Chapter 15: Assembly

That night I can’t sleep. I lie awake in bed for hours; my brain will not shut up. My thoughts are occupied on plotting ways to get back at that fucker. Maybe, I should carve “DICK SUCKER” on his car door and see how he likes it. Maybe, I should shit inside his car and smear it all over the place and see how he likes it. Maybe, I should set his whole fucking car on fire and see how he likes it! I’m raging with pure anger.

The next morning, I wake up and still have my headache from last night. My parents have already left for work and I see Luke in the kitchen, slurping Fruit Loops, I tell him what happened and he immediately gets up to go outside and take a look.

“Maybe, we could tape some paper over it to hide it?” he offers coming back inside.

“That’s a good idea, but not yet, I need to get some pictures for the insurance claim.”

“I think we should start thinking about fighting fire with fire,” Luke ponders. “He drives a dark blue Camaro, right? Maybe, we could bash a few windows in, slash his tires or dent it up for him.”

“I tell ya, Luke, I would love to do that, I really would, but it won’t solve anything, and I could get myself into some serious trouble.”

“I could do it,” he says, lifting one eyebrow sporting a sly grin.

“I appreciate it, but look at it this way; I already told the cops that I think Dirk is fucking up my Jeep. If anything happens to his car, I’ll be the first one they question.”

“How come they aren’t hauling his ass in and questioning him?”

“I don’t know. Maybe, they have and I don’t know about it? Or, they need some solid proof? I really don’t know...”

“This sucks, I feel bad, bro...” I have to appreciate these rare moments when Luke is not being an annoying little prick, and is actually on my side.

“Thanks, but right now it would be best to let the police handle this. Who knows, maybe Benny will have some luck with the video.”

I talk to Dad on the phone, he wants me to text him pictures and the police report so he can file the claim with the insurance company. He’s pretty pissed about this too, but tells me not to get any smart ideas and go off half-cocked and do something stupid seeking revenge. I tell him not to worry; I already went through that thought process.

An hour later my phone chimes, it’s Bill Moore, “Hey Kyle, Bill here. Benny told me everything. How are you doing?”

“I’m pissed off, but other than that, I’m okay.”

“Understandable. Listen, why don’t you come by the restaurant when you get a chance, I have something here that might help till you get your door fixed.”

“Okay, I’ll be right there.”

“See you soon.”

There’s nothing like driving through your hometown in a vehicle advertising that you are an ASS FUCKER. At least the Pizza Depot is not far from my house, but I do have to travel a few streets to get there.

My luck has me stop at the longest red light known to man. Of course, the car to my left is full of teenage girls, probably from my school. I try my best to avoid eye contact. I hear them honking their horn; force of habit has me look over to see them pointing and laughing. Yup, that’s me, I’m the Great ASS FUCKER. Why didn’t I just do what Luke said and tape paper over it?

At Pizza Depot, Bill has me follow him to the storage room. “Come back here with me, Kyle. A few years ago, we tried to get into home pizza delivery, but it didn’t pan out so well. The whole thing turned out to be more of pain in the ass than it was worth; most of our customers prefer to dine-in and play the games.”

He pulls out what looks like a huge flexible refrigerator magnet. It has the Pizza Depot logo and phone number on it. “Our drivers would put these on their doors when making deliveries. Maybe, this will hide the damage till you can get it fixed?”

“Yeah it will! Thanks Bill, this is awesome.”

Bill smiles, “No problem, Kyle. I told Benny to take as much time as he needs to find that video, I’m curious to know who did this too. I may look into seeing if I can press charges being that the crime was committed on this property.”

“You can do that?”

“I’m not sure,” he shrugs, “But, it can’t hurt to ask, can it?”

That evening at dinner, my dad explains that the insurance will cover the cost to have the door sand-blasted and repainted, but I will need to pay the $250 deductible. This horseshit is costing me a lot of money. Dad tells me, “They were asking a lot more questions this time because we filed a claim just last month for malicious damage.”

“Why is this Dirk doing this to you?” Mom asks, “Is this because of that fight last year?”

“Yeah, I think so...”

“Jerry, maybe, we should go and talk to this Dirk’s parents? It’s clear their son has anger issues and is nothing more than a bully.”

“No, Mom, don’t. That could make it worse. Let’s see if Benny can find the video.”

