Home ยป Forum ยป Story Discussion and Feedback

Forum: Story Discussion and Feedback

the private

adejun ๐Ÿšซ

Can anybody suggest a story that has a similar plot to ''The Private''?

BlinkReader ๐Ÿšซ

Simmilar 100% not, but if you want good SF here - read Green Dragon works: https://storiesonline.net/a/Green_Dragon

adejun ๐Ÿšซ

Thanks

BlinkReader ๐Ÿšซ

Hmmm,
That brings another question - can any of you recommend another good - but less known SF story /space opera here (on this site)?

Replies:   richardshagrin
richardshagrin ๐Ÿšซ

@BlinkReader

Shadow on the Edge by Aeralyndal

Description: THIS is the story I thought I was submitting under the title "Birth of Shadow" NO EXPLICIT SEX.
Size: 660 KB ( ~ 125,156 words)
Type:
Sex Contents: No Sex
Tags: Science Fiction

Review by barron of ideas [other reviews by barron of ideas]

Reviewed: 2015-05-24

This is VERY good story. It's long and filled with battles but there is a hero with issues and he develops and grows as a person as the story expands. He starts as a private, with some flashbacks to explain his past and ends as a Count on a new planet where he and his family are movers and shakers. Most of the combat involves very large armored Mechs which have lasers, missles, machine guns, and armor in varying amounts. Some can jump and others fly.

I understand it is based on a game some of you have heard of before. The story does not require any familiarity with the game. Its set in interstellar space long after current era. There is so much detail there is no point in trying to give an explanation of what happens in the story. A young man grows up and succeds in his carrer of being a Mech pilot and officer of a mercenary military force. If you like war stories you should be happy with this one.

I am going to give the plot a ten. There are lots of twists and turns and unexpected developments occur with little warning. The technical quality is pretty good, considering the length of the story. I saw a few creative spellings or errors but not enough to throw me out of the story. Lets give it a nine. I try very hard only to give one story a month a ten, and I already used my ten for May, so this is a nine. Six is a C. Seven is a B, Eight is an A. This is an A plus.

Plot: 10 | Technical Quality: 9 | Appeal to Reviewer: 9

Replies:   BlinkReader
BlinkReader ๐Ÿšซ

@richardshagrin

I agree.

Aeralyndal has written another two good stories
- Birth of Shadow (https://storiesonline.net/s/38913/birth-of-shadow)
and
- Lurking in the Shadows (https://storiesonline.net/s/38919/lurking-in-the-shadows)

Al those stories are worth of reading :)

moredrowsy ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Wow. It's a gem to crawl the forums occasionally. Just finished reading The Private. It's amazingly well written all around. adejun, I'm so glad you made this post or I would've never read The Private. I usually avoid too much "action-packed" series as it gets tiring following nonsense action descriptions but The Private was a great read.

I'm gonna try out some of Aeralyndal's stories too. Seems interesting. Unrelated to topic, the halloween one by Aeralyndal seems hilarious.

Actually, anyone have recommendations that's similar to The Private's story mechanics. Doesn't have to be space-opera setting but with similar character backstory, premise, and etc?

Thanks adejun and BlinkReader

Back to Top

 

WARNING! ADULT CONTENT...

Storiesonline is for adult entertainment only. By accessing this site you declare that you are of legal age and that you agree with our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.


Log In