, and her hips twitched involuntarily from the increased pleasure. Her entire body joined in next, eagerly surfing the vibrations of the wand as the increased intensity took command. Her breath grew ragged, her moans turning into gasps as she begged for release. She danced with the vibrations for nearly a minute before the sensation proved too much for her.

When she came, everything froze. She held her breath, scared to release it and spoil the moment. Her hips stopped thrusting, her thighs squeezed tight as if worried her orgasm might escape before its time. Pleasure raced through her, starting at her sex, then surging through every nerve and fiber in her being. She threw her head back, her back arched, and moaned quietly to herself.

After the initial pleasure, the orgasm continued its rounds, circulating through her body over and over. Her toes curled, her legs bent, her core tensed and released as she continued gasping excitedly.

When she finally released her hold on her breasts, as the orgasm began to fade from her body, she reached further down to tenderly cradle her wand. She clicked a button, and the vibrations quieted somewhat. She kept her eyes closed, focusing on the afterglow of her climax, then slowly worked the wand further down to keep reducing its intensity. Before long, her body had relaxed entirely, her breath was quiet, and she turned the wand off entirely.

Releasing her grip on the toy, she moved her hands to her head and pushed the hair from her eyes. With a deep breath, she stretched her arms out, and sat up.

“Wow. Fuck, I needed that,” Chloé said.

With her head now clear, and the passion gone from her system, she put her wand away and headed for the bathroom to get ready. Within the hour, she was sitting down to take the only final she had scheduled today.

The exam passed quickly enough, and she felt good about her performance. Even better, with the test now over, she was officially halfway through her week. She could spend the rest of today relaxing and, after two more days of finals, winter break would officially begin. As she left Brandt Hall, she thought about what she wanted to do with her long break.

Aurelius University had a fairly generous holiday break, giving students four entire weeks to spend at home with their loved ones. Or, in Chloé’s case, hidden away in her dorm while continually trying to convince her family that she definitely didn’t have a choice to come home for the break.

Chloé had never fit in with her family, even before she discovered she was a woman. They had always made her feel small and insignificant, like her ideas didn’t matter to them. She wasn’t a person with thoughts and opinions, she was an object that needed to do as it was told to maintain the appearance of a happy family. She had taught herself to stay hidden, to bury her feelings out of fear that a neighbor or relative might turn the community against her.

As she grew older, she began to understand how hateful her hometown was. Although they preached love and acceptance, their actions were designed to uphold an existing status quo. Chloé’s growing interest in queer communities, and her desire to give the disenfranchised a helping hand, forced her even deeper into hiding.

College had been a fresh start. A chance to present the real her, a proud trans woman that wanted to organize charity efforts. To this day, she was still amazed at how accepting everyone had been. Her closest friends, Amara, Tessa, and Vee had met their Freshman year in a class designed to help new students acclimate to college life. They’d been enthusiastic about her charity efforts, they’d encouraged her to go out and meet new people, and through them, Chloé had started to develop a sense of pride in her identity.

She wasn’t looking forward to losing them over Winter Break.

Although, they’re barely here now...

The last month or so had been tough for Chloé. Amara and Vee had gotten in a fight over Nick, then Vee had gotten hurt in that house fire. When she returned, she’d still been mad at Amara, and the group was still recovering. Chloé didn’t really understand all the social drama, and she was scared about losing her friends. Her hope was that, after the break, everything would be better.

At the moment, Chloé was walking across the Quad to head back to her dorm. Her train of thought was interrupted by the voice of a stranger speaking up.

“Hi, excuse me? You’re Chloé, right?” the voice said.

Startled, Chloé looked up from the ground and into the big, bright eyes of this new person. She had very dark skin, and her thick, curly hair sat collected atop her head. “Oh, yes, that’s me. I’m sorry, have we met before? I’m bad at remembering faces.”

The stranger smiled and shook her head. “Nope! This is our first time meeting, but we have some mutual friends, and I’ve seen you around a few times. My name’s Naomi!”

Chloé shook Naomi’s hand before quickly putting her own back in her coat pocket. “It’s nice to meet you, Naomi. What friends do we have in common?”

