Chapter 10: Sweet Almond Massage

When Evan got out of bed, it was too early, considering how tired he felt. The hours spent in bed hadn’t been restful. If he wasn’t dreaming about what happened, Evan was half awake, thinking about it. There was no reason to believe Deana hadn’t done the same thing.

It had been spontaneous; two horny teenagers who got carried away. Sure there was something special between them, which complicated things, but Evan knew it was wrong and could never happen again. He wasn’t sure Deana saw it that way, but she was smart enough to know things would get really weird between them if they had sex. They could never live under the same roof afterward. They’d either want to do it all the time—Evan would—or one would end up dating someone, and the other would be hurt. It wasn’t like they could date each other. Plus, it would be almost impossible to hide it for long. If their father found out, he’d kill Evan, and even if they didn’t get caught, their mother would sense things were strange between them. Things were already strange.

Deana might have acted impulsively in the basement for reasons Evan didn’t comprehend, but he went to her while she was in the shower. What did he think was going to happen?

Downstairs in the bathroom, Evan saw that Deana hadn’t bothered to put her clothes in the hamper after her shower. He stared at the gray sweatpants and shirt—no underwear. Every sane part of Evan told him not to. It’s what started all your problems in the first place, he thought while picking up the pants. But it’s not Deana’s panties.

Certain smells—the first mowed lawn of the season, the air after a thunderstorm, hot asphalt on a summer day—connect the mind to special memories. Evan pressed the crotch of his sister’s sweatpants to his nose, inhaled deeply, and created a forever link. Deana’s eyes had glistened, her face glowed, and Evan knew he had caused it. He made Deana climax, and now he knew exactly what it smelled like. Would every sniff of any girl’s panties make Evan remember the orgasm he gave his twin sister?

An abduction by sex-starved aliens was starting to be more believable than everything that was happening. Evan needed to put time between him and what happened in the shower before he faced Deana again. At least my boner for Mom is on the back burner, Evan thought.

Jason awoke from a dream. It was the same dream he’d had for years, in one form or another. He reached for his dick, wanting to hold it while he tried to go back into fantasy land. That was the only place Jason had been able to lose his virginity.

His eyes snapped open, and he flung the sheet back. There was a crusty layer covering his cock. Suddenly, Jason was wide awake. The reoccurring dream had actually been reality. I’m not a virgin anymore, Jason thought, I lost my cherry to my sister.

The scene replayed in Jason’s mind. It should have disturbed him, but reliving all the sensations that went along with sex felt too good for that. The blow jobs had been incredible, a hundred times better than jerking off, even if a dog was licking his asshole, but the inside of a girl’s pussy—Fucking had been better than Jason had imagined, and he had a great imagination.

The physical sense of pleasure had been Earth-shattering, but going from sound asleep to Becky’s skinny body perched on the head of his cock, then dropping down and taking him inside her, that was mind-altering. Sex, the first time, changes you, but getting fucked by your sister changes everything. Jason’s world was different now, and it could never go back to the way it had been.

The things he heard about Becky at school had never made Jason jealous, but now he wished he could have been her first. They could have shared the amazement and awe of losing your virginity together. Of course, Jason wouldn’t tell Becky she had been his first.

How would he live with Becky now and not hurt their mother again? His sister wouldn’t make it easy. He had to talk to Becky, so after putting on boxers and a T-shirt, Jason went to find her.

At Miss Tonya’s house, Evan was disappointed that her car wasn’t in the driveway. That meant she probably took Jayda to the same special practice his mother had taken Gloria to. He wouldn’t get to catch anybody tanning in the nude. Jayda was all show and tell and tease. Too bad, Evan thought, she would have been a great distraction. That was precisely what he needed, a huge distraction. Something bigger than sex with Becky. Of course, nothing short of finding Miss Tonya tanning naked on the other side of the gate, ready to fuck his brains out, was going to distract Evan from what happened with Deana.

The gate’s latch clicked, but it didn’t unhook and let the gate swing open. Evan stared at it for a few seconds, then walked toward the woods at the back of the property. Even though Miss Tonya wasn’t home, and she wouldn’t be naked in the backyard, he regressed to years earlier. Jason and Evan used to walk their neighborhood after dark, hoping to peek in someone’s window. On Earth, they never got to see a naked woman, but on Planet Fucked Up Shit, there was potential.

