Chapter 24

People, Let’s Stop The War

Sun, Jan 11, 1970

Gimme an F!

Gimme a U!

Gimme a C!

Gimme a K!

What’s that Spell! Fuck!

What’s that Spell! Fuck!

What’s that Spell! Fuck!

Yeah, come on all of you big strong men,

Uncle Sam needs your help again.

He’s got himself in a terrible jam

Way down yonder in Vietnam

So put down your books and pick up a gun,

We’re gonna have a whole lotta fun.

And it’s one, two, three,

What are we fighting for?

Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn,

Next stop is Vietnam;

And it’s five, six, seven,

Open up the pearly gates,

Well there ain’t no time to wonder why,

Whoopee! we’re all gonna die.

Well, come on generals, let’s move fast;

Your big chance has come at last.

Gotta go out and get those reds -

The only good Commie is the one who’s dead

And you know that peace can only be won

When we’ve blown ‘em all to Kingdom Come.

And it’s one, two, three,

What are we fighting for?

Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn,

Next stop is Vietnam;

And it’s five, six, seven,

Open up the pearly gates,

Well there ain’t no time to wonder why

Whoopee! we’re all gonna die.

Huh!

Well, come on Wall Street, don’t move slow,

Why man, this is War-a-go-go.

There’s plenty good money to be made

By supplying the Army with the tools of the trade,

Just hope and pray that if they drop the bomb,

They drop it on the Viet Cong.

And it’s one, two, three,

What are we fighting for?

Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn,

Next stop is Vietnam.

And it’s five, six, seven,

Open up the pearly gates,

Well there ain’t no time to wonder why

Whoopee! we’re all gonna die.

Well, come on mothers throughout the land,

Pack your boys off to Vietnam.

Come on fathers, don’t hesitate,

Send ‘em off before it’s too late.

Be the first one on your block

To have your boy come home in a box.

And it’s one, two, three

What are we fighting for?

Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn,

Next stop is Vietnam.

And it’s five, six, seven,

Open up the pearly gates,

Well there ain’t no time to wonder why,

Whoopee! we’re all gonna die.

Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh

The F.U.C.K. Cheer & I Feel Like I’m Fixin’ To Die Rag, by Country Joe McDonald

While we were in NYC for the New Year’s Concerts, L.C. Beckett had called her old friend, Chairman Mao of China. She had overheard me musing about the Vietnam Mess. It turned out that L.C. was once again important to me.

Mao grew up in the Hunan Province of China, which is Inland, in the Yangtze River Watershed.

He tried & Dropped Out of These Schools:

1. The Police Acadamy

2. Law School

3. Economists School

4. Soap Production School. Huh, Soap Production? Must be a f/u to fail Soap Production School

Mao founded the Chinese Communist Party in 1921, shortly after the Russian Revolution.

After WW2, he founded the People’s Republic of China. (PRC)

On Mon, Dec 8, 1941, the Japanese attacked the British Crown Colony of Hong Kong. The Attack was actually at the same time as Japan’s Attack on Pearl Harbor, in the Hawaiian Islands. They also simultaneously attacked Singapore, Manila, Wake Island, etc. With Timezone’s & the International Date Line, some were considered Dec 7, some Dec 8, but they were all attacked at the same time, or as close as possible.

L.C. was in Hong Kong in 1941, as she was working with the British as a Spy. She was a supporter of Winston Churchill, as was Paul Degenhardt. She probably would have had an affair with Winston, but he wasn’t that way, but they remained Platonic Friends. But she was in Hong Kong to get some info that Winston wanted. He had visited her at Villa Cimbrone over the years, loving the Views.

Mao also happened to be in Hong Kong that morning. He was trying to convince the British to back his Communists, over the Nationalist Kuomintang Party, (KMT) which had Chiang Kai-shek as its leader.

L.C. was a friend of Vyacheslav Mikhaylovich Molotov, Joseph Stalin’s Foreign Minister. (1890-1986). Because of that, she often Traveled to Moskva (Moscow).

