Chapter 15

George said, “Where’s the list?” Instead of arguing ... George is rather large ... I forked over.

“That’s quite the list,” George said. How do you want to do this?”

“We ... I ... thought we’d go with you.” Jackie was already looking fierce. George simply said... “Yes.”

Jackie wilted.

“Thought I was going to say no?”

“Yes,” she said.

“I could tell,” he replied. “I know better. I was married once.”

Jackie gave him the mom look. “What’s that supposed to mean?” she said.

“I wanted to have my own way one too many times.”

“I see ... married once.”

“Yup ... exactly.”

So ... we went grocery shopping with George ... and ... it was fun. Jackie embarrassed us in the carrots ... although ... the cucumbers were almost as bad.

The fruits and vegetables stocker told her, “You’re buying that!” He didn’t see her in the carrots.

George tried to get past the steak selection. “Too damn expensive,” he said.

I put a stop to that. I spent a couple of hundred on porterhouse.

“We were planning on meatloaf tonight. Agnetha makes the best meatloaf.” He noticed our inquisitive look. “Charles’ wife.” “She’s a Swede.”

“He introduced her as his wife ... never gave a name.”

“Charles is like that ... he thinks he runs the house ... she lets him ... think it.”

Evidently, the house has an invoice... 90 days same as cash. I, on the other hand, had to pay for my meat.

“Okay,” Jackie said. “Clothes.”

She meant WalMart ... George took her to Neiman Marcus ... the sales-guru knew him...

“Yes, George,” she said.

He took me to the Men’s Wearhouse. They are across the street from each other. It’s not London Bespoke but it’s very good.

I kept looking across the street, expecting to see Jackie outside with the store in bags. George notice.

“We have hours ... quit disturbing the tailor.”

“Thanks George. I thought we were going to have to knock him out.” “Right or left?”

“I don’t know ... right or left what?”

“Bambi?” the tailor hollered.

She came out from the alterations room ... and embarrassed me. Bambi is HOT. And she used her hand to find out I was a left. Her eyes got big as I got big. She slipped me her phone number when we were leaving.

George was impressed ... and a little jealous. “She never gave me her number,” he pouted.

It took hours ... and we weren’t done.

“Shoes,” George said.

“Is something wrong with Red Balls?”