Evan eased through the underbrush until he could see the back of the shed. The act of being sneaky was exhilarating. He sidestepped, trying not to make a sound, as if Jayda and her mother were sunbathing nude. That was stupid but still exciting in a childish way. He moved a branch like a spy, peeking through the bush.

At Gloria’s practice, Candy sat on the top row of the bleachers, waiting for Tonya. Airing dirty laundry was not something Candy could do, but if she was going to talk to anyone, it would be Tonya. She was the only person who saw through the facade. Still, Tonya didn’t know the depth of Candy’s deception and she didn’t intend to tell her friend about the fight with John. Knowing I can is enough, Candy told herself.

A boy poked his friend and pointed, then the group whispered and giggled. Candy saw Tonya’s backside was the object of the boy’s fascination. She grinned and watched the woman climb the bleachers. Tonya’s yoga pants were stretched tight over the bulge at her crotch, and it reminded Candy of the stupid rhymes the boys would say on the playground. Their cruelty was often directed at her. Hopefully, she had done a better job helping Gloria cope with elementary school than her mother had done for her. Names hurt as much as sticks and stones as far as Candy was concerned.

Tonya huffed and took a seat next to Candy. “Did you have to sit all the way up here?”

“Sorry,” she said with a smirk and pointed. “Those boys loved watching you climb up here. Wow, I wouldn’t dare wear those outside.”

“Candy, if I had a body like yours, I’d show it off every chance I got. Those boys would be having wet dreams if they saw you in yoga pants.”

Candy dropped her face and bit her lip. She wasn’t allowed to draw attention to herself in public. “Thanks, but—”

“I know, John would kill you if you went out in something that made you look good. I’d still do it,” Tonya said. “We only have so many years before these things start losing their appeal. I’m going to make the most of that time, and you should too.”

The sob caught Candy by surprise, then the tears started flowing, but it wasn’t the truth of Tonya’s words that set them off. Neither had the memory of the burning pain, the humiliation of having her hair pulled, or the degrading act she was forced to perform. Those things were par for the course, and Candy had given up crying about them. Why was she crying now?

For years, she’d accepted her powerless and helpless state. John didn’t love her; he owned her, and there wasn’t anything Candy could do about it. That was reality, and she was doing what needed to be done for her daughter and John’s kids. They all needed her, and that had always been enough to keep Candy going. There was no point in hoping for more because hope was the enemy of acceptance; it agitated a peaceful balance like too many clothes on one side of the washing machine.

Damn it, the fantasy world had tainted reality with hope that revived the sedated giant whose appetite for passion and pleasure was insatiable. It couldn’t be caged, and it would try to fight or take flight, but that would be a battle Candy would never win, and where could she run. She’d be used up and undesirable before she got free, and that revelation brought her to tears.

Tonya rubbed Candy’s back and said, “I knew something was wrong. That’s why I came. I heard it in your voice when you called. Tell me.”

Candy leaned harder into the hug she desperately needed, minimized the fight to an argument, and downplayed her unhappiness.

Tonya didn’t believe her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize things were so bad.”

“I’m just emotional ... it’s not anything to be crying about,” Candy said.

Candy looked at their thighs touching together and placed her hand on Tonya’s leg. It was almost like talking to her sister, Sally, except Tonya couldn’t know all the sick secrets. Sally would know everything, and Sally would do things to make Candy feel better. She could never go there with Tonya. Two teenagers holding hands on the bottom row of the bleachers made Candy envy the powerful, youthful love and the passion it would produce. “I don’t like to talk about it, but thanks for listening.”

“What are you going to do?” Tonya asked.

“What can I do, divorce him?” she said. “Evan and Deana are like my own. I could never leave them, and where would I go anyway. I can’t ... I can’t do anything.” She could, but it would cost Candy everything. “It’ll get better. It’s just a phase.”

“You ever think of getting ... ah, having something on the side?”

Candy leaned her head on Tonya’s shoulder and shivered. John wouldn’t have all the leverage if she hadn’t tried that and been caught. So many things would be different. Cheating with anybody would have been a disgrace and grounds for John to send her and Gloria packing without a dime, but she did it with someone he could use to send Candy away without Gloria. She would never leave Gloria behind as John’s prisoner. How could she have let herself get so needy? “You got something in mind?”

