Chapter 55: Please Don't Go!

June 8, 1983, Chicago, Illinois

"I'll do it if you want," I said to Beth as we showered on Wednesday morning. "You'll have to get whatever we need, as I'm completely clueless about it."

"I'm only slightly less clueless, but I'll speak to someone at The Pleasure Chest. I'm sure they have ropes or scarves or leather straps or handcuffs and someone who knows what to do."

"Handcuffs?"

"It's an option. But knowing those things is about the limit of what I know."

"Have you been to that store?"

"Yes. It's where I bought what Osco calls a 'personal massager', though mine has a more distinct shape!"

"Out of curiosity, if you have sex partners who satisfy you, why have a vibrator?"

"I like pleasure, and there are times when I'm horny and can't get together with someone. I mean, you're only available once or twice a month, and while I'm no prude and wouldn't judge, I don't have that many sex partners."

"And you've ruled out your budding lawyer and doctor from the synagogue?"

"The one in law school graduates Thursday," Beth said. "The other one has two years to go in medical school."

"Which means?"

Beth smiled, "That for now, you and I continue to fuck, and if things do develop with Joshua, then things change for you and me. It's totally casual for you and me, and we can be friends if we stop screwing. I think we're both mature and sensible enough to keep it platonic."

"I think so, too," I agreed.

We finished in the shower, dried ourselves, dressed, and then went downstairs to have breakfast. After breakfast, Beth, Jack, and I got into the car for the drive into the Loop. We swung by the tailor shop to drop Beth, then Jack and I headed for the Hancock Center.

"Not to be a complete pig, but Beth has an amazing rack!" Jack observed.

"I have zero complaints," I replied. "She's a great girl, but I'm simply her 'Goy boy toy' because she wants to marry a Jewish guy and honor her culture and faith. In the future, we'll be friends, and she'll refer people to me, and I'll refer people to her. I have a few leads with lawyers that she's given me. I sent each of them a prospectus but haven't heard back yet."

"Same with the cops in Kansas, right?"

"Yes. I figure sometime in July, if it happens. Landing the law firm here was a big help because I have more money under management. I sent updated documents to the detective I met, and he forwarded them to the members of his union board. Everything is going better than I ever planned at the moment."

"You say that as if you expect something bad to happen."

"Expect? No. Suspect? Yes. That's the entire point of hedging and using covered options. And I have taken some positions that didn't return what I expected and a few that were stopped out with small losses. The key is being agile and not getting caught flatfooted if the market moves the wrong way, which it can do if some major world event occurs."

"I think I know the study materials well enough to answer questions."

"OK. Let's set aside some time for me to quiz you, then you can ask Kristy's dad for a runner position. That said, Newton will be very unhappy if you leave too soon."

"Does that really matter?"

"In the larger scheme of things? No, because he's not a Suit and, therefore, is lower on the totem pole than Bianca will be when she starts next week."

"I heard that the order of the images on totem poles isn't standardized, and the position doesn't mean anything, or in some cases, the first image on the bottom is the most important."

"Could well be," I replied. "I was simply using the metaphor. I think I'll refrain, given what you just said."

"Have you seen any discrimination against the Oriental girls you've dated?"

"Not overt, anyway," I replied. "I do see discrimination against blacks and Hispanics regularly, including at Spurgeon and Hart-Lincoln. Hell, just look at the Chicago City Council and the Mayor. And Bernie Epton ran a blatantly racist campaign! Honestly, I think Orientals and people from India more or less fly under the radar. I'm sure there are biased people out there, but I haven't run into them the way I have with blacks or Hispanics."

"You do have a thing for Asian girls, whether it's from China, Japan, or India!"

"So sue me," I chuckled. "Bianca is Mexican."

"You kicked the Aryan girl to the curb!" Jack teased.

"More like she kicked me to the curb because I dropped everything to help Bev. Anna felt it meant Bev and I would end up together in the future, even if I were married to someone else. Marrying Bev was NEVER in the cards once all the shit went down with her running away from St. Louis. But there was no way I wouldn't help her. Anna couldn't deal with it."

"Her loss, I'd say!"

I shrugged, "As I said to someone else, our views on life and the future weren't compatible. Better to find that out right away than down the road."

"That's the same thing that happened with Haley, right?"

"More or less," I agreed as I pulled into the parking garage.

We parted at the steps, with Jack going straight to the freight elevator and me walking up the steps to take a passenger elevator. I still found it silly, but it wasn't my company. If and when I ran my own shop, I wouldn't have the distinction between 'Suits' and 'Staff' that Spurgeon maintained.

I completed my usual morning tasks, and just after 8:00am, I received a call from Kendall Roy in Compliance.

"First, the SEC closed out the investigation of your currency trades. That's good, but you know it never ends."

"So I've heard," I replied.

"Just continue to keep meticulous notes."

"Will do. I have a question for you — how will the SEC look at contact with the Soviet government?"

