Chapter 53: The Best Course of Action

June 4, 1983, Chicago, Illinois

On Saturday, after breakfast, I walked Miranda to the train so she could go home, then Bianca and I did the usual Saturday shopping. When we finished shopping at Jewel, we stopped at the dry cleaners to drop off and pick up my suits and shirts. After lunch, I called Teri to confirm the time for the concert and that I'd pick her up for dinner at 5:00pm. When the call ended, I packed a bag with a change of clothes and some reading material, then headed to Rush-Presbyterian to spend the day with Keiko.

Her induction chemotherapy was complete, so she only had an IV with D5LR, which was the sugar and electrolyte mix. She was feeling terrible and looked haggard, which didn't surprise me, as she'd looked progressively worse each day. But, as far as I could tell, the worst was behind her as she'd begin recovering. The main question was how effective the chemotherapy had been.

"How are you?" I asked.

"Lousy," she said. "I'm cold, even with warm blankets, my insides feel like they've been scrambled, and you know the gross parts."

"Sleep as much as you need to," I said. "I brought plenty to read, and I'm happy with just being in the room with you."

"You don't have to stay," she said.

"You're right. I don't, but I intend to unless you tell me to leave."

"Violet was here for about twenty minutes this morning, but I was so tired that was all I could manage."

"And the other girls are visiting, right?"

"Yes. What did you do last night?"

"We had dinner at Maxim's, saw WarGames, then went to Oberweis for ice cream. The movie was entertaining but kind of silly. Are you feeling up for a short walk?"

"No. I don't think I could get out of bed if I wanted. They put in a catheter, and I have to use a bedpan. I had a transfusion this morning, which should help."

"Did it make you feel better at all?"

"Not the way it did before, no, but my oxygen saturation level is up. I'll have another one later in the week. Do you mind if I close my eyes?"

"Not at all. I'm here for whatever you need."

Keiko closed her eyes, and I took out the most recent edition of The Economist and began reading. The lead article was on Britain under Margaret Thatcher, who I had predicted would win the upcoming election in a landslide over Labour.

Keiko was woken about an hour later by the nurse. The nurse checked Keiko's vitals, then checked the catheter, which had to be uncomfortable given where it was inserted. After the check, Keiko went back to sleep almost right away.

I finished The Economist and began reading the latest edition of Crain's, which covered the completely dysfunctional Chicago city government, with no end to the standoff in sight, and predictions it would last at least until the next election. That didn't bode well for Marcia, and when I spoke to her, I'd advise her to apply for what was, in effect, her old job.

The special election to replace Washington in Congress would be held on August 23, and I fully expected Charles Hayes to win with something close to 95% of the vote against token Republican opposition and an independent candidate. Given that, Marcia getting in touch with him immediately made sense, as there really was no risk in doing so. That would be better for her and, obviously, better for me, though I was more concerned about her.

When Keiko woke up around 4:30pm, I asked her about a walk, and she declined, which didn't surprise me. Wanting to be supportive, I didn't argue with her, as I was positive the medical staff would be the 'bad cop' and force her to get out of bed at some point, probably soon.

"You know, it's silly for you to sleep here in that uncomfortable chair," Keiko said.

"Actually, the chair is very comfortable," I replied. "I slept fine last weekend."

"Seriously, Jonathan, I'm sleeping most of the time. Go home, come see me tomorrow before your concert, then evenings after work; well, after your final exam on Monday."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I'm just too tired to do anything, and even talking for more than five minutes wears me out."

"I feel as if I'm abandoning you," I replied.

"You've come here every single day since I was admitted! How is that abandoning me?"

I smiled, "I didn't say it was, just that it felt that way."

"A typically Jonathan thing to say! And you need to take care of yourself. I have a swarm of doctors, nurses, and techs taking care of me. Right now, knowing how much you care about me is the most important thing. Come see me in the morning, OK?"

"Yes," I said, reluctantly acquiescing to her request. "I'd kiss you, but that's off-limits, right?"

"A peck on the lips is safe; I asked Doctor Van Zant this morning. But right now, you can't take off your mask in the room."

I nodded, then squeezed her hand in lieu of a kiss.

"I'll come by tomorrow morning," I said.

Keiko smiled, then closed her eyes, as even the short conversation had seemingly worn her out. I picked up my bag and left the room. Nobody was expecting me home, so I stopped at the pay phone and called Bev to see if she and Heather were busy. She wasn't, so I suggested I come by, and we take Heather for a walk in Grant Park, which was easily accessible by foot from the apartment over the tailor shop.

"How is Keiko?" Bev asked when I arrived.

"In bad shape, but supposedly she's through the worst of it, and now she begins recovering from the chemo. We'll know how well it worked on Monday afternoon. Shall we head for Grant Park?"

"Yes."

I carried Heather's stroller down the steps, and after Bev locked the door, she brought Heather down and we put her in the stroller and began walking east towards the lake.

"Do you think Keiko would mind if I visited?"

"No. Just coördinate with Bianca because we're trying not to overwhelm Keiko. Violet was there this morning."

