Chapter 41

Amara stood in her living room, heart racing as she stared at her mother. Her hands, still covered with chitinous exoskeleton, crackled with hellfire; the only noise cutting through the stiff silence. More than ever, Amara felt like the spitting image of Evelyn; the rich scarlet of their demonic features, the sharp protrusions at the end of their wings, the unnatural glow of their eyes.

Thousands of questions flooded Amara’s thoughts, each accompanied by a web of complicated emotions. Why would her mother lie to her? Could all the pain of the last few months have been prevented had she known about her lineage?

Despite all her anger, despite all the confusion, one thought soon choked out all the others: in this moment, there were no more lies between them.

“Mom, I...” Tears filled her eyes, hissing against her hellfire. “Chloé’s dead!”

Amara ran forward, falling into her mother’s arms as she started weeping. Evelyn held her tight, lovingly stroking her hair as she gently guided Amara to the floor. She whispered sweet nothings as they settled in, and Amara lost track of how long they stayed there.

Minutes?

Hours?

Ever since this hellish transformation had started, Amara’s life had been a whirlwind of chaos. As angry as she wanted to be at her mother for hiding this, she was simultaneously thrilled that her first reaction had been love.

Eventually the tears dried up. Her thoughts drifted away from her memories, and back to the present. She still hugged her mother tightly around the waist, but their embrace didn’t stop there. They rested in a blanket of their own wings, spread open and gently encompassing each other. Their tails twisted together, and Amara only just now felt how hard she was squeezing her mother. Not only that, but her hands and horns were still cloaked in hellfire. She panicked, terrified of potential burns, when she realized that Evelyn’s hands were also swirling with flames.

True warmth had been nigh impossible to find ever since she discovered her heritage, but here, in her mother’s embrace, she found it again.

When she finally mustered the strength to pull away, sniffling and wiping away tears, her mother helped her stand. They moved to the couch, both dismissing their hellfire before they settled in.

“Tell me everything, love. From the beginning,” Evelyn whispered.

“W-well, I ... it all started a few months ago. I was feeling a little stressed, and the girls convinced me to, um, to go to a party. I wasn’t drinking, though, I promise!”

Evelyn laughed. “Dear, you’re a young woman at college. I don’t mind if you drink, so long as you’re safe.”

Amara blushed. Compared to everything else she’d been through, it felt strange to be ashamed about drinking. “Right, yeah. So anyways, even though I wasn’t drinking, I began to feel kinda weird. Being surrounded by all those students, all those hormones, it got me a little excited. I ended up grabbing Nick, and we, well...”

The story continued. Amara took great care to skip over the details when necessary, doing her best to explain her transformation. Her tail appearing, then her horns. Discovering she could control fire, then learning to fly, then fighting Vee on Halloween. She talked about Tessa, about the strange circles all over campus, and the Gate holding back the other planes. Discovering the cult, putting together a plan to stop them, and trying to use her powers to do so.

She swelled with pride as she talked about the ritual. How she’d broken free and saved the day, throwing Mr. Wellington and his demon back to Hell and saving the campus. Even ignoring the gangbang, she still fondly remembered that fight.

Being stuck in Purgatory was easy to talk about. Mending her friendship with Vee, looking for clues around the barren copy of Aurelius University, and eventually stumbling into Brandon’s plot. She shared how Tessa got them home, how they’d saved everyone on campus before camping out in the cafeteria. Her words slowed as she continued, but eventually there was nothing else to say; she explained how they’d lost the fight against Brandon. Being moments away from death, only for Chloé to stab Brandon in the back and sever his magical connection. Trying to get away, watching Chloé fall through the portal, and fighting desperately to pull her back. Losing the fight, Chloé shattering, the planar explosion. Tears welled up again as she relived that horrible moment, but she wanted her mother to understand.

“ ... And that’s it,” Amara said quietly, wiping away more tears. “Everyone else is trying to find a way forward, we had a meeting today and everything. I hung out with Vee a bit, she left, then you called.”