"The way every US government agency would — askance. What are you up to?"

"I asked for trade information from their Embassy in DC. I discovered through that contact that they actually export tractors and have plants in Wisconsin and Louisiana."

"Where are you going with that information?"

"Mainly, it's curiosity, but it is in my remit. I'm also curious and want some insight into Russia, given something big is likely to happen when Andropov dies, though it might be the guy after the guy after him. Major changes in the Soviet Union could have a massive impact on the global economy, trade, military spending, and so on."

"Keep VERY detailed notes and make sure you send them to Legal on a weekly basis so they aren't blindsided. I'd like copies, too, but that's up to you."

"I'll share, as I'm totally out of my depth here and don't want to get in trouble with the FBI or some other agency."

"Wise," Mr. Roy declared. "Before I let you go, I saw you haven't rescheduled your sensitive leave. It's June, so you want to give some serious thought to that, as you absolutely have to take ten consecutive trading days before the end of the year."

"I'll figure it out in the next week or so," I replied.

"Good. Don't mess that up because it'll land you in hot water with Spurgeon. It's not an SEC requirement at this point, but it's one of our defenses against claims of market manipulation."

I almost laughed out loud because it would be trivial for me to work in concert with someone or simply ensure my positions were properly protected before I took the time off. But I wasn't doing those things, so it didn't really matter, and I was in no position to manipulate the market. That said, Matheson, Spurgeon, Thiele, and others could and it made more sense for them.

"I won't mess around with it," I said.

"Thanks, Jonathan," Mr. Roy said.

We ended the call, and I returned to my research. I worked out at lunch, had a relatively quiet but productive afternoon, then headed to the hospital to see Keiko, stopping to pick up the book she'd requested.

"How are you feeling?" I asked.

"Like crap," Keiko replied. "But better than Friday. I still have a fever, but it's under control, according to Doctor Morrison. The biggest problem is that between the chemo and the antibiotics, my digestive system is a total wreck."

"What can they do about that?"

"Not much, though supposedly yogurt with active cultures helps, and I can keep that down. But anything other than liquids or yogurt makes me throw up. According to Doctor Morrison, it's normal for that to get worse before it gets better, especially with antibiotics."

"Is there anything I can do? I did bring you The Stand."

"Thanks. Nothing at the moment besides your visits. What are you doing on Friday?"

"I was going to discuss that with you," I said. "Ellie had planned an end-of-the-semester baseball game, but I'm not sure."

"Because of me?" Keiko asked.

"Yes. I was wondering if I should call it off, but even if I don't, I'm going to retire."

"Also because of me?"

"Well, unless you plan to allow me to play around after we get engaged if we decide to do that!"

"Fat chance!" Keiko said, laughing softly, which I thought was a good sign.

"The exact response I expected!" I said with a smile. "And one with which I have no argument or disagreement."

"Then make Friday your swan song or final game or whatever analogy you want to draw. You know I don't have a problem with it now."

"Does what you said before still hold true? That if I ask, you'll say 'yes'?"

"You know I think we should wait to see what happens, right? Not to mention, I'm not going on a honeymoon anytime soon."

"I know."

"But yes, I would. Please wait, but I won't say 'no' if you decide not to."

"I'll take it under advisement," I said,

"Of course you will!"

"How is your blood?"

"Still bad, but again, to be expected. My oxygen saturation is better, but my white count is basically non-existent. That should begin to change in the next week. And the real test is next Monday when they report my blast count."

"What's supposed to happen?"

"It should either be about the same or go up only slightly."

"Do you want me here when Doctor Morrison gives you the report? I can go into work early on Monday."

"Yes, please."

"Then I'll be here by 3:00pm on Monday.

"I really appreciate it!"

"Do you have a preferred time for me to visit on Saturday and Sunday?"

"The afternoons are best. I've been going to sleep by 8:00pm every night this week."

"Do you feel up for a walk?"

"Not really. The physiotherapist made me get out of bed after lunch, and I was totally beat, not to mention chilled because of the fever."

"Just do what they say, please."

"I am, but I feel horrible all the time."

"I wish there was something I could do, but sadly, I don't think there is."

"You come to see me every day, and that's important, even if I sometimes seem as if I don't appreciate it."

"None of this is your fault," I said. "But I'm here for you in any way you need me."

Keiko smiled, "I know, and I'm very happy about that."

June 10, 1983, Chicago, Illinois

Friday was a normal day at work, and at the end of the day, I went to see Keiko for our daily visit before heading to Loyola to meet Ellie. I'd debated canceling, but in the end, decided that I'd committed to it, and as Keiko hadn't expressed any concerns or even implied any, I decided that I would have what I expected to be a last crazy fling.

There was still the promise I'd made to Deanna and Ceci, and I'd keep that commitment, but once I had, then I'd make a commitment of another type to Keiko. Despite my strong feeling that I was too young to make that kind of commitment, I couldn't let Keiko slip away as I had Huifen. That had worked out OK, as I felt Keiko and I clicked even better than Huifen and I had, but I wasn't going to take the chance.