“Not really,” Tonya said. “I’m just talking. It’s not fair. You deserve better.”

“Thanks,” she said, wishing Tonya could offer more. “John knows everyone, everything. He’d find out, and then what?” Then her Hell would get worse, or he’d kill her. “It’s not that bad. It’s just not what I dreamed of ... hoped for.”

“Candy, you’re so young and beautiful, and you’re wonderful, a wonderful person. You deserve to be happy and, um, satisfied.”

She squeezed Tonya’s leg. “Thank you. I’ve missed out, but it’s what I chose for Gloria. Things will get better, they have to.” Only if Candy could figure out how to make John’s secrets bigger than hers.

After giving Tonya a few seconds to challenge what they both knew to be a lie, Candy asked, “Where’s Jayda?”

“Said she didn’t feel good, but I’m sure she’ll recover quickly when Evan arrives. She actually had him spreading lotion on her yesterday.”

“She’ll be disappointed, Evan likes older women.” Realizing how that sounded, Candy quickly added, “He acts like it’s a crime to even look at a girl younger than him.”

Tonya didn’t miss a thing. “Really, women?” she said. “Maybe I should have him rub lotion on me.”

“Sounds like fun,” Candy said, hoping her tone didn’t convey her true desire. “He gives great massages.”

“Hmm, interesting,” Tonya said with a smirk.

What about softball, Evan thought, then thinking became difficult. One of the softball sisters was playing hooky. Jayda was right where he’d left her, flat on her stomach with her feet toward him. There was one difference, though, no blue straps looping her hips. Even if she was wearing a thong, there would be something wrapped around her waist.

The sun glistened on the orbs of Jayda’s ass. She really did get naked in her backyard, Evan thought. Too bad she hadn’t waited for him to rub the oil on her. Would Jayda have trusted him to rub oil on her naked body?

Evan reminded himself that she was Gloria’s friend. In his present state of mind, going anywhere near Jayda would be dangerous and stupid, so he considered his options.

It would be embarrassing now to walk out of the woods and have Jayda think he was hiding in the bushes, spying on her. Offering to massage her oiled flesh with a boner would be wrong. Go back and bang on the gate, Evan thought. That was the most appropriate thing to do. Although, jerking off first would be the next best thing to do. Do the right thing, his father would say. He hadn’t had sex with his sister, so wasn’t this the next right thing?

Jayda started moving, rolled on her side, and put her feet on the grass as she sat up. When she stood, a whole new possibility arose in Evan’s mind. She turned completely toward him. Big pinkish-brown nipples covered the tops of her mini ski jump tits. They were her mother’s tits, waiting to grow up.

Evan was sure Jayda couldn’t see him but still held his breath when she started toward the woods. Getting caught spying on Gloria’s friend would definitely be humiliating. His heart raced, and blood thumped in Evan’s ears. Getting caught beating off would be worse, but that might be the most right thing Evan was capable of. He had wanted Deana more than he was willing to admit and probably more than he knew. Physical relief and a distraction from how he felt about Deana were what Evan needed now.

Jayda went around the corner of the shed, turned, faced it, and glanced over her shoulder. Her hands were on her hips. They moved around to her back, which arched. A pit opened in Evan’s stomach and swallowed his brain. The sound reached his ears a second after Evan saw it, yet even with two of his senses receiving it, he struggled to believe what was happening. Jayda was pissing on her shed. A stream of fluid was shooting from between her legs and splattering on the shingles. He’d seen women piss standing up on the internet, but this wasn’t like that. It was the most incredible thing that could have possibly happened.

A conglomerate of psychological factors caused his response, but without a degree in Psychology, Evan wouldn’t understand why he needed to reach her before she heard him. The grass under his feet reminded Evan of how it felt to creep into his mother’s room and peek at her pussy. The same fear knotted his stomach. His eyes were glued on Jayda’s ass and the splashing piss. Was this something she usually did? He had seriously underestimated the potential girls had for doing the nasty things that aroused him.

Jayda sensed Evan or heard him. Her head whirled around, but the stream took a few seconds to stop. “Oops,” she said, and more fluid spurted and trickled to a stop. “I drank too much. I had to go.”