When she looked over at her mother, she caught her crying as well. “That’s ... Amara, no one should have to go through all that.”

They fell silent for a few minutes. Eventually, with nothing else to say, questions began bubbling to the surface. “Why didn’t you tell me, Mom? This would have been so much easier if I’d known why it was happening.”

Evelyn sighed. “I thought I’d never have to have this conversation. Truth be told, Amara, you’re not supposed to be a demon. I don’t know how this happened.”

“I’m sorry, what?!” Amara asked. “You’re a demon, right? Doesn’t it make sense that I’d be one too?”

“Things aren’t that simple, love; it’s not like there’s a Demon Gene that gets passed from parent to child. Demons are metaphysical creatures, their existence tied to the nature of their souls.”

“I don’t understand. What does that mean?”

Evelyn pinched the bridge of her nose. “Ugh, soul mechanics are complicated. This would probably be easier if I started from the beginning. I’ll try to keep it brief, but there’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

Amara nodded, her anticipation growing. For the first time since this started, she was about to get answers.

“I’m sure you’ve heard of the Garden of Eden?” Amara nodded. “It was a very real place. Adam was created as its first occupant, and through the same process, he was given a wife: Lilith. She was his equal in every way, they were even both made of the Earth. However, when it came time to consummate their partnership, Lilith didn’t want to lie underneath him; she felt it was an insult. Those that oversaw the Garden were shocked by this, they felt it was insubordination of the highest degree. As punishment, they cast Lilith into Hell, cursing her very essence. Her damned soul warped her into a demon; her curse ensuring that all her children would be born in her image.”

“I’m sorry, but how is this relevant to me?” Amara asked.

“Because...” Evelyn sighed again. “Lilith is my mother.”

“Wait, whoa, hold on.” Amara jumped up from the couch, eyes darting back and forth in shock. “That would mean ... Mom, how old are you?”

“Honestly? I’m not entirely sure,” Evelyn said, a faint smile crossing her lips. “I lost track after the first thousand years or so. Not to mention all the different calendars that humans have used over the centuries. At one point they realized they were out of sync, and tacked on, like, a hundred extra days? It was a mess.”

“Fuck. Fuck! That’s why you never talked about your family! They’re all demons!” Amara was pacing back and forth now, scanning through dozens of years of memories and piecing everything together.

“Correct. I was Lilith’s firstborn daughter, and I have many sisters. I hope, for your sake, you never meet any of them. What’s important, however, is—”

“Wait!” Amara spun to face her mother. “What about my dad?!”

Evelyn stood up, walked over to Amara, and calmly grabbed her shoulders. “Amara, please. I promise I’ll answer everything I can, but the context is important. Come sit down, let me continue.”

Amara huffed in frustration, then reluctantly nodded. “Okay, fine.”

Once they were settled in, Evelyn cleared her throat and resumed her story. “So, Damnation. All mortals are born as blank slates. Depending on the actions they take during their lives, one of two things might happen.”

“Right, Salvation or Damnation. Vee told me this,” Amara said.

“Exactly! Now, when Lilith was cast into Hell, she wasn’t directly turned into a demon. Her soul was Damned, and the presence of that Damnation warped her into the creature that now calls herself the Mother of Demons. This is how all souls work; regular humans can become demons if they’re sent to Hell, but that’s not the only way demons can be created.”

“I assume demons can give birth?” Amara asked.

“They can, but they do so under the shadow of Lilith’s curse. Any child born to a demon, if they’re lucky enough to be born with a soul, will see it Damned before they so much as take their first breath. In most cases, however, children are born without souls at all, effectively making them beasts of pure instinct.”

“But you said I’m not supposed to be a demon, right?”

“Your birth was ... unusual. After meeting your father, and falling in love with him, we both dreamed of raising a family together. Sadly, Lilith’s curse lives on in my veins, and guarantees Damnation for all my children.” Evelyn paused, reaching out and cupping Amara’s face. “It’s a terrible fate, Amara. I swore long ago that I would never condemn a child to such torture.”