"OK. I'll call Bianca," Bev agreed.

"How are things with Glen?" I asked.

"Good. He let me know you mentioned you'd help him find a job if he decided to move to Illinois."

"I have contacts, though I don't know how much weight they might carry. But I'll certainly use every one of my limited contacts to help. What does Heather think?"

"She's a baby!" Bev protested.

"OK, yes, but does she like him?"

"She doesn't fuss when he holds her, so I'd say she does."

"So, now what?" I asked.

"He gives his notice on Friday, which is the last day of school. I checked with Beth and she's OK if he moves in with Heather and me, though it would only be temporary."

"That serious?"

"I believe the little bundle of joy in the stroller is evidence that we already did that!"

"Obviously, but you know what I meant!"

"We discussed the future," Bev replied.

"AND?"

Bev laughed softly, "You're cute when you're frustrated!"

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Miss Newton!"

"We discussed getting married," Bev said. "And if he asks, I'll say 'yes'."

"I think that's a good thing for both you and Heather," I said. "But that also raises the question of reconciling with your parents."

"I don't want to," Bev declared.

"You sound like a petulant toddler," I replied. "Not that I have a lot of experience with toddlers!"

"Why is that so important to you? You're estranged from your grandparents."

"Keiko suggested I reconcile with them, something her grandfather would expect, and I agreed to try."

"My dad will completely lose it if he finds out about Glen being Heather's dad."

"Don't you think they'll eventually find out? And wouldn't you prefer it to be on your terms, not theirs?"

"How would they find out?"

"Well, they might put two and two together and come up with Glen, but more likely, the private investigator will look for you again in a month or two. Eventually, they'll find you. I believe the only reason we avoided it was that your dad ran out of money to continue the intensive surveillance. You have a job, Heather is in daycare, you own a car, and so on. Eventually, you'll be found unless you change your name, Social Security Number, Heather's name, and so on, and have the court seal the records. Short of Witness Protection, I don't see that happening."

"Isn't it up to me?"

"I think so, and you obviously think so; your parents do not think so. I believe you're better off getting in touch with them and telling them what's going on versus them finding out from the investigator. You know I'll help you in any way I'm able."

"Would you talk to them?"

"I don't think your dad is in any mood to have a conversation with me, and he'll accuse me of hiding or sheltering you."

"Your mom is still on good terms with my mom, right?"

"Yes, though I'm not sure she's the best one to speak to your mom, given your relationship with Glen and her past relationship with him. You could always write a letter and use my house as a return address. But in the end, it won't matter because I believe they will track you down. I won't belabor the point now, but you should call your parents."

"How did your mom react?"

"I haven't spoken to her for two weeks. I plan to call her tomorrow. I need to fill her in on Keiko. But I think she'll respect Glen for stepping up to help you with Heather."

"You know, I forgot to ask, but how did things go with Mr. Hart?"

"Great, actually. Several of the partners and senior associates decided to put their money into my fund in addition to the retirement funds."

"You're doing amazing, Jonny. I'm really proud of you."

"Thanks. Do you know Kayleigh O'Connell?" I asked.

"The paralegal? Why?"

"She gave me her number on Thursday after she notarized the forms."

"She's the granddaughter of Thomas Hart and is really sweet. Are you going to call her?"

"My life is a little too complicated at the moment, not to mention how I feel about Keiko."

"Before she got sick?" Bev asked. "Or after?"

"Before," I replied. "Her diagnosis just forced me to think clearly and seriously about how I feel about her."

"Just don't make any rash decisions."

"Who are you talking to?" I asked. "Do I ever make rash decisions?"

"My sixteenth birthday!" Bev smirked.

"That was YOUR decision! I was just along for the ride, to so speak!"

"YOU!" Bev squealed.

"Sorry," I replied with a goofy smile. "But the question remains, do I ever make a rash decision?"

"No, you're very analytical."

"So, do you think I'd act rashly?"

"No, but cancer diagnoses are pretty intense. Even the most rational people don't act rationally."

"Point taken," I replied. "And I'll admit I've been feeling a bit odd and out of sorts, but everything I've done has been considered and careful. That was true when I helped you when you were in Kansas. Ask Bianca — methodical, logical, calm, and considered. About the only time I wasn't that way was when Heather was born."

"You were perfectly calm!"

"On the outside, to be strong for you! On the inside, I was more than a little freaked out by the whole process."

"You were amazing the whole time, including at the hearing and after. Just be smart, Jonny."

"I will be."

"Is it OK to ask what happens after Monday?"

"All I know is there's a recovery period, and then she has a second round of chemo called the consolidation phase, intended to wipe out any cancer left after the round she just had. In some cases, there's a third phase, the maintenance phase, which depends on the results of the first two phases."

"And then she's cured?"

"The goal is remission, which means they don't find any cancerous cells. If the patient stays in remission for five years, then they're considered cured. In Keiko's situation, about half the patients survive five years."

"Half?"

"That's the number. All we can do is wait and see."