Evan was too stupid with lust to realize Jayda hadn’t been frightened by him suddenly appearing behind her. He said the first thing that popped into his brain, “You’re naked.” He immediately wished something intelligent had come out of his mouth.

“Really, you noticed,” Jayda said. Her cheeks flushed, but she didn’t cross her arms over her erect nipples. Instead, she put her hands on her hips. “I told you.”

The increasing size of Jayda’s nipples changed the shape of her tits. Evan watched it happen without speaking. Then, his eyes went to the fat wedge covered with curly brown hair. Pee splatter was dribbling down Jayda’s inner thighs. Never before had Evan imagined his little sister naked, not even when he came in Gloria’s underwear. Thank you, Jayda, he thought. Now I’m wondering if Gloria has a big bush and nipples that cover the top half of her tits.

Jayda took a wider stance. “Well?”

“Well, what?” he asked.

“You gonna do a better job now?”

Yesterday, Evan wanted to finger Jayda right under her mother’s nose. Since then, he had given his sister an orgasm and almost stuffed his cock in her. Straddling Jayda’s naked, oiled body while Miss Tonya was gone would lead to something Gloria could never hear about. He could blackmail Jayda with the dirt pile. Unless Gloria already knew about the nasty things Jayda did back there. Evan told himself to say no. “What about your mother?”

“She ain’t home,” Jayda said with a smug expression that made Evan want to choke her for making him feel what he felt. Jayda wasn’t Gloria, and Gloria wasn’t anything like Jayda, but it still didn’t feel okay to consider fucking her.

“What if she comes home?”

“We’ll hear her car in plenty of time, but she’ll be gone a while.”

Evan was about to do something he was sure to regret. “All right—” The sound of a car cut him off. “Shit, that’s her!”

“She won’t look back here,” Jayda said.

This girl has less sense than me, Evan thought. Did Jayda believe they would do something behind the shed while her mother was home? A car door slammed. Don’t panic, he thought. The gate squeaked. “The gate, it was locked.”

“She’ll go in the house,” Jayda said.

“Evan ... Jayda,” Miss Tonya’s voice called out. He panicked. Jayda didn’t have any clothes on or with her. Think, think of a plan, he told himself. They were screwed.

He whispered, “Stay calm,” and pointed. “Go around that way. I’ll go this way.” He shoved Jayda toward the other corner of the shed. It seemed like he could hear grass crunching under her feet, but it might have been the sound of fear.

“I’m back here,” he said, moving in the opposite direction of the naked girl. He’d have to keep Miss Tonya facing him while Jayda crossed the yard.

“Evan,” Miss Tonya said.

“Yes, ma’am, right here.” He stepped out from behind the building.

She approached and said, “Hi. Is Jayda around?”

Think like Deana. She could come up with an answer or excuse for anything. His brain scrambled for words, then a light bulb went on. “No, the gate was locked, and your car wasn’t here ... I, um, figured you were where my mom is, at practice ... with Jayda. I came around the back, ah, through the woods.” He tried maintaining eye contact, but Jayda was streaking across the yard behind her mother’s back.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” she said. “I could have sworn I left it unlocked for you.”

The alien that had taken over Jayda’s body stopped at the lawn chair and turned toward Evan, displaying full-frontal nudity, daring her mother to catch her. He might have sighed with relief when Jayda finally picked something up and pulled it over her head. “Ah, I hope you, um, you don’t mind that I, you know, came back, came around the fence when you weren’t here.” He knew he probably wasn’t making sense.

“Oh no, that’s fine. It’s my fault ... I think,” she said.

“Okay, well, I better get busy.” Jayda swung the screen door open and pretended she was coming out of the house. He said, “There she is.”

“Hi, Mom,” Jayda said.

Miss Tonya turned her head, then shook it. “She looks fine to me.”

Jayda didn’t look fine to Evan. The dress thing she put on was designed to be worn over a bikini, not a naked girl. “Huh?” he croaked.

“She told me she didn’t feel good this morning. Looks like she just didn’t want to go to practice,” Miss Tonya said. “Can’t imagine why.” She grinned at him.

“Got me,” he said, itching to get away from Jayda’s mother. “I’ll get started.”

“Okay,” she said. “Evan, you don’t have to rub lotion on her.”

She was watching! The blood drained from his face. Miss Tonya was going to give him hell for straddling and groping her almost-naked daughter.

