Chapter 8

I’m forced to watch myself get onto my knees and see his erection in my hands. My eyes are looking up at him as my mouth opens to do that disgusting. There’s a closeup of my face and wish it didn’t look like I was enjoying myself.

My head starts to move with his hips and wish I could look away or close my eyes. I hear him enjoying himself as my lips stretch and just what the nightmare to end. He pulls back and know what’s coming next. This explains the sore jaw and I know the hairs were his pubic hairs.

I see the twitching in my hands and hear the cough as his semen falls to my finger. More twitching and coughing causes more to fall out of my mouth. I’m disgusted by him and just want this to be over, but this is a hell that will not end.

At last it’s over and he pauses it with his semen on my lips. His hand still hasn’t released my head and I’m forced to stare at myself. I’m too angry and hurt to say anything. My son did this to me with the help of Walt and I never wanted God to strike anyone dead as much as these two.

His hand keeps my head in place and his voice is too calm. “That’s what happened last night. Both of our faces are on the video and you can’t deny you sucked my dick and had my cum in your mouth. Don’t think this is the only copy, either. Walt has the drive and he won’t ever bring it over.”

I scream out. “You drugged me and made me to that to you. I’m your mother. How dare you?”

The image is slowly being burned into my mind as his voice remains calm. “I’m not going to lie. We did drug you, but good luck proving it. Your voice is clear in the video and the glassy eyes could be from wine. As for forcing you, you chose to get on your knees.”

I try to look at him, but can only stare at the paused image and my voice snaps at him. “Why would you do this to your own mother?”

He lets out a soft laugh, which angers me more. “I did it because you’re my mother. I’m sick of your holier than thou bullshit. I’m sick of you telling me I’m going to hell. I’m sick of your hypocritical ass complaining about vanity, while you die your hair.

“Here’s what’s going to happen. Walt’s already made copies and I gave him the email address for everyone at your church. All he has to do is click send. He’s also got DVDs ready to be mailed out. Everyone you go to church with will see you committing an incestuous act with me.”

Tears start to roll down my face and still his hand keeps my head in place. “You can’t.”

His voice remains calm and he’s thought this whole thing through. “Walt’s the one sending them and he won’t think anything of it. One phone call is all it takes to make it happen. Do you want me to make that call, mom?”

I try to shake my head, but all I can do is allow more tears to fall down my cheeks. “No.”

He doesn’t answer right away and I’m afraid he’s going to call no matter what. “Then you have to do things for me. I want to be real clear with you, mom, so you know exactly what the price is to keep that video from being released to everyone at your church. You’re going to be my incestuous whore of a mother. Do you understand?”

I can’t do what he wants, but don’t see any way out of it, “Tell me something before I answer. Why would you do this to me?”

He releases my hair as he says, “Look at me, mom.” My head moves towards his and look into his eyes for something I don’t see. “I’m sick of you calling every fucking woman you meet a whore. Not every woman is a fucking whore, but your going to be. Do you want me to make that call?”

There’s no way out. Hanson’s thought of everything and already knows what I’m going to say. Tears continue to fall and he doesn’t care what he’s doing to me.

I shake my head and my voice trembles. “No.”

His eyes show no compassion and his voice fills with certainty. “Tell me what your going to be for me. I want you to say exactly what I told you I want you to be. Don’t leave out a fucking word, mom.”

My entire body shakes and have to use those words. “I’m going to be your incestuous whore of a mother.”

I want to vomit after hearing myself say those things, but all I can do is cry harder. He stands and towers over me with something dangerous in his eyes and I’m afraid he’s about to make me do what I’ve no memory of doing. His eyes crawl down my body and I want to claw them out.

He grins as his eyes move to my hair and I hate that grin. “Take the tie out of your hair. When your in the house, I don’t want your hair pulled back like that ever again. Outside the house, I don’t give a fuck what you do with your hair, but inside, you’re going to let it loose, mom.”