Amara leaned into her mother’s hand, briefly closing her eyes to appreciate the warmth. “Clearly something changed, since you had me eventually.”

“The last time I saw your father, I made him a promise. I swore that, if I ever found a way to safely have a child, I would do so.”

“Hold on, so...” Amara scrunched her face, trying to make sense of what she was hearing. “If that was the last time you saw him, then my father isn’t my father? I don’t get it.”

“I’m a succubus, love. My body isn’t bound by the same laws that govern mortals. I have near infinite control over my physical form, and because I’m a demon of lust, I have suitably appropriate skills. Among them, the ability to sleep with someone and indefinitely store their seed within myself.”

“Eww! Mom!” Amara stuck out her tongue and gagged slightly.

“Oh hush, child. We’re both succubi, aren’t we? We don’t have to tell each other everything, but you’ll need to get used to talking about sex if I’m to help you through this.”

“Okay, yeah, but it’s still gross to think about. You’re my mom!”

Evelyn chuckled to herself, then continued. “So, your father. After leaving him, I kept to myself for a while. Eventually, through sheer coincidence, I stumbled into the opportunity we’d both always dreamed of: a chance to have a child free from Lilith’s curse. Nine months later, you were born.”

“Wait, what happened? What changed?”

“I can’t give you all the details yet, love. Believe me, I’m telling you everything I can, but there are forces at play greater than you understand.” Evelyn’s voice grew unusually serious, and Amara shivered at the weight behind her words.

What could possibly be so important that my mom can’t even talk about it?

“I can answer a different question, however. This is why I lied about knowing your father.” Evelyn paused, taking Amara’s hand. “If I’d given you any information about him, you would have gone looking. You would have learned that he died fifty years before you were born.”

Amara gasped. “Does that mean you know his name?”

Evelyn nodded. “Your father’s name was Vicente Calderón. Born in 1909, died in 1951. When you were finally born, I did everything I could to bury my demonic past. I wanted you to be your own person, free from the sins of your heritage, but that also meant I couldn’t give you the truth about your father.”

Silence fell as Amara quietly spoke her father’s name to herself. After all these years, after so many questions and awkward conversations, she knew who her father was.

She sat still for a few minutes, silently thinking over everything she’d just learned. “So, what now? If what you’ve said is true, then I was born with a mortal soul. Except mortals can’t become demons until they’ve died and been judged on their actions in life. I haven’t died, so that obviously didn’t happen, but I’m still a demon anyways.”

“Now you understand my confusion. Back when I still fed regularly, I possessed the ability to read souls, but it’s been nearly a century since I held that much strength.”

“Can’t you just get it back? Just go find a bunch of horny strangers and ... you know.” Amara did her best to avoid specifics; she was still trying to get used to the idea of her mother being a demonic sexual predator like herself.

“I don’t think you realize how much energy it takes to read a soul, Amara. Even as Lilith’s firstborn daughter, it took ages to refine the ability for myself. Heck, Anubis was so proud of their ability to reliably judge souls they made it central to their mythology. Sure, they weren’t literally weighing a heart against a feather, but it certainly made for powerful imagery.”

“Anubis?!” Amara gasped. “But we’re biblical demons! Isn’t that where the Garden of Eden comes from?”

“Shoot, that’s right,” Evelyn whispered to herself. “I’m not going to break down thousands of years of theology, but in brief, almost every religion is based in truth. The afterlife isn’t a single, monolithic structure; it’s shaped by thousands of divine entities whose strength can wax or wane in tandem with the faith of their followers. In our current day and age, Christianity has a fairly sizable presence, but that doesn’t mean their origin stories are truthful. When angels say Adam was the first man, they mean the first of their men. The Garden of Eden was basically just divine gentrification. It was likely built on the bones of previous faiths, and we’ll never learn what used to be.”