Miss Tonya gave Evan the same, I got ya, smile she’d given him on the front porch and said, “Unless you want to.”

How do I respond to that? His brain put some words together, but Evan was afraid to speak. “Ah, um, okay,” he said. “I better get started.”

“You could always start with that massage you promised me. I worked out really hard at the gym.”

Miss Tonya’s emphasis on the word hard sent a chill down Evan’s back. Hadn’t he come here hoping something like this would happen? “Really?” Had he promised to massage her?

“Unless you weren’t serious.”

“I was ... Sure, I can do that, if you want.”

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want.”

Miss Tonya had done it again, emphasizing the word want. I’m not on another planet, Evan thought, I’m in a porn movie. “All right,” he said, trying to sound confident. “You get a chair and—”

“Chair?” she said, shaking her head. “I had a full-body workout, I need the same kind of massage. You might have to touch places you wouldn’t touch on your mother.”

She’s just playing with you, play along. “I doubt that could happen.”

“Interesting,” she said. “Give me a few minutes to get ready.”

I fucked Becky right under her mother’s nose, Evan told himself, trying to get back into that Groundhog Day state of mind. “Okay,” he said, wondering if get ready meant get naked.

She turned around and started walking. Miss Tonya in yoga pants wasn’t like Rebecca in her gymnastics pants. A country song started playing in his head, Honky Tonk Badonkadonk. It was a big ass by high school girl standards, but it was amazing to watch. Each side rose and fell like a hypnotist’s swinging watch, then jiggled. He couldn’t keep his eyes off it.

Evan’s heart rate slowed once Miss Tonya and Jayda were in the house. What was worse, almost getting caught with a naked Jayda or what he might have done to her if they hadn’t practically gotten caught? He didn’t know, and it didn’t matter now because he was waiting to find out whether Miss Tonya planned to seduce him. Waiting sucked.

In the house, Miss Tonya said, “Jayda, what did I tell you about that?”

Jayda looked around like she might find the answer floating in the air. “About what, Mom?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, so don’t play dumb with me,” she said. “I told you to wear your bathing suit when somebody is here, especially a boy.”

“Mom, I wasn’t naked, I had my sundress on. I was setting up my chair when Evan got here. I went inside to put my bathing suit on, but you came home.”

“You watch yourself,” Miss Tonya said. “You keep teasing like you did yesterday, and you might get more than you bargained for. Why don’t you go over to Brittany’s house so Evan can do what he needs to do without being distracted by your ass.”

“Mom!”

“Don’t Mom me, just get something on under that see-through dress and get ... for a couple of hours. You had your fun yesterday. I’m sure Evan needs a day to calm down,” Miss Tonya said.

“But—”

“Go.” Miss Tonya pointed.

When Jason reached the kitchen, his mother was sitting at the table. He forgot it was Tuesday, the day the library closed late. She didn’t start work until noon. He sat at the opposite end of the long table. That was his normal spot. He called it the head of the table, but Becky said it was the ass end. Their mother gave her the evil eye whenever Becky said it, but that didn’t stop her.

His mother smiled and said, “Good morning.” She sipped her coffee, then went back to clipping coupons.

“Hi,” he said and observed her. Everything was normal in her world. She sipped her coffee again, eyes on him. Jason tested his mother’s ability to read his mind or facial expressions by thinking about the look on Becky’s face when her body was suddenly filled with cock. His groin tightened. I fucked Becky, he said in his head. Nothing, his mother kept on enjoying her coffee, oblivious. He should have felt guilty, but Jason didn’t. It felt good sitting there in front of his mother, thinking about fucking her daughter. The new world Jason had woken up in was exciting, and he felt like the evil dictator.

For the first time in a long time, Jason stared at his mother’s chest. She dressed very conservatively, but it was hard to hide so much breast and those big hard nipples. He pretended she was naked and felt like he was getting away with something. His dick was filling out the front of his boxers. He pictured Becky sitting in front of him with her legs spread. He always wanted to get off at the dinner table while staring at Becky’s erect nipples. Jason let his cock hang out of the leg opening of his boxers.

Had the three years of resistance made finally fucking Becky better than it would have been back then? Jason didn’t know, but getting away with it was liberating. He eased his hand down between his legs and squeezed his dick. What if Mom knows I’m touching himself? What if she wanted me to? Sex with his sister hadn’t made Jason a better person.