Mao & L.C. had 1st met in Moskva, in 1933. They had shared a bed for a few weeks then. Over the years, they had continued to hook up.

L.C. was 57yo & Mao was 48yo, when Hong Kong was invaded that Monday Morning, Dec 8, 1941. L.C. & Mao were languishing in Bed when the Bombs started dropping, but Mao quickly got both of them to safety. They escaped into the Hills, slowly making their way out of the Danger Zone.

During the War, L.C. gave Mao much “Comfort,” although her Comfort to Mao was probably beyond the “Comfort” that Paul Degenhardt gave to Winston Churchill.

When I had talked to L.C. on the Pan Am Boeing 747 Flight to NYC from Basel, she told me of her time with Mao. She thought it a wonderful idea to use her beloved Villa Cimbrone, as the location to end the Vietnam Mess.

She had a secret way to contact Mao, & was talking to him in minutes. She asked him to meet with President Nixon & UN Secretary General, U Thant. L.C. promised Mao that he would come out of the Talks smelling like a Rose.

Mao trusted L.C. implicitly, so he took a chance, agreeing to the Meeting.

Ali & I were flying from MSY to NAP A/P, Napoli, IT, in a Grumman Gulfstream Jet. It was going to be an 11 Hour Flight.

President Richard Nixon was aboard too. We were Flying in a Private Jet, as opposed to Air Force-1, due to the Top Secret Talks. Also aboard was U Thant, the UN Secretary General. Both had attended Super Bowl-4, U Thant as Nixon’s guest. They had watched the Game from the Kansas City Chief’s Owners Suite.

They were Lamar Hunt’s guests. That Sunday afternoon, Nixon, U Thant & I had greeted each other in Lamar’s Suite, having a quick word. That’s when Ali & I decided to go down behind KC’s Bench. It got crowded real quick with Secret Service there in Lamar’s Suite.

We were flying in a Special 1967 Gulfstream 2, equipped with an In-Air Refueling Pod on Top of the Jet. We Refueled twice during the Flight. What a rush. We had Fighters above us too.

The Jet was owned by my friends & Partners, David & NY Governor Nelson Rockefeller. They had been asked by the Government to have the Pod installed, when built in 1967. The Government paid all Costs, so the Rockefeller’s said sure. It had been used a few times as Air Force-2, which is for the Vice-Prez & the 1st Lady.

It was a long Flight. The Plane had a Couch, so all had a chance to take a Nap.

My 4 Hot-Shot Pilots were Flying us. They instantly bonded with Nixon’s 4 Secret Service Agents, all ex-Navy Seals. These guys were all the best, no matter the task.

Nixon & U Thant couldn’t get over me being the new owner of the NY Yankees. I told them I was the most flummoxed about the whole Deal. Ali & Babe Paley are the ones to blame. But can you blame them?

I told Nixon about Pete Rozelle’s utter refusal to talk about the NFL’s Black-Out Rule. I thought the Black-Out Rule, & the Rules against Free Agency, were bound to change soon. I was going to embrace changing both Rules ASAP.

Nixon saw my point. Remember, the final straw to change the NFL Black-Out Rule, was all Washington, DC, including Senators, the President, etc, were Blacked-Out for a Playoff Game with the Redskins. That would be in Dec, 1972.

From NAP to Villa Cimbrone was 37 miles, so we were flying there in a Sikorsky S-61 Helicopter. It was a Navy Chopper, but Painted Dark Blue, w/o anything showing military. It had a nice Tan Leather Interior. Must be for an Admiral. It was a 20 minute Flight.

Chairman Mao was Choppering up from the Mediterranean Sea below. His Chopper was Launched from the Deck of a Chinese Spy Ship. Pretty cool.

The Captain of the Chinese Ship was invited over to the USS America, a Kitty Hawk Class US Aircraft Carrier. The USS America, had been Commissioned in 1965, & spent most of it’s time in the Mediterranean. While we were in Italy, McDonnell F4F Fighter Planes were launched off the USS America, keeping watch over us.