Amara stared at the carpet in front of her, eyes wide as she tried to process everything. Her father had a name, Anubis was real, as was the Garden of Eden, Lilith—THE Lilith—was her fucking grandmother. She wanted to keep talking, to learn as much as she could, but she hadn’t exactly started this conversation in the best mental state.

“Mom, I ... this is a lot.”

Evelyn put her arm around Amara’s shoulder and pulled her close. “I know, sweetie. I’m trying not to overwhelm you, but I also want to be open about everything. Believe me, I have so many questions about you, about your day-to-day life, because it still doesn’t make sense to me. Do you want to take a break?”

Amara nodded. “I’m exhausted. I want to collapse in bed and sleep for a week straight, but I’ll settle for a single night.”

“So you ... you still sleep?” Evelyn asked.

“I mean, yeah, obviously. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Demons don’t really sleep, dear. We can choose to put our bodies into states of suspended animation, but normally we only do this to blend in with humanity. We’re precision designed to be predators, and not needing sleep makes hunting much easier.”

“Great, more questions for the pile. Wait, so do you— you know what, no, I’m too tired for that.” Amara slowly rose to her feet, stretching out her many limbs while avoiding her mother, who did the same.

“Go get some rest dear,” Evelyn said. “I’ll be here in the morning, we can continue this then.”

Amara turned to her bedroom, then stopped. She pivoted quickly, jumping at her mother again and hugging her tight. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, mom. I was so scared, and I just ... I didn’t know what to say.”

They embraced one last time, wings overlapping and tails intertwining as Evelyn responded. “I can’t imagine how that must have felt. Thinking you were human, stumbling into all this ... I don’t blame you for a second, honey. I love you more than anything, and I’m just happy I can be here for you now.”

It took another minute before Amara found the strength to pull away. She nodded slowly to herself, then began walking to her bedroom. Each step was heavier than the last, the exhaustion of the day’s events finally catching up to her. She wanted to text Vee, to rant about everything she’d just learned, but she didn’t have the strength to pull her phone out.

Maybe, once I lie down, I’ll send a few texts...

Amara fell asleep the instant she crawled into bed.

Dull sunlight filtered through Vee’s window, gently rousing her from her sleep. Although her blinds were down, it was obvious they were in for another cloudy day. She grumbled as she slid out of bed, pulling on her slippers before heading for the bathroom. Checking her phone, she wasn’t sure what she hoped to see; given the last few months, no news was probably the best news. Despite that, she still hoped to see something from Amara, perhaps something simple about how she’s gotten a good night’s rest.

No such luck. The only notification waiting for her was from Nick, who she was meeting first thing today. They were getting together with Tessa to go over yesterday’s meeting, the same one she’d left early with Amara.

No doubt Tessa had some angry rant prepared.

It only took a few minutes to get ready. A quick text to Nick, who confirmed that Tessa was already over, and Vee was out the door. He didn’t live far, thankfully. It wasn’t snowing, but a stiff breeze was doing its best to cut through her coat. She spent the entire walk wishing she were with Amara, who single-handedly negated all the downsides of winter.

“Morning, Vee,” Nick said as he opened the door. “Come on in, I just brewed some coffee. We’re probably going to get breakfast soon, but there’s no rush. How’d you sleep?”

“Wrong question, Nick!” Tessa shouted from the couch. “Did you sleep at your place, or Amara’s?”

Vee rolled her eyes. “For the thousandth time, Tessa, it’s not like that. We’re just friends.”

“So? She and I are just friends, and we’ve done all sorts of nasty things. I’d happily tell you, but I’d hate to offend your delicate, angelic sensibilities.” Tessa laughed to herself before downing the rest of her coffee. Once she finished, the cup floated from her hands back to the kitchen. The coffee pot joined in the fun, pouring more coffee before the cup returned to Tessa.

“You’re free to ignore her, Vee,” Nick said with a smirk.

“Always do.” Vee pulled her shoes off before helping herself to the coffee. “So, what’d I miss at the meeting? How did everything shake out?”

