@awnlee_jawking
but such egregious use of metaphor reads like a Golden Raspberry entry.
I'm all in favor of raspberries, literal and smashed over part of her body where you can lick them off, or metaphorical. Gabaldon is certainly in favor of metaphor, she makes a point of that, but she also likes pretty straightforward sex.
(I'd lend you my wife's dog-eared copies of her Outlander books, but she'd never let them out of her sight. Let me put it this way: they practically fall open to critical passages.)
This isn't metaphor, although the first one has similes (all quotes from her short piece cited earler):
The road was narrow, and they jostled against one another now and then, blinded between the dark wood and the brilliance of the rising moon. He could hear Jamie's breath, or thought he couldβit seemed part of the soft wind that touched his face. He could smell Jamie, smell the musk of his body, the dried sweat and dust in his clothes, and felt suddenly wolf-like and feral, longing changed to outright hunger.
Also this, which many others have noted:
Where most beginning writers screw up (you should pardon the expression) is in thinking that sex scenes are about sex. A good sex scene is about the exchange of emotions, not bodily fluids. That being so, it can encompass any emotion whatever, from rage or desolation to exultation, tenderness, or surprise.
Lust is not an emotion; it's a one-dimensional hormonal response. Ergo, while you can mention lust in a sex-scene, describing it at any great length is like going on about the pattern of the wall-paper in the bedroom. Worth a quick glance, maybe, but essentially boring.
So how do you show the exchange of emotions? Dialogue, expression, or actionβthat's about the limit of your choices, and of those, dialogue is by far the most flexible and powerful tool a writer has. What people say reveals the essence of their character.
I agree, each to his own.
bb