While it was unusual for a President to travel by Private Planes, we felt the Secrecy was all important. The Secret Service had arranged for the USS America to Conduct a Drill off the Amalfi Coast.

No one knew who they were Re-Fueling, Flying Cover for, etc. They just obeyed Orders.

Gianni Agnelli had helped, paving the way with the Italians, as he was super influential in Italy.

The Choppers Landed on one of the Villa’s Lawns.

Nixon had 4 of his most trusted Secret Service Agents with him. All were ex-Navy Seals. Mao had 4 of his most trusted Security too. All were chosen because they would go to their graves w/o divulging what was due to happen the next few days.

This whole thing had come about quickly. I convinced Nixon to trust me. L.C. had done the same thing with Mao. Those who lived around Villa Cimbrone, had no clue of the Powerful Men that were gathered there, to bring Sanity back to Urantia. The Villa had high walls around it, keeping those inside its grounds hidden.

L.C. said she & Mao would be staying together, in L.C.’s Special Home. La Rondinaia was directly below Villa Cimbrone, hugging the Cliff.

The rest of us would stay in the Villa above. Ali & I took my favorite, the Blue Room. Nixon took the Green Room, while U Thant took the Red Room. All 3 were large Master Suites, that were built in the Moroccan Style. They were round, with the ceilings also rounded. They had Hand-Made, Painted Tiles all over. You couldn’t recreate it now w/o bringing in Master Artisans, if you could find them. The Rooms were reassembled at Villa Cimbrone in 1905, but they were much older, coming from other Villas, somewhere in Europe.

Those participating in the Talks were:

1. Me, Pug (18yo)

2. Ali (17yo)

3. President Richard Milhous Nixon (69yo) (1913-1994)

4. Chairman Mao Zedong (76yo) (1893-1976)

5. U Thant (UN Sec Gen) (60yo) (1909-1971) (he was from Burma/Miramar)

6. Gianni Agnelli (48yo) (1921-2003)

7. L.C. Beckett (85yo) (1884-1879)

We thought of including the Leaders of North & South Vietnam, but we decided they were irrelevant. We only needed one man to make a decision, & that was Mao.

Think about it, in 1970, Chairman Mao was an absolute Dictator. If he said Jump, you jumped.

It was beautiful weather, high above the Mediterranean, so I suggested we Ride Bikes around the Villa to loosen us up some. The Gardens & Views were not to be ignored.

When all the Pleasantries were over, we sat down to talk. Both Nixon & U Thant asked me to start the Talks, by mapping out the Stupid Moves the West, especially the good ol’ USA made after WW2.

While sitting along the Terrazza dell’Infinito, on one of the Stone Benches looking out on the Med, I started my intro. I had already shared a Doozie with all, so Mao should be in a Receptive Mood. I also had used Mindbending to relax Mao even more.

I then launched into my Take on the West’s Mistakes since the end of WW2.

1. The West/USA should have acknowledged that Communist China won their Civil War. They did that with our support during the War, as they were also fighting the Japanese for us. It was stupid to deny their Validity.

If we had done that, & had been able to have them as a Trading Partner all these years, who knows how things could have turned out.

2. The same thing regarding Vietnam. We never should have backed France when

they tried to reestablish their French Indochina Colony, which was Vietnam’s name

before. France was too weakened by WW2 to make a go of it again.

All the old Colonies in that region were eager for Self-Control after the War. We should have welcomed that. But we had some real crazies in America at that time. They were fanatical Anti-Commies. Even a hint of Socialism was thrown in the same Camp as Communism. It really caused us to make asinine decisions.

My final Take on the matter was, with the US admitting our Wrongs, couldn’t we all shake hands & just say, “So Sorry.”

L.C. had warned Mao about me. She told him that I didn’t give a shit about Proper Protocol. I couldn’t give a fuk.

Mao didn’t say a word for a long time, then he stood up, & proceeded to wrap me in his arms. He then picked me up off the ground, as he was amazingly strong. He held me at arm’s length away from him. Then he squished me to him again.