It was scary to think such thoughts, but they made Jason’s dick hard. He pressed it against his thigh and rubbed up and down. His mother looked right at him, ready to speak, and he was still touching his cock. As long as she doesn’t get up, she can’t see it, he thought, as if that made it okay.

His mother said, “I saw Evan’s mom at the library.”

Jason’s heart skipped a beat, but his dick didn’t retreat. If anything, it got more erect. “Really, Mom.” Why did he have to say Mom like that? “What was she doing there?”

“She said she needed to look something up on one of the computers.”

“Why?” he asked. “They have computers.”

“Got me,” she said, looking at him like she had more to say.

Jason put both hands on the table and tried to hide his concern, but his erection couldn’t be concealed. He wanted to ask her if Candy had mentioned anything about them going to the races, but Jason figured that would make his mother suspicious. Evan needed to be warned, but not until his boner subsided. That wouldn’t be soon if he kept having fantasies about his mother. Why had he ever stopped seeing her as sexy? She was a very good-looking woman.

“I have to go,” his mother said. “Try and do something productive today, other than video games. You don’t want your brain to stop working over the summer break.”

Jason said, “Okay,” but he had no idea what his mother just said. His mind was scrambling. It would be impossible to get his dick back in his shorts without drawing attention, so he calculated the chance of her looking under the table after she got up. What would she think if she saw my dick?

After fifteen minutes, Evan was still waiting for Miss Tonya. His hands clutched the arms of the folding chair and released, over and over. The idle time passed like a long road when you thought you might have already missed your turn. He was questioning everything, and the logical part of his brain was building a good case against the creative, fantasizing part. His confidence, if he’d actually had any, was gone.

The swooshing sound of the back door made Evan’s heart race. She’s ready for me, he thought and got up. The screen door swung open. It was Jayda. That’s when he finally realized all his fantasies of having sex with his mother’s friend were stupid. Miss Tonya wasn’t going to come back naked so he could rub oil all over her, not while Jayda was here.

“Hey,” he said and sat back down. He was starting to feel like a kid in timeout.

“Hey,” Jayda said and kept walking.

She was still wearing that cover-up, but now Jayda had a bikini under it. “Where you going?” he asked.

“I told you I hate tan lines,” she said. “I’m going over to Brittany’s house. Her parents aren’t home.”

Jayda’s disappointed tone made Evan wonder what she thought would have happened if her mother hadn’t come home. He said, “Have fun.” She left without responding. Could Brittany be the girl who was under Jayda’s pussy behind the dirt pile?

After a few more painful minutes in time out, the back door opened again. From behind the screen, Miss Tonya said, “I’m ready. Come on in.”

Evan stood up. Was “in” better or worse? Naked in the backyard would send a clear message that Miss Tonya wanted him to fuck her, but inside, things might not be so obvious.

In the kitchen, Evan looked around, wondering where Miss Tonya was. “In here,” a voice called out. She’s in her bedroom. His mother would never let a teenage boy in her room. He was barely allowed in there.

Miss Tonya was in the middle of her king-size bed with her head at the foot end, facing him. Her wet hair was bunched up at the back of her head, and her chin rested on her hands. Exactly like Jayda had been on the lawn chair. The difference was that yesterday, Jayda wore a bathing suit. Miss Tonya only had a towel across her ass. That’s obvious enough, right?

Should he close the door behind him? Evan left it open because he would never go into his mother’s room and close the door. No matter how obvious Miss Tonya made her intentions, she was still his mother’s friend, Jayda’s mother, and someone Evan had to address as ma’am or Miss Tonya. Being in her bedroom was terrifying. Even if she came right out and told him to mount her, Evan would probably stand there frozen with a dumb, open-mouth expression, just like he had when she gave herself a wet T-shirt.

“The oil is over there,” Miss Tonya said, nodding, “on the nightstand.”

“Good, okay, that’s good,” Evan said. He sighed internally, relieved to not be standing in front of her where his crotch was at her eye level. His mother in a bathrobe and panties gave him a boner; there was no way he wouldn’t be sporting wood looking at Miss Tonya’s badonkadonk covered with a skimpy towel. It really wasn’t a big enough towel.