As I pulled into the Visitor's parking lot at Loyola, I wondered if I was treating Keiko properly, but as I got out of the car, I reminded myself what she'd said. The thing that made me question myself again was whether my expressed reluctance to be in a committed, monogamous relationship had led Keiko to allow me more freedom than she preferred, but in the end, I remembered how she had come into my life — as Ellie's friend, simply looking for a very pleasurable encounter.

"Hi!" Ellie exclaimed when I walked into the lobby of the dorm.

"Hi," I replied. "Still the same plan?"

"Aurelio's for pizza, then a private party!"

"If you didn't want to use your dorm, we could go to the house. Everyone will be out until at least midnight."

"That works!"

"How many girls?" I asked.

Ellie smirked, "Nine! It's baseball, after all!"

"You do realize that nine times is pushing the extreme limits!"

"I do, but we have tomorrow morning, right?"

"I don't have anything to do until around 11:00am."

"I do have to ask you something I should have asked about before — do you have a problem with a black girl participating?"

"Why would I?" I asked.

"Some people are that way," Ellie said. "It doesn't even have to be racist, just a preference. I mean, I know your preference! If I could line up eight Oriental or Indian girls, you'd be in Heaven!"

I couldn't help but laugh, "You might have a point! To give you a direct answer, no, I don't have a problem. In any event, with that many girls, I need to stop somewhere and get rubbers."

"Actually, when I first came up with the idea in April, I insisted all the girls go to the clinic and get the Pill. They did, and the clinic also gave them all VD tests. Miranda, Kasey, Meg, and I had one, too. You had one, right?"

"Yes, in February."

And since then, I'd only been with girls I'd been with before, all of whom had tests at one time or another, except Izzy, who had been a virgin.

"I do have one question for you," I continued. "What about Bob?"

"Just a casual date," she replied. "I wouldn't cheat any more than you would."

"OK. I had to ask. Mind if I ask about the other girls?"

"They're all Freshmen," Ellie said. "Kimberly, the black girl, is a nursing student, is almost as tall as you, and plays basketball; Nicole, a French major, is a short redhead with green eyes; Amanda, a stats major, is an average height blonde; Laura, another blond, though short like Keiko, is an English major; and Dawn, a tall girl with brown hair, is pre-law."

"And you were clear with them what happens at your baseball games?"

"Absolutely! And they all agreed to play, and they know it's public, so to speak. You know my kink!"

I chuckled, "I do — watching and being watched. I do have one important thing to tell you, and that this is my last time stepping up to the plate. You'll need to find a new starting pitcher in the future."

Ellie frowned, "I figured that would happen at some point. Keiko?"

"That's part of it, yes, but even without her, I've discovered I'm more interested in one-on-one sex than I am in groups."

"That sounds like you're rejecting Bianca's plan."

I nodded, "I am, but not because I think there's anything wrong with it, but because a regular monogamous marriage seems right to me."

Well, minus having a kid with Bianca, which was something I'd have to discuss with Keiko again before I changed our relationship. That was something I absolutely had to take into consideration and which had slipped my mind during my earlier consideration of what to do.

"I'm not surprised," Ellie said. "If you change your mind, I'm the next in line!"

"Is that ABBA?"

"Yes. It's Take a Chance on Me. Anyway, the girls will meet us here in about twenty minutes, and we can head to Aurelio's. Miranda and Nicole have cars, so we won't have a problem with getting everyone into a car."

"With nine girls, I have to ask how you plan for this to work."

"I was thinking we start with a 'get to know you' round where each girl gets to make out with you for two minutes, fully clothed, and just kissing. Because there are nine of us, each girl gets a turn where she has twenty minutes max — five minutes of sixty-nine, five minutes with her on top, five with you on top, five any way she wants. Whenever you cum, you lick her for the rest of the time.

"That's three hours, and if we factor in rest time, we'd finish around 1:00am, though earlier if physiology limits things. In that case, the remaining girls go in the morning. We all have sleeping bags or blankets and pillows, so we can sack out in your room or the basement. Any girls who don't get a turn tonight have a chance to sleep with you overnight, if they want. If it's more than two, then draw cards. When we're all done tomorrow, you wash each of us in the shower."

"I'll be a prune after forty-five minutes in the shower!"

"OK, so maybe that wasn't well thought out!"

"May I give an honest critique that is not a complaint?"

"Sure."

"Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but nine girls are too many. It takes away the game part, at least if everyone gets what amounts to an equal turn. Just from my perspective, it's almost like ... an assembly line."

Ellie frowned, "I think I got carried away; I'm sorry. What do you want to do?"

"I'm not sure there's a good solution, really," I said.

"Maybe Miranda and Kasey would agree to skip if you gave them a night each?" Ellie suggested. "They both live in the area. Meg is going home to California tomorrow."