Chapter 4: Fulfilment

We slept apart, even after my tests came back clean. Many times I nearly went to her bed, and then changed my mind at the last moment.

The Saudi regime had reigned in the morality police a little bit, so public socializing between males and females was ok again, at least for non-muslims and foreigners. Nothing was written, we just all got the message; foreigners could date foreigners, Saudi men could date foreign women, Saudi women and girls were off limits.

I dated a Lithuanian air stewardess a few times, Mom went out with an American oil company man, and spent some nights with him too.

“How was it?” I asked her.

“Hmmph. It was good the first time, so-so the second time, and the third night was a total bore.” She told me, “How about you and Jessica?”

“I didn’t follow through.” I admitted.

“Travis, you need to get your dick into a suitable girl, is she nice?”

“Very nice.”

“Good looking I assume?”

“Supermodel level.”

“So what’s the problem? Give her the look.”

“How do you know I didn’t?”

“Because you’d have gone to bed with her if you did.” She said.

That night, after dinner in a restaurant, I looked deep into my date’s eyes. Speckled green, her Slavic face went blank, her mouth fell open in surprise as she stared back.

We went to her apartment and fucked late into the night. I don’t really have much to say about her; she was good fun, good looking, good in bed. We liked each other and might have gotten serious, if she hadn’t pissed off her boss by refusing to fuck him.

She was fired and deported.

“You should ask her to marry you.” Mom insisted, “She’s EU Travis! You could get residency, then citizenship.”

“How can I ask her, when I have nothing? She has to be the one to offer.”

All our money had been going into the Zambian property. Wages for Joseph, tax, And legal fees.

“Are you ok?” Mom asked sympathetically.

“It’s all pretty depressing. And a reminder that it could happen to either of us at any time.”

“Look at me.” She whispered, “Like you used to.”

Her eyes were my eyes. Pale blue, irresistible eyes; we slammed into each other with the force of insane mutual attraction, her sexy body was wrapped around me, our mouths met, clothes came off, her long legs opened and my big cock slid into her sweet wet slot again.

“Oh that’s good.” She sighed, “I know it’s bad, maybe that’s why it’s so good. No one does it to me like you do, Travis. Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!”

And she was in orgasm, her fingers digging into my shoulders, her legs around my ass, her face so pretty, this was really terrible, so bad, but as she said, too good. I came with her.

“Want a blowjob?” she asked excitedly a minute later.

I pulled out and fell onto my back next to her.

“If you do that, I’ll get hard again.” I said, “We have choices now, you have a boyfriend.”

“Hmmph, he’s a nice guy, he just can’t do me like you can.”

I stroked her affectionately as her pretty mouth went up and down on the end of my hard rod, looking into her loving eyes.

The truth was, no one did it to me like she did either. No one was as hungry for me, no one came so hard and fast, no one so eagerly sucked my cock for another round.

We’re not religious, and we seemed to get along just fine together when we were sleeping together and when we weren’t. I didn’t have the financial or legal stability to offer anyone a committed relationship, or make babies. All I had was a janitorial job and mother; even the apartment was owned by the hospital, our low rent was dependent on being employed there.

“Mmmm, Mmmm, Mmmm.” She grunted as her head bobbed up and down my rod. Well, there was no use stopping now. I pulled her face to mine to kiss her as she slide her tight old vagina down my rod to ride me.

Her big loose tits and tangled blond hair bounced above me, we held hands and smiled at each other. It was good; it was beautiful.

My penis throbbed with energy as I relaxed below my heaving mother. Maybe we could just surrender to this, and give up trying to find ‘suitable’ partners. What could anyone give us that was better than each other?

Our relationship was great; we had everything a couple should have. We talked, we trusted, we shared, we loved, and we had satisfying sex.

Mom leaned forward so her tits rested on my breast, I wrapped my finger around her ass, her hair fell around my head and her hands held my face. We just looked at each other, our love was total at that moment. Deep, powerful, tight, throbbing love.

Dating was expensive; with men outnumbering women 2:1 in the expat community, if I asked a good looking woman out (and I only asked good looking women), I had to take her to a decent restaurant, and I had to pick up the check even if she earned more than I did. We were doing ok, Mom and I both worked long hours; still, our money was hard won. It sure was comfortable, and cheap, to just eat and sleep with Mom at home.

She was the one who kept insisting we call it off and find other lovers. Maybe it was the sporadic nature of our affair that kept it fresh and exciting; whatever it was, I rolled my mother onto her back and fucked her late into the night, our bodies clamped together until I came again, and even then we stayed coupled until the alarm went off in the morning and we had to get ready for work.