“Mostly Tessa. She and I have hooked up a few times.”

“That certainly sounds like her! Did you, um, need something? I was just on my way home, but you can walk with me if you like.”

“I was actually hoping you could help me out with a project of mine. I’m majoring in Investigative Journalism, and I wanted to write a piece about cult mentality. I’m going around campus interviewing everyone I can to try and piece together how something like this cult gets started, and what drives people to join in.”

“Oh, of course! I’d love to help you out!” Chloé smiled, always eager for a chance to give more students a voice.

“I’ll also be recording this, just a heads up. So, first question: Did you know Brandon Nowak?” Naomi asked. As she started her questioning, she pulled out her phone and clicked a button.

Chloé shook her head. “Doesn’t sound familiar. Was he in the cult?”

Naomi gave her a curious look. “He was, yeah. You really don’t know who he was? At various points the last few months, he was stalking both Amara and Tessa. They never mentioned him?”

“Oh, the stalker! I’d heard about him, but I guess I never caught his name. I only learned about that a few days ago, honestly.”

“Hm. Interesting.” Naomi typed something in her phone, then continued. “Did you know any of the other people involved? Professor Luxnor, Mark Summers, Chris Miller?”

“Sorry, nothing. I’m not the most sociable person and, like I said, I’m bad with faces even when I try.”

“There’s no need to apologize! I’m not looking for anything in particular here. Next question: Have you noticed any odd behavior the last week or so? Ever since this news broke?”

Chloé paused, not fully understanding the question. “Um, no? I thought you were asking about the cult.”

“I’m looking into cult mentality, primarily, but also the effects cults can have in a larger community. What about Amara, Tessa, and Vee, have they been acting any differently recently?”

“Not at all!” Chloé said. “I mean, Amara and Vee are sick and missing all their exams, which sucks. I guess Tessa and Nick have been pretty distracted too, but they’re trying to help Amara and Vee out, plus it’s finals week, so it makes sense that they’d be a little distracted.”

“Have you talked to Amara or Vee recently?”

“I ... no, I haven’t. I’ve been texting them, but they haven’t texted back. But they’re sick! They need to rest, and it’s okay that they’re not responding.”

Naomi paused again, seemingly lost in thought about something. Before Chloé could try to piece together what her face meant, she started talking again. “Alright, this next question is a little odd, so I apologize in advance if I upset you. Do you think there’s a chance they could be hiding anything from you?”

“Absolutely not! We’ve been super close ever since school started last year, and they’re my closest friends!” Chloé was talking much faster now, eager to defend everyone. “Why would you even think that?”

“It’s just, when I started looking into this, Amara’s name came up a few times. She’s been pretty popular recently, so people tend to pay attention to her when she’s around. But, when I was talking to her about the cult, what she told me didn’t make sense compared to everything else I’d heard. Then I talked to Tessa, and the same thing happened. I like to think I’m pretty good at reading people, and they both seemed pretty nervous about something.”

“So, what, you come to me hoping I’ll rat them out?” Chloé caught herself off guard with her comment. She hated being confrontational, but hearing Naomi accuse her friends of lying didn’t sit right with her.

“It’s not like that! I’m just confused, and I’m trying to piece together what’s going on. Plus, after all the media outlets that were here last week, it’s not exactly surprising that people are tired of talking about the cult. Look, I’m probably way off base about this, and I’m sorry I upset you, I really am.”

“My friends are good people, Naomi. Things have been a little tough, yes, but there was some drama between Amara and Vee. I think they’re still trying to work things out, and we’ve all been a little on edge, that’s all.”

“Again, I really didn’t mean anything by it. Look, I’ll let you get back to your day, I’ve got everything I need.” Naomi started to walk away, then briefly paused to look back at Chloé. “Though, if you hear anything, feel free to reach out. I’m always happy to listen.”

With the conversation over, Chloé found herself alone with her thoughts once again. She was upset that Naomi had suggested her friends might be lying to her, and in her bad mood, she didn’t feel like going home anymore. She continued thinking about all of Naomi’s strange questions, and eventually an idea popped into her head. Instead of heading back to her dorm, she switched directions to start walking towards Amara’s apartment.