“Kyle is right dear, and what if, by some odd chance, it is not Dirk?” Dad adds.

Monday rolls around and school resumes after the Easter spring break. I have an appointment to take my Jeep to a collision shop to repaint the door next Monday, a week from today. I arrive at the school parking lot and find a spot. Justin and Dirk are in the next aisle, they take notice of the big Pizza Depot magnetic on my door.

“Hey, Pizza-Boy, did you bring me a large cheese and pepperoni?” Justin calls out. Oh, he’s such a funny guy. Dirk laughs, but doesn’t say anything.

This afternoon we have a school assembly in the auditorium, the entire student body is required to attend. Principal Krausburg has several announcements and the school band will be putting on a concert. Cool, no 5th and 6th periods, I like that.

After 4th Period, everyone is making their way to the auditorium. As soon as I enter the large, theater-like, room, I look around for Tiffany. Mrs. Gordon, the student counselor, seems to be in a panic and is rushing up the aisle. She grabs my arm, “Kyle, the microphone isn’t working. Can you run to the A/V (audio/visual) equipment room by the gym and grab the one from there?”

I’m not exactly sure where that is, but I can probably find it. “Yeah, sure.”

“Please hurry, we’re supposed to start in a few minutes.”

Donny is behind me and overheard Mrs. Gordon, “I know exactly where it is, Kyle. I’ll go with you.”

“Thanks.”

The gym is at the opposite end of the expansive high school building from the auditorium, Donny and I need to rush. We fast-walk our way through the, now empty, hallways away from the crowds funneling towards the auditorium.

“Did you have a good week off?” I ask.

“Yeah ... I guess,” he says, with little enthusiasm and rolls his eyes.

“You guess?”

“It’s Tyler, he’s been acting weird, like he’s avoiding me.”

“Did you two have a fight?”

“No, nothing like that. I don’t know ... I don’t get it.”

“That is strange...”

“You’re one the few people I can talk to that doesn’t judge me. Any ideas?”

I’ve had girls seek me out for advice with guys, guys seek me out for advice with girls, this is the first time I’ve had a guy seek me out for advice with a guy. Might be new to me but, relationships are relationships and people are people. I’m kind of flattered Donny feels he can confide in me about such things, everyone needs someone they can feel comfortable to talk to in their life.

“How do you feel about, straight out, asking him about it?” I ask.

“I’ve been considering that, but I’m still trying to think up how to approach it ... and even if I should?”

“I think you should. You mean something to each other, right?”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to end up making things awkward if it turns out to be nothing.”

“I see your point. Let’s think about it, maybe we can come up with something.”

“Okay...”

We find the A/V room by the gym; Donny knows exactly what shelf and what box to look in to find the cordless microphone. He checks to make sure it’s charged, it is. “How did you know where to find that so fast?” I ask.

“I was in the A/V Club last year.”

I have a slight issue I need to attend to, “Hey, I gotta take a quick leak, I’ll be right back.” I jog across the gym towards the boy’s locker room.

Donny follows me, “Yeah, me too.”

The toilets are at the far end of the empty locker room from where we entered. As we’re walking past the rows of stinky lockers and benches, I hear something from up ahead.

“What I don’t get with Tyler is-”

I stop, quickly turn and put my finger to my lips to quiet Donny. Ahead on the right, there’s a door that leads to the clean towel room, it’s open just a little bit, maybe 3-inches. I hear something coming from inside that sounds like a low moaning. We slowly creep up and stop to listen. It’s rather a quiet, but clear enough, “Oohhhh ... Mmmmmm ... Yesssss!”

I look back at Donny and questioningly smirk.

“Ohhhh! Feels so gooood...” followed by the unmistakable slurping sounds of someone giving a blow-job. By the sounds of these hearty slurps, someone is receiving one healthy sucking-on.

Upon hearing what I’m hearing, Donny’s eyebrows go up. I can’t believe this, is there really a beejer going on in there? This is too funny, but it makes sense, in a way. The entire population of the school is at the far end of the building, gathered in the auditorium.

I fish my phone out of the pocket of my jeans and make sure all its sounds are muted. Donny looks at me grinning like, no-way, Dude, I make a devilish grin and whisper, “I gotta know who it is. I’ll just slip my hand in and take a quick pic. I can always delete it after I see who it is.”