I got a strange message from Jessica, the Lithuanian stewardess. She said she didn’t know how I’d bamboozled her into bed, but she’d never wanted it really, that she loved her Swedish boyfriend, and not to ever contact her again.

I hadn’t planned to; still, it was hurtful.

About 5 years after Rajesh and Jyoti were married, they made a stopover in Ridha while traveling to India with their boy Hari, for a family vacation.

Mom and I were both a bit surprised that they wanted to see us; we all had dinner at their hotel.

“Don’t you dare look into her eyes.” Mom warned me, “They’re happily married and have two children. Want a blow job before dinner? Shut up and get your trousers off, I want to be sure your balls are empty.”

My mother gave the best blowjobs; Even better than Radha. She liked to do it slow and long, she seemed to take real pleasure from my pleasure.

She’d been with other men; not many, just 3 or 4 during the years. She got all dressed up when they took her out to fancy dinners, she spent some nights away, one bought her jewelry, nice stuff too.

When either of us was dating someone, we stayed in our separate beds. And when neither of us had anyone else, Mother would turn her eyes on me, and I’d stare back, and we had the greatest sex together.

I stroked her blond head affectionately as we looked into each other’s eyes, her pretty face sliding up and down my hard cock easily, with the comfort of familiarity. How many times, how many years had we been doing this? Would we ever find suitable partners, escape the prison we’d sunk into?

We did well financially, yet not well enough to achieve security. Not unless we could get residency somewhere else, in a stable cheap country like India or even Korea. Even when we got clear title to the Zambian property, it wouldn’t sell for enough to set us up.

“Mmmm!” Mom insisted, “Mmmmm!”

I came, she sucked and swallowed. Man, how could I marry any of those girls I dated? Most didn’t suck cock at all, and none did it like this.

“I’m a bit nervous.” Mom admitted as we drove across the city. “How about you?”

“Yeah, I wonder why they called us, after what we did to them.”

“Rajesh isn’t big like you are.” Mom said, “Still, I taught him how to please. His wife should appreciate me for that.”

“I’m sure she does.” I said, I don’t think Mom picked up on the irony though.

The boy was little, 2 years old. Jyoti looked great, especially considering she’d given birth. Raj looked a little tired. I offered my hand, he hugged me instead. I turned to his wife, and there was a moment of hesitation, then she hugged me too. Her breasts were definitely bigger than before.

Hari was jumping around us happily as we caught up. Raj was fascinated by the Zambia property, and insisted we could make a living there growing coffee if we grew premium beans. It was his family business, all his cousins, aunts, and uncles were growing, trading, roasting, and blending the stuff.

Raj and I went out for a walk before dinner, leaving the women to calm down the boy and get him to sleep.

Raj told me that they were basically estranged.

“I love her as a friend, Travis.” He told me, “We both thought we could make it work, we really tried, yet somehow we never really clicked.”

“Shit Raj, I’m sorry.” I said, “Is it my fault?”

“I don’t blame you, all four of us were there that night. That was five years ago, we’ve shared a home and had a baby together, so whatever happened it should have passed by now.”

“It hasn’t?”

“She doesn’t love me.” He said. “I never made her come, Travis. Not once. It’s not just her, it’s both of us. We wanted to love each other the Indian way, it just didn’t happen. We decided to divorce at one point, and even had a trial separation, she wanted to try with someone else and I agreed. I thought that maybe we could both be happy with other people. She came back after a couple of months, we didn’t talk about it again. We share everything, we do love each other in a way, we just don’t sleep together.”

“What about you?” I asked, “Did you go with anyone else?”

“No. I’m not tall and good looking like you, women don’t see me that way. Not women like Jyoti or Claire anyway. And Jyoti is an American, she’s at home there, I’m not. I hate it, they see my color and they hear my accent, I’m not one of them. I’d rather move to the jungle and grow coffee than live in that big house in California where I’m a second class citizen.”

“We should change places, Raj.” I joked, “You move to Zambia with my mother, and I’ll move to California with your wife.”

He stopped walking and stood as still as a statue. “That’s what I was thinking.” He said, “I’m still in love with Claire, Travis. I know that’s crazy, but man, when I look into her eyes you know, my heart just misses a beat and I feel something I never feel with my wife. Jyoti is smart, nice, beautiful. She deserves a man who will love her.”

“Jesus, you’re serious.” I noted, “Well, Mom would go for it. She’s got a thing for you too, and she’d love to go back to Africa.”