Thankfully, it was a short walk. There were quite a few apartment blocks close to campus, with Vee and Amara even living on the same street. Within minutes, Chloé found herself in the hallway outside of Amara’s apartment. She raised her hand and knocked quietly, hoping she wasn’t disturbing Amara while she was resting.

A minute passed, then two more. Chloé tried knocking again, louder this time, and called out. “Amara? It’s Chloé, I just wanted to come check on you.”

More silence.

Maybe she’s asleep? Tessa didn’t say what Amara was sick with, I only know it’s the third time this semester. Although, thinking back, she always seems fantastic when I see her. She must bounce back from illnesses really fast.

She knocked a third time “Amara? Are you holding up okay? Is there anything I can get for you?”

Why isn’t she answering? Is she really that sick?

Chloé pulled out her phone, checking her texts. Still nothing from Amara, or from Vee. A small part of her was starting to worry, but she shook her head to dislodge the thought.

No, Tessa and Nick have been helping both of them out. They’re just exhausted from being sick, that’s all.

With a heavy sigh, Chloé walked away from Amara’s apartment and started heading home.

She missed her friends. She missed sleepovers, eating lunch with everybody, and hearing about all their passion projects. The last few days, she’d only been getting lunch with Nick and Tessa, and they’d both seemed incredibly distracted. Almost like they were in a rush to leave. Chloé hated to think it, and she felt bad even entertaining the notion, but a part of her wondered.

Could they be hiding something?

For the second morning in a row, Amara woke up on Vee’s couch. It was, in a way, more strange to be in this house than it was to be in Purgatory. They had known the planes were going to be acting strange, but Vee? The girl that had tried to kill her, then swore that they would never be friends? Now Amara was practically living with her.

Even stranger, Vee had even been somewhat nice these last two days. Yesterday, after the fight with that strange beast, she’d started asking about Amara’s abilities. Was it genuine interest? Or was she just trying to strategize about their escape?

What even was that creature? It passed through walls like a ghost, but I was able to punch it easily enough.

With a groan, Amara stood up and started stretching. She was a little sore from the fight yesterday, and it didn’t help that her wings were cramping from sleeping on the couch. Making sure she was in the middle of the room, she opened her wings as wide as she could and started moving through her standard routine.

She’d been a demon long enough to have a strong understanding of her body, and had designed a series of stretches that helped her wings and tail wake up. The most interesting thing about her demonic limbs, in her opinion, was how flexible they were. After twenty years of living with a standard human body, she’d grown accustomed to limbs that only bent in specific directions. Her tail, in contrast, had full mobility in every direction, and was completely prehensile. Her wings were more limited, likely due to their complex bone structure, but not by much.

She was in the middle of a somewhat elaborate stretch when she heard Vee leave her bedroom. When Amara looked up, she saw Vee standing in the hallway, staring back at her.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Vee said, looking away quickly.

Amara rolled her eyes. “It’s not like I’m masturbating; it’s just stretching. The couch is comfy but hell on my wings.”

There was an awkward pause, then Vee cleared her throat and walked to the kitchen. She rummaged through the fridge, throwing together a makeshift breakfast before sitting at the counter. Amara continued stretching for a few more minutes until everything felt loose and limber, then moved to the kitchen to join Vee.

“So, what’s the plan today?” Amara asked.

“Well, our only real lead is the circle under Lysander Hall. If we assume that Tessa is looking for us, she’s bound to go there eventually, right? We could probably just wait there until we hear something, but then we risk running into that creature again.”

“What if we sought the creature out? If we can figure out why it’s here, what it wants, we might be able to figure out how to avoid it.” Amara took a quick pause to eat, then continued. “I’d say we should try to kill it, but I don’t know if that’s possible. I mean, if it lives in Purgatory, it’s probably already dead, right?”

After a moment of contemplation, Vee spoke up. “I’m not against that, honestly. I’d rather face it out in the open than in another cramped hallway. It’s strange that we both spent an entire day exploring campus, but didn’t find that thing until yesterday.”