“Do you mean after we had to reassure everyone that Amara’s not a threat? For the umpteenth time this week?” Tessa scowled before starting on her second cup of coffee. “She’s starting to lose all the good will she got for taking down the cult and saving everyone from the reaper invasion. You’ve seriously got to shorten her leash, Vee.”

“I’m not her keeper, Tessa. I’m just trying to help her through this as best I can.” Vee cupped her mug, warmth radiating through her as her voice grew quiet. “Some days it feels like she’s barely holding on. Like losing Chloé broke something.”

“She hasn’t got a fucking monopoly on grieving, Vee!” Tessa shouted. “I was right next to her when Chloé died, does she not give a fuck about me?”

“You know that’s not the case, Tessa,” Vee said. “Look, I can’t speak for her. Personally, I’ve been trying to remember that she never trained for stuff like this. I’m an angel, the Church has warned me since day one that I would see people die. You’ve got, what, like a coven or something? You’ve known about magic for a while, and you know what happens when shit goes sideways. She’s new to all this, it’s only been a few months, and we all know how emotional she’s gotten since she started transforming.”

“Still no excuse for acting like a child and snapping at everyone who looks at her,” Tessa grumbled.

Nick sat down next to Tessa before speaking up. “Look, we’re all doing our best, okay? It’s not like any of us are without support. I know it’s not ideal, but if nothing else, I can help Tessa with the other students, and I appreciate you spending so much time with Amara.”

Tessa made a face but stayed silent as she drank more coffee.

“So, the meeting?” Vee asked.

“Personally, I think it went pretty well,” Nick said, avoiding a dirty glare from Tessa. “Everyone is predictably scared, but most of the meeting was spent arguing details, which is good. It means there’s agreement on the bigger pictures.”

“Where are we at now?”

“Regarding the quad, and the general state of the campus, we’re going to say it was a freak microburst. Some people even volunteered to try and reshape the damage to look like it was caused by wind. It won’t completely explain the crater in the sidewalk, but it’s a start.”

“I’ll try to comb through my Enochian Texts to see if I have anything that might help. I’m overdue for a study session anyways.” Vee wandered closer and joined Nick and Tessa on the couch.

“As for everyone keeping watch and reporting suspicious activity, we’re off to a promising start. We’ve got someone that’s great with computers, and he’s going to set up a private, encrypted server that can host any messages related to this. We’ll have a group chat for everyone in the know, and a smaller chat for those of you directly handling the threats.”

“And everyone’s on board?”

“From what we can tell, yes. I hate to say this, but in some respects, the reaper attack put a lot of things in perspective. Planar incursions are a pretty vague concept; it’s far more visceral to see giant monsters attacking campus. If we have any holdouts, they’re keeping their doubts to themselves. We’ll just have to hope.”

“Are we going to continue having meetings once school starts back up?” Vee asked. “Having a support network will be crucial; we can’t overlook the mental burden of going through all of this.”

“That’s our current plan. Probably once a month, more frequently if needed.” Nick turned his mug around a few times, hesitating before he continued. “On our side of things, we need to do our best to look like we’re handling everything. If any of these students feel we’re not enough, it could be bad.”

“And that’s on top of going to classes, keeping our grades up, having a social life ... ugh.” Tessa finished her coffee and set the cup down. “Can we go get some food? I hate doing this shit on an empty stomach.”

“I second that,” Vee said, standing up.

It only took a minute for everyone to get their coats on, then it was off to the cafeteria. Vee huddled next to Nick when possible; his large, athletic frame made a fantastic windshield. As they walked, Vee tried to keep the conversation from drifting back to the meeting, while Tessa was continuing to pester her with questions about Amara.

“—But what if you used your magic book thing? Wouldn’t it make sense for angels to have magic that neutralized demonic tendencies? I’m just saying, it would be helpful if we had a way to calm her down for meetings and stuff,” Tessa said, her hands stuffed in her pockets. Despite the heavy wind, her shaved head and tattoos were fully on display.