Sixteen Scandals
Copyright© 2026 by Zappedfan
Chapter 8: Our Kisses Have Landed
Half an hour before Reveille on Friday morning, Nancy Peters, Hofstra ROTC Cadet Class of 1983, climbed into the air chase onto the mattress where her classmates were already in place and in uniform.
“Logistics?” She asked in a whisper as she slid the blackened cardboard behind her.
“Stationed,” Jenna answered in an equally low whisper., “We each took a Fire Guard shift last night so we could get it all up here without anyone else knowing.”
Nancy looked out at the empty male drying room and whispered, “Okay, let’s prepare the battlefield.”
Nancy, Jenna, Nellie and Susan each picked up a large ketchup squeeze bottle from the Mess Hall and put the nozzles through the louvers of the male drying room vent. Then they started to squeeze. But what came out wasn’t ketchup. It was a thin transparent liquid that was now coating the floor.
“Are you sure this is what the Chippendales use?” Nellie whispered.
“Yep, Johnson’s Baby Oil,” Nancy whispered, “You’ll see. Once they fall down and get it all over themselves, they’ll glisten like strippers at a bachelorette party.”
When the squeeze bottles were half empty, Susan whispered, “I think we can stop, the whole floor is coated.”
“No,” Nancy whispered, “Use it all. I want to see these guys oil wrestle.”
By the time the ketchup bottles were empty the baby oil was a centimeter thick on the whole floor.
“Counter-intelligence” Nancy whispered.
Jenna, slid a collapsed empty baby oil bottle through the louvers holding onto the neck. Then she blew into the neck inflating the bottle on the other side. She dropped the bottle down and it landed on a bench with the neck hanging over the edge. Then she forced the cap through the louver and it landed in the oil below the bottle.
“Now they’ll think one of them left the bottle and it spilled,” Nancy whispered.
“All this oil from that one bottle?” Nellie asked in a whisper.
“You think they’re going to do the math while they’re slipping. falling and getting coated?” Nancy whispered and the continued, “Of course, they’ll all deny to each other that it was their baby oil bottle. But that’s what they’ll expect each other to say. What guy wants to admit he even uses baby oil much less spills it?”
The Hofstra girls looked out at their handiwork.
“Now we wait,” Nancy said.
🎶FIGHTING SOLDIERS FROM THE SKY. FEARLESS MEN WHO JUMP AND DIE. A HUNDRED MEN WILL TRY TODAY. BUT ONLY THREE WEAR THE GREEN BERET🎶
The lights went on in the male latrines and a towel clad male cadet entered and went to a sink and started to shave.
@I hear that not one of them wears a bathrobe,” Jenna whispered, “They all come in with just towels around their waists.”
Three more male cadets in towels took places at sinks and also started shaving.
@I think this is a good look on them,” Nancy whispered, “I wish the towels were smaller, of course.”
One of the male cadets finished shaving and then lifted the towel to dry his face.
“Ah,” Jenna whispered, “Preview of coming attractions.”
The cadet walked into the drying room and suddenly was sliding across the floor.
“WHOAH!” he cried.
A couple of more male cadets came running. Big mistake.
“OOPS!” “HEY!”
Three male cadets were now wallowing in baby oil trying to get up.
Their female audience was suppressing giggles as they watched with glee.
On the female side of the air chase, Edna, Cindy and Claire looked quizzically at each other.
“What’s going on in there?” Mike Driver asked.
“Someone spilled baby oil on the floor!” A male cadet answered.
In the female drying room, Edna, Cindy and Claire’s jaws dropped, then they smiled broadly and gave thumbs up signs to each other.
Edna went in to take her shower. If this and the telescope was all there was, that’s not bad at all. In fact, it’s funny.
Mike spied the empty bottle on the bench and the cap below. He turned to the shaving cadets.
“Hey! Who left baby oil in here?”
They all shrugged.
“Well, it spilled!”
Mike turned to the three cadets on the floor.
“Leave those oily towels on the floor. I’ll get you some new ones. Take your showers and dry off. Then, after you dry off, leave those on the floor, too.”
Mike then turned to the shavers, “That goes for everybody. After you dry off, leave your towel on the floor to sop up this baby oil.”
Edna and Claire exchanged surprised looks in the shower. They had done the towel math.
In the air chase, Nancy put her finger to her chin innocently and turned to her classmates. She pointed in the direction of the hallway and pantomimed walking with her fingers and shrugged. Her three classmates nodded vigorously.
In the female showers, Claire leaned over to whisper in Edna’s ear.
“I guess that means that they’ll all be walking back to their bunks, down that long hall, butt naked,” she whispered.
“Do you think they’ll cup their hands over their torpedoes?” Edna whispered back.
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