“Great! We’ll finish eating, then head out!” Amara went back to shoveling food in her mouth, and soon enough they’d both finished eating.

Vee returned to her room and changed into a new outfit, the new clothes looking even warmer than what she’d worn yesterday. She didn’t bother offering any clothes to Amara this time, and when she was finished, the girls left the apartment.

Amara was growing annoyed at how bland everything was. The campus looked exactly the same as it did yesterday, with absolutely no indicators that time had passed since they had returned home. Her thoughts wandered to stories of spelunkers that spent days underground, returning to the surface to find their circadian rhythms completely disrupted. Would that happen to her? Could there be any more dangerous effects to hopping between planes?

She didn’t particularly want to think about it. She was thrilled that her demonic side protected her from the cold of Purgatory, but there were other side effects of traveling through interplanar portals. She remembered Brandon’s last moments, desperately fighting to avoid falling through a portal, only to have his hand severed when the portal closed on it.

A shiver ran through her body, not from the cold, but from the thought of a portal slicing part of her off.

Eager to think of something else, she returned to something more light-hearted; she was determined to figure out Vee’s name, but was running out of names that began with V.

“Okay, what if it’s something weird?” Amara said.

“What, the creatures? They’re pretty strange already, don’t you think?”

“No, like, all my previous guesses have been normal names, but now that I think about it, you probably wouldn’t be ashamed of your name if it was something normal.”

Vee groaned, clearly annoyed by Amara’s persistence. “Ugh, can you just drop it already?”

“Maybe it’s some strange, new-age thing. What about Vengeance? That would be fitting. Wait! I’ve got it!” Amara ran in front of Vee, stopping her in her tracks as she excitedly kept talking. “Vee for Vendetta!”

Amara expected another frustrated groan, but instead, Vee just looked down at the ground. She was strangely quiet, and when she finally responded, her voice was soft and timid. “Why are you doing this?”

“What? I’m just curious about your name. You could stop this at any time,” Amara said.

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it!” Vee said, her voice growing louder. “Ever since we got here, you’ve been insufferable! You’re horribly rude, you insult me constantly, and you ignore all requests to stop! What is your problem?!”

“I’m sorry, MY problem?!” Amara met Vee’s escalation, and was now yelling back at her. “My problem is that, two months ago, I started turning into a demon with no fucking clue what was happening to me! And then, before I have the slightest idea what’s going on, one of my best friends decides she wants to fucking kill me! No questions, no conversations, just a quick monologue before you’re trying to shove a sword through my heart!”

“I-I didn’t know—”

“You never tried, Vee! And you know what? I was on your side for weeks! Every time Tessa blamed you for that fight, I defended you. I bent over backwards to try and see your side of things, to give you the benefit of the doubt, because I thought you were right. I spent weeks begging for forgiveness, trying to talk to you, and what happens when you return to campus? You insult me, throw me into your wards, and shoot me in the back!”

Amara stepped closer, jamming a finger into Vee’s chest as she kept shouting. “You’re the one that attacked me! You’re the one avoiding me! You’re the one that swore, to my face, that you didn’t want to be friends anymore! You don’t get to turn around now and complain that I’m being rude to you, Vee, because I’m giving you exactly what you asked for!”

“I never said I didn’t want to be friends!” Vee said.

“So now you’re a liar? Or are you just delusional?”

“I said we couldn’t be friends! Not that I didn’t want to be!” Vee paused, breathing heavily as the shouting match came to a sudden halt. They glared at each other briefly before Amara responded, her words quiet with surprise.

“Wait, do you want to be friends, Vee?”

“Of course I do! I miss you, Amara; you were my best friend. I trusted you with everything! When I learned you were lying about so much, it broke me.”

Amara hesitated, trying to process Vee’s words. “Except you were lying too. Were you ever going to tell me you were an angel?” she asked.

“I ... no, I wasn’t. I’ve known I was an angel for as long as I can remember, and the Church told me over and over that I had to keep my identity a secret. If people find out who I am, they stop seeing me as human. I’m suddenly a means to an end; a thing to worship, threaten, and bribe. All they see is what I represent, not who I am.”

