Chapter 29

Deana saw Gloria passing her room and said, “You need a bigger towel. I can see your butt.”

Gloria poked her head in, scanned the room, and said, “I bet that shirt doesn’t cover all of yours either. Turn around.”

As if she wasn’t sure, Deana smirked and reached behind her. “Oops, but you got a whole lot more sexy showing, and I’m in my room, getting ready for bed. You, you’re out there. So you should get in here because you have something to tell me.”

Gloria closed the door and said, “I do?”

“Yes, you do, so sit.” Deana grabbed the desk chair and whirled it around at her sister. “I’ll brush your hair while you explain.”

“Explain?” Gloria wrapped the towel higher on her chest and sat. “Explain what?”

Deana stood behind Gloria and turned the chair so it faced the mirror. “Why Mom thinks you were at Jayda’s and you weren’t?” She’s so fuckin’ cute, Deana thought while looking at Gloria’s face in the mirror.

“How do you know where I wasn’t?”

“I don’t know where, but I know who.”

Gloria’s eyes widened. “Does Mom know?”

“Don’t think so, but I can’t believe you’d keep this from me.” She worked the brush through Gloria’s hair. “You got a message from Darlene.”

“I did?” Gloria’s cheeks flushed. “Did you read it?”

“Dah, how else would I know it was for you?”

“Oh, yeah, well, what did she say?”

“I’m more interested in what your face is telling me.” She pinched her sister’s cheek and said, “You’re smitten.”

“Am not!”

“Then you better give your face the message. Oh, Darlene said to tell you she had a wonderful time.”

“Mm, it was, but I still can’t believe it.”

“Neither can I. How did you hook up with Darlene?”

“Who said anything about hooking up?”

She wrapped her hands around Gloria’s neck, making her squirm and giggle. “Tell me!”

“Okay, okay, stop, I’ll tell you, but it wasn’t like what you’re thinking. What happened isn’t the kind of thing you plan. It just happens, sometimes.”

Deana squinted an eye. “Really?”

“Keep brushing. It feels good.” Gloria leaned her head forward. “Don’t be mad, but I asked Darlene to tell me about the first time. I wanted to be prepared, you know, if Evan ever...”

“That’s fine, but how did you get from talking about sex with a boy to that glowing after-sex face?”

“I didn’t know it would happen, except maybe I was hoping it would?”

Deana pulled down on Gloria’s hair, forcing her to look in the mirror. “Okay, and it did,” Deana said. “And I guess it was really good?”

“It was unbelievable ... incredible.” Gloria closed her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” She rubbed her sister’s shoulders while she waited.

“I’m scared,” Gloria said.

Deana tossed the brush on the bed, straddled Gloria’s lap, and sat facing her. “Of what?” She wiped a tear from Gloria’s cheek.

“It’s nothing.”

“Baby girl, no more secrets, we agreed.”

“It’s stupid, but I think I love her.”

That was obvious from the starry-eyed daze, but Deana suspected there was more. “Not knowing if someone feels the same way you do is scary, but is there something else? You afraid of being like me?”

“No, Dee, it’s not like that. I mean, it is scary thinking about that, but that’s not it.” She threw her arms around Deana’s neck and held on tight.

“Ah, baby, you’re shivering. Come on.” She pulled Gloria up and walked her backward to the bed. They got in, covered up, and turned on their sides, facing each other. They shared a pillow. “Shh, I hear someone. Pretend you’re sleeping.”

After their mother popped her head in, whispered something, and turned off the light, Deana threaded her leg between Gloria’s. “What could be more terrifying than wondering if you’re gay?”

Gloria tightened her thighs on Deana’s leg and exhaled. The air caught in her throat. It was almost a sob. “Dee, it was so much more than anything that has ever happened to me. It was like ... um, I don’t know.”

“Like it was your first time?”

Gloria nodded and wiped her eyes. “I guess. It was beautiful. She made me cry when I came. That has never happened before. I think she did, too. Does that mean I’m in love?”

“Could be, and there isn’t anything wrong with that.”

“But there is,” Gloria said. “There’s a lot wrong with it. I barely know her, and what about Evan?”

Deana’s mind went to the worst possible thing, the fear that had pushed her into losing her cherry, but she said, “You would feel like you’re cheating on one of them, right?”

“I guess, but there’s more to it than that, and it’s probably all crazy stuff in my head.”

For the second time, Deana said, “No more secrets,” and a guilty feeling prickled in her stomach.

“Dee, remember how I freaked out after meeting Aunt Sally because of her eyes? They were like mine, exactly like mine, and they gave me a funny feeling when I stared into them?”

“Yeah, I remember.”

“It was the same with Darlene. I didn’t know what it was, but ever since the mall, when I looked into her eyes, I felt something. Today, when she kissed me goodbye and got out of the car in front of that trailer, I was sure. She lives where Mom grew up. Did you know that? In the same trailer park Mom took me to the day we were at Aunt Sally’s. Darlene lives there.”

Deana struggled to find the appropriate words, and Gloria mistook her stunned silence. “I knew you were gonna think it was stupid. Maybe it is?”

“No, baby, no, it’s not.” Deana rolled on her back and sucked in a huge breath. “Not at all.” Her heart was racing.

Gloria propped her head up, looked down at Deana, and asked, “What is it? What happened? I see it on your face. You know something.”

“Shit, I thought I was nuts,” Deana said, wondering how much she could tell Gloria? “Darlene kissed me, and I saw it. I didn’t know what it was, but I see it now. You and Darlene have the same beautiful eyes. You could be sisters. Is that what’s worse, you could be in love with your sister?”