“All you have to do is seduce Jyoti again.” He insisted. “Do that thing you do.”

“What are you talking about?”

“My mother told me, you have devil eyes.” He said, “She wanted us to go back to India years before we did. And Jyoti told me the same thing, almost the same words. It doesn’t matter if it’s real, she believes it. And it was her idea to stop over and visit you.”

I kept silent; did my friend really want me to fuck his beautiful wife? Did she know I’d slept with her mother in law Radha for years? How could I live with the lies I’d have to tell, because no one would accept me if they knew about my relationship with my own mother.

On the other hand; Jyoti was everything I’d ever wanted, on long gorgeous legs. Her hair, her face, her big dark eyes...

We met Jyoti and mother for dinner in the hotel restaurant; the boy was asleep in a crib next to the table, oblivious to the hubbub.

We all talked about everything except what needed to be talked about. Our jobs, our properties, our friends.

Jyoti seemed to be flirting a little, Mother seemed a little jealous. After dinner we all went for a walk, Raj had Hari in a stroller as he walked with Mom, Jyoti and I walked ahead; we able to talk were alone together for the first time since our wild fuck 5 years earlier.

“Raj doesn’t love me.” She told me without bitterness. “I don’t blame him, I haven’t been a good wife. It was crazy from the start to imagine we could force our emotions into the box we wanted them to be inside of.”

“I feel bad about it.” I told her, “I had a hand in it all too.”

“That was a bit more than a hand.” She joked, and we shared a laugh. “Don’t get any ideas, I’m a mother now and I plan to keep my husband.”

“But you said he doesn’t love you.”

“Love shmuv, we have a kid, jobs, a house. He’s a good man, Travis. We don’t satisfy each other in bed, but the rest of the time we’re great together.”

“I don’t understand; I know your parts all work just fine, and so do his. You made a baby, didn’t you?”

“We did.” She conceded. “And with Claire’s help, we might make another.”

“What do you mean?”

“He only gets hard for your mother.” She told me. “He ... look, I’ll leave the details to your imagination, ok? Rajesh is still fixated on your mother. Our therapist says it’s a sexual disorder.”

“What do you say?”

“What can I say? My husband is in love with a woman 20 years older than me. And I can’t...”

“What?”

“I don’t get satisfaction either. Sexually I mean. It’s ok, a lot of women don’t. There’s more to life than sex.”

“You sure seemed to enjoy that night with me.” I suggested.

“That was rare.” She said, “I’m broken, Travis. That part of me just doesn’t work.”

I thought about what she’d told me, and what Raj had told me. Now I understood why he wanted to foist his wife on me; she was willing to live that way, he was not.

“So you want to have a threesome.” I summarized, “Where my mother would induce Raj to ejaculate into you, have I got that right?”

“Well, it’s more of a whim than a plan.” She said, “In reality if I want another baby with Rajesh, the best hope of success is with medical assistance. I just thought this way would be a lot more fun. I want to satisfy my man, you know?”

“I see.” I mumbled in disappointment.

As I said, Mother had relationships with other men from time to time; we both knew we should find real partners and get out of our rut. I wasn’t too distressed about the idea that she and Raj would do it together again, and I had no big emotions for Jyoti either. Of course I wanted to fuck her if I could, and if I couldn’t then it wasn’t going to hurt me.

“I guess you hoped for a repeat of my wedding night.” She said.

“I can’t deny that I was getting my hopes up.” I admitted.

“Travis, get the car and we’ll all go back to our place.” Mother called out.

The drive was around a half hour; Raj mostly talked about coffee. When we got home, Mom and Raj went straight upstairs to her room. I sat in the kitchen with Jyoti and the baby.

“I thought you were going to join them.” I said.

“Oh, we already gave up on that. My rhythm didn’t cooperate with the plan, I’m not ovulating. We could go for a walk or something.”

“Actually, we can’t.” I told her, “An unmarried unrelated male and female walking alone at night is illegal here.”

“You’re shitting me, really?”

“Technically, it’s not even allowed during the day.” I told her.

“How do you ever get laid?” she asked, and we started to talk.

And talk

And talk.

The thumping from upstairs finally stopped as Mom and Raj went to sleep, and still Jyoti and I sat close, her big brown eyes more sexy than her succulent body as she told me her story, and I told her mine too.

She’d been groomed by her classmates, and her virginity sold to an elderly school janitor in return for an advance copy of the senior final exam (Jyoti was a junior, just 15 at the time).

She didn’t know if that was the cause of her sexual disfunction; she’d tried many lovers, but rarely had orgasms.