Amara’s voice nearly broke as she responded. “Yeah, I wonder what that’s like.”

Vee’s eyes went wide. Her mouth opened, attempting to say something, but no sound left her lips. Amara continued talking instead.

“Yes, I’m angry, Vee. I’m angry at you, I’m angry at that stupid cult, I’m angry at the entire fucking world. Do you know how many people have tried to rape me in the last two months alone? Four! And the last three succeeded because I was hungry! I begged them to do it because I needed them to think they were in control, but I was just using them; they were nothing but prey to me. We’re alive right now because I accepted who I was, I embraced the monster everyone thinks I am.”

Amara’s breathing was starting to slow. This entire conversation had caught her by surprise, and she didn’t fully understand what might happen next.

“I don’t think that anymore, Amara,” Vee whispered.

“Well you should.” Amara looked up, her eyes lingering on Vee’s scars. “I do. Every time I look at you, I’m reminded how easy it is for me to hurt people.”

“What, my scars? I’m the one that almost died, Amara!”

“You think I don’t know that? That I don’t see what’s happening to me?!” Amara hesitated, scared to continue talking. “Something changed the night of the ritual, Vee. Maybe it was the gangbang, or the fight, or being next to an open portal to hell, but it’s so much harder to fight my instincts. When I woke up here and found you, I only remembered that you’d been avoiding me all week. So, I thought, okay, if you want us to be enemies, then fine. I’d rather be that than strangers.”

“That’s really what you thought? That I wanted you to insult and demean me?”

“Wouldn’t it be easier? If I turn out to be a malicious, soul-sucking demon, that means you were right. No complicated moral questions, no begging for forgiveness; you get to sleep peacefully knowing the world makes sense. And ... and I wouldn’t have any of this guilt.” Amara turned away from Vee, staring up into the lifeless Purgatory sky. A tear fell down her cheek, and she quickly burned it away.

“I don’t want to live in that world,” Vee said, stepping closer. “Not if it means giving up on you. I didn’t save your life to settle a score, I did it because I believed you were trying to be better, but now? This isn’t the Amara I saved.”

Amara wasn’t sure what to say. Before she could piece together her thoughts, Vee spoke up again. “You know what? When we found each other in Purgatory, I was honestly a little happy.”

“Happy to what, spend time with me? You’ve been avoiding me ever since the ritual!”

“Yes! I want to see you, but I’m scared, Amara! My powers don’t work like yours; they’re given to me by an angelic Patron. That’s what I meant when I said we couldn’t be friends; Heaven won’t allow it. What happens if my Patron looks down from Heaven and sees us happily eating lunch together? Do I lose my powers? My life? I have no idea!”

“You seriously think Heaven would kill you for eating lunch with me? I thought they were the good guys?”

“It’s not that simple. I was born because my Patron needed another agent on Earth. How do I know that my magic isn’t the only thing keeping me alive?” Vee’s voice wavered, her fear more than obvious.

Listening to Vee’s words, something finally clicked in Amara’s mind.

She’s just as scared and confused as I am.

“Vee, I—”

“LOOK OUT!” Vee shouted, interrupting Amara before immediately tackling her to the ground. Above them, exactly where Amara’s head had been a moment earlier, a massive ghostly jaw snapped shut.

The ground shook as another horrible creature landed a few feet in front of them. Its huge talons dug into the ground, and its skeletal body swung behind it until it faced Vee and Amara directly. It loosed an ear-piercing scream, the multiple discordant voices forcing the girls to cover their ears.

The creature took a step closer, then raised a claw and tried to slash at them. Before the swipe found them, however, Vee had rolled off of Amara, freeing the demon to jump to her feet and manifest her chitinous gauntlets. She grabbed the creature’s claw to block the attack, and while she skidded backwards slightly, she was able to stop the beast’s momentum. Amara grunted, then manifested more chitinous armor around her feet, turning them into sharpened talons of her own. They dug into the ground, and with the extra stability, she was able to push the creature back.