Forum: Author Hangout

* parentheses

Minor nit. Parentheses are generally restricted to non-fiction usage, as no one uses them in speech. You might slip them into the narrative, but you should absolutely refrain from using them in dialogue. Otherwise you get the following dialogue:

"Let me introduce my--open parentheses--significant other--close parentheses."

As you can see, the whole premise sounds (and reads) badly.

You put em-dashes on both sides of the aside.

I was returning to the cabin when—did I mention we all moved into the cabin?—I heard an unexpected argument

I'm not sure if you're supposed to capitalize "Did."

Em-dashes are (generally) used in pairs, although it's sometimes optional if the aside occurs at the end of the sentence.

You don't capitalize "did" because it's not a separate sentence, it's merely an aside within the current sentence, which is also why you don't end the sentence in the middle with a question mark. Again, it's a rhetorical question, so the question mark isn't necessary in either case.

Ernest's point is worth considering, as these 'asides' are often merely shortcuts in writing, dumping something you forgot to address earlier into unassociated dialogue, so it's worth reworking the story to avoid it.

Generally, you only use an aside when there's a specific reason for it—such as when it provides a foreshadowing element—or someone is expressing an opinion about the topic of discussion, not when someone is changing the topic entirely.

such as when it provides a foreshadowing element—or someone is expressing an opinion about the topic of discussion,

In plays these types of aside are conversations the actor addresses to the audience and not the other actors. For these I usually have the person think about it to themselves, or have them whisper it to another character. While I work to avoid having to update the reader with information I should have imparted earlier.

In plays these types of aside are conversations the actor addresses to the audience and not the other actors. For these I usually have the person think about it to themselves, or have them whisper it to another character.

I've largely gone in the other direction, having decided that writing someone's thoughts just isn't a natural process and it takes away from the story. You're especially giving people a peek into their mental process, rather than establishing their motivations by showing who they are.

In my case, these asides, while directed at the reader, are in keeping with the characters' natural conversation patterns. Usually, it consists of inside jokes or concerns about upcoming events—which often prove true—though I also provide false leads, so readers won't anticipate which foreshadowing events predict events.

dumping something you forgot to address earlier into unassociated dialogue, so it's worth reworking the story to avoid it

I find it a useful means of introducing a new topic or as a gambit for reopening a prior topic's discussion; said topic to be discussed sometime after the current topic is concluded.

Regarding the capitalising of "Did" - 6.92 of CMOS states:
'Like dashes but unlike commas, parentheses can set off text that has no grammatical relationship to the rest of the sentence.'

What does that mean?

* The contents within the enclosing punctuation marks must make sense, but they may be anything that could be grammatically correct

This means "Did" should be capitalized. That's what I thought.

This means "Did" should be capitalized. That's what I thought.

EDIT doesn't work so I had to create a new post.

I was wrong. Grammar Girl says "did" should NOT be capitalized.

Finally, let's talk about whether you capitalize the first word after a colon or a dash.

A dash doesn't require any extra thought regarding capitalization. You treat the first word after a dash the same way you'd treat it if it followed a comma.

* Unlike parentheses and dashes used in pairs, the interjection may be absolutely anything. There is no requirement for interjections to be grammatically correct.

I still contend, including an 'end of sentence' punctuation, like a period, question or exclamation mark within an aside, is an incorrect usage, regardless of this one exception.

@Switch

I was wrong. Grammar Girl says "did" should NOT be capitalized.

I agree with her view. No matter what a single reference might say, there's no sense violating basic grammar rules within a sentence if you can easily avoid it.

Does it really matter? In real world conversations, asides are frequently stated at the moment they occur to the speaker.

In real world conversations, asides are frequently stated at the moment they occur to the speaker.

And a re usually directed to someone else present as dialogue, not as a narrative to the reader. Thus you could handle it as part of dialogue to someone else in the story.

You are right. I overlooked that it was dialog.

Now let's see narrative is telling about something, dialog is talking. Yep, got it right this time. :)

Okay. Same text, new question. Should the "when" be left before the side comment or moved to after?

The "when" belongs where it is, for the same reason why you should use em-dashes instead of parentheses: it's interrupted speech. In this case, the character is interrupting their own thoughts, demonstrating the chaotic nature of their mind at the time. Em-dashes are specifically designed for interrupted speech, but also do double duty as separators for sentence fragments which aren't directly related to the sentence. In your case, they're doing both, so your only real alternative, if you maintain the current sentence structure, is to use the em-dash (plus, you rarely see the parenthesis in fiction). You'll notice I use them all the time on the forum or in emails, but never in my stories.

@REP

I find it a useful means of introducing a new topic or as a gambit for reopening a prior topic's discussion; said topic to be discussed sometime after the current topic is concluded.

Yep, that's another great use of them. In that case, you're foreshadowing a future conversation between the characters in a natural manner which doesn't seem forced.

One reason the parentheses aren't used in fiction as they're generally interpreted as 'author intervention', the author explaining the story directly to the reader, bypassing the characters. Readers tend (general assertion warning) to see the punctuation as non-native to the speaker.

As my description of the interruption of speech shows, these interruptions can mean very much. Displaying it as an interruption in someone's speech helps to show their mental state, while the parentheses tend to be interrupted (correctly or not) as an external aside by the author himself).

Ernest's method, moving the aside to a private conversation with someone else, works as well, but requires scheduling private moments between the other parties, which often necessitates juggling scenes around--something which isn't always easy to arrange.

Ernest's method, moving the aside to a private conversation with someone else,

The best ways are the ones that work in real life, such as a whispered word while holding back a bit when walking, or a quiet word in a corner or hallway at a noisy party.