“I only come with unsuitable men.” She told me sadly, “Like with you that night, what could be lower? The best man the night before my wedding. Even then, it only happens once. I had it off with my dad’s boss, I came so hard! And then never again, not with him. I seduced a priest, same result. I was in love once, really crazy for this guy, and we tried all sorts of things, I never came after the first time. I would have stayed with him, he drifted away. This sex thing, it’s fucked up; in our culture, love is attached to sex. You can’t have one without the other, not at the start anyway.

“So when my parents suggested Rajesh, I agreed to meet him, and we liked each other. I told him I’m not ok, that I pretty much never come. He told me he was still in love with a woman he couldn’t have, and we decided to try the Asian way. Marry first and find love later.”

“And it’s not working?” I asked.

“Not too well.” She said sorrowfully, gesturing at the room above. “We do love each other, and that’s the worst part. You see, we live in America; divorce is easy cheap, fast. We almost did it a few times. I don’t want anyone else, Travis. The brief moment of pleasure isn’t even close to covering the cost. The thing is, it seems I can’t be satisfied in that way, Rajesh can. Only by your mother though, you see he has a sexual disfunction too.

“We both wanted a kid, and it just made sense to have one together and be a family. We decided to have the baby, and just be together.”

The sun was rising; it was Friday and we didn’t have to go to work. Raj and Joyti had another day before their onward flight to India. We all had breakfast, then went to the foreigner beach where bikinis were permitted. I sat with Raj on the sand as we watched his wife and my mother splashing in the surf.

“I should divorce her and marry Claire.” Raj said.

“Come on Raj; it’s just your balls talking. When the sexual thrill wears off, you’d miss your wife.”

“You’re forgetting that I already spent years sharing a bed with her. Jyoti I mean, and years with Claire too. Fuck man, I’m in love with your mother; I thought it would go away over time, it never did. I can’t satisfy my wife. I think of Claire all the time. Even now, look at the two of them; my wife is tall, slim, gorgeous. Your mother is starting to sag, her hair turned grey long ago. Yet I want her, only her. I thought I’d be over her, you know, the morning after. I’d wake up in bed with an old woman, be horrified, go back to my waiting wife. It’s the opposite, Travis! Man, I’m so fucked. If it wasn’t for Hari, I’d go seek my happiness.”

“Damn, Raj. I don’t know what to say; just for the record though, nothing happened between Jyoti and I last night. She told me she’d had enough of that.”

“Really? That’s a surprise.” He said, “I don’t know that she ever cheated on me, just that she had a lot of boyfriends before we were married and a few while we were separated. She’s a fine woman Travis, she deserves a man who can love her physically. So what did you do all night?”

“We talked.” I told him. “You know what it’s like here, I don’t get to talk to many women. I really like her, I hope you work it out.”

“You should fuck her.” He insisted, “Tonight, if I’m lucky enough to go to bed with Claire again, please, please fuck my wife again Travis.”

“Why? I understand you want to sleep with my mom again, hell if your mother was here ... never mind that, Jyoti accepts you doing it with another woman, what more could you want?”

“I told you. I want to break this marriage up. She won’t let go, yet she can’t love me. Do that thing to her, Travis. You know, the eye thing.”

“No!” I objected. “It’s not real, I don’t have any magic Raj.”

“Then there’s no harm in looking Jyoti in the eyes until she falls on her back for you.” He argued, “You have your mother’s eyes, Travis. I know what you did to my mother, and to Jyoti too. It’s the same power Claire has over me, there’s no use denying it.”

His words shocked me; I remembered mother telling the story of my biological father to Radha all those years before, how he’d been the one with devil’s eyes and I’d gotten them from him. Maybe that was never true, Mom didn’t want to tell her friend that it was her own blue hypnotic irises that I’d inherited. Maybe Mom didn’t want her friend to notice that her son was enthralled by the same power she was, that mother and son are both monsters.

Nah, that was all esoteric erotic bullshit. I don’t believe in magic, spirits, god, greater powers. People had sex with people all the time, just like every animal on the planet. There was no need to make up stupid complicated explanations for simple lust.

“Ok.” I agreed, “If you’re in bed with my mother again tonight, and if your wife and I are alone together again, I’ll give her the stare.”

“Thanks, Travis.” He said gratefully.

Jyoti was fussing over the baby after dinner as Raj and Mother had a bath together upstairs, and after a while I heard the tub drain and the bedroom door close. I watched her, the look in her eyes as she gently fed and changed her child, the intensity of her love.