It was a beautiful day, with mostly clear skies and temperatures in the mid-70s. We walked a circuit around Grant Park, then returned to Bev's apartment. When she said she was going to put Heather down for a nap, I said 'goodbye', we hugged, and I headed home to find an empty house. Nobody would be home before 11:00pm, and I considered what I should do, deciding to take a chance on calling Marcia. I asked her to have dinner, and we agreed on Lou Malnati's for pizza.

I picked her up, we had a nice meal and a good conversation, and during dessert, I gave her my advice about applying for a position with putative Congressman Charles Hayes.

"I'm not sure I could do that," Marcia replied. "I accepted the job, and I should at least try to do it."

"I agree, but is the City going to do anything? And being in receivership, without some significant action from the City of Chicago or the State of Illinois, you're simply going to be beating your head against the wall. Apply for a senior position in future Congressman Hayes' staff and see what happens."

"What would I say about why I wanted to leave?"

"That you preferred a role as a Congressional staffer to a role with the city. And there are several other legislative districts where you could look for a job. I'm positive they'd be interested in someone with good experience. You want to effect change, and I don't see that happening in the Chicago Housing Authority. Be honest — do you?"

"No," Marcia admitted. "I don't. It's worse than I expected, and I don't see it improving any time soon."

"Then I think, given you have other opportunities, you should look into the possibilities."

"You're probably right; let me think about it."

We finished our dessert, and I drove Marcia to her townhouse, where, as I expected, she asked me to come inside, with the implication of spending the night. I wasn't really in the mood because Keiko was on my mind, not to mention I had a busy Sunday, visiting her, dinner with Teri, and the concert, not to mention needing time to study for my final exam.

"Raincheck?" I asked.

"Is that just a way of saying 'no' politely?"

I laughed, "Yes, but no. It was a polite way of saying 'no', but it wasn't intended as 'never'. I just have a lot on my mind. I have a busy day tomorrow, and I have a final exam on Monday night. As the dumb cliché line goes — it's not you, it's me. But it really is me and my situation, not you."

"Keiko?"

"That's a big part of it because I'm seriously concerned about her, and I spend a lot of time thinking about her situation."

"I can't even imagine what she's going through, and I don't want to."

"Which is why I, and her other friends, need to be there for her. Granted, right now, she spends most of her time sleeping, but given the first round of chemo was completed Friday, she should be on the upswing. Of course, that's easy for me to say when she has another month in the hospital and, at some point after that, the next round of chemo. I promise I'll call, and we'll get together again soon."

"I understand," Marcia replied.

I double-parked, walked her to the door, we exchanged a quick kiss and hug, and after she went inside, I headed home.

June 5, 1983, Chicago, Illinois

"I see you didn't stay the night," Bianca said when she came into the front room where I was studying on Sunday morning.

"Keiko strongly encouraged me not to simply sit in the recliner next to her bed all day, given she's mostly sleeping and becomes run down simply by talking for more than about five minutes. They gave her a transfusion yesterday, which should help, and they'll give her more until her blood count is in an acceptable range, though there is some limit which I don't fully understand."

"Did you ask?"

"I will when I see Doctor Morrison on Monday afternoon. I'm going in early so I can see Keiko before my exam."

"Have you studied enough?"

"I did all the practice problems and had no trouble with them, and I've reviewed every chapter. With my homework and mid-term scores, I can earn an A with a grade as low as 82% on my final. I'm confident I can do that."

"What did you do last night?"

"Had dinner with Marcia but then came home."

"You seem a bit out of sorts," Bianca observed.

"Because I am. This is all new to me, including how I'm feeling."

"You've never known anyone who was really sick, have you?"

"No, nor has anyone close died. There was Paula, but she and I weren't close, even though we had fooled around."

"Close in proximity, not emotionally," Bianca replied. "You and the girls who live here are both. Well, not Shelly now, but in the past."

"True."

"Before I forget, how are you handling the hot tub installation?"

"The foreman will be here at 6:00am on the 13th, so I'll see him before I head into work. Deanna will be here in the mornings all week, as her shifts at Venice Café are all in the afternoon and evenings. If there are any problems, they'll speak to her, and she'll call me. I'm positive I can handle everything over the phone because Marcus Washington and I worked really well together on the Spurgeon expansion."

"The same guy does commercial and residential?"

"I suspect he was assigned because of the past relationship. And it's not as if he'll have to be here a lot. The most time-consuming and difficult part of this entire project is permitting and inspection. Building a deck isn't rocket science, though I wouldn't want to try it because I don't have that particular skill set. Start to finish, including inspections, it'll take ten days, and part of that is waiting for the concrete footers and slab to dry."

"I didn't have a chance to say that the flowerbeds look really nice. Who's going to maintain them?"

"I have a card from the landscaping company that did the work; they provide full-service landscaping, including lawn mowing, seeding, fertilizing, weeding, and so on. All stuff I could do but simply don't have time to do. Mom and I had a garden at home where we grew vegetables, so I know how; it just makes more sense to pay someone else to do it."