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What FemDom and MaleDom really mean

Gemini1766 🚫

I tend to disagree with the site's definition of FemDom and MaleDom. The Fem and Male part tell if it is a male or female being dominated, not the other way around. The best way to make this clear is as follows:

Whether it is a man or woman who is dominating a woman, they are in a FemDom situation. Same goes if it is a woman or a man dominating a male, in which case it would be MaleDom.

The other way would mean a longer descriptive would be necessary, like mfm, ffm, mmf for threesomes, but instead would be MaleDomMale, or FemDomMale, or MaleDomFem, or FemDomFem. That just gets too nutty.

Your thoughts?

Replies:   joyR  awnlee jawking  Remus2  LOAnnie
Ernest Bywater 🚫

I've never been part of that scene, but I always thought the gender part related to the gender of the dominant person. I could be wrong, so we should hope someone with experience in that type of behaviour checks in and gives an answer.

Replies:   REP
REP 🚫

@Ernest Bywater

I could be wrong

No you aren't wrong for that is the way the rest of the world defines the terms. The OP just chooses to interpret the terms from a different point of view.

joyR 🚫
Updated:

@Gemini1766

The Fem and Male part tell if it is a male or female being dominated, not the other way around.

In as polite a way as possible. BULLSHIT.

1. Dom is the short form of Dominant.

2. If it were as you claim, it would be dom, lower case.

3. D/s not s/D. The dominant takes priority.

4. Whilst D/s as practised in the western world is not by any means 'original'. It does share a few things in common with the rest of the world, the meaning of MaleDom/FemDom (as translated) is one such commonality.

You are welcome to disagree with the site's definition. You are equally welcome to put on greasepaint, a red nose and big shoes, just don't complain when people call you a clown.

I realise you invited thoughts. In my case these are facts based on a great deal of experience gained in a number of countries worldwide. So not exactly my thoughts. Of course you could be correct, in which case everyone I've met and interacted with (That identified as being D/s) would have been utterly wrong.

awnlee jawking 🚫

@Gemini1766

I tend to disagree with the site's definition of FemDom and MaleDom.

While I have issues with some of this site's definitions, I agree with the management and the two previous responders on this issue - the gender mentioned in the code belongs to the dominant person.

AJ

helmut_meukel 🚫

The problem I see here:
Gemini1766 reviewed a story where he wrote the author used the codes wrongly. In fact the author used the codes as described here on SOL. My question is did Gemini1766's disagreement with the use of the codes influence his scoring of the story?

BTW, I wrote Gemini1766 and informed him the author used the codes according to SOL's code definitions. I guess my message caused his post here.

HM.

Replies:   awnlee jawking
awnlee jawking 🚫

@helmut_meukel

My question is did Gemini1766's disagreement with the use of the codes influence his scoring of the story?

All four reviews are very short, in one case shorter than the story description, and no justification is given for the category scores.

Ideally reviewers should justify their scores, so that potential readers know what to expect.

AJ

richardshagrin 🚫

Perhaps we could make everyone happy with Fem Dom being women dominating women, Male Dom being men dominating men and having opposite sex Dom being Men dominating women and Women dominating men. Three codes instead of two, but it would help people understand which relationships were in the story. Or get rid of both and use D/s. Or tell authors to use BDSM or light BDSM. Instead of limiting authors to 50 or less codes, only have 50 available, and if there are ones that are eliminated, let the author put them in the story description if he or she thinks it is that important.

Remus2 🚫

@Gemini1766

You're over thinking that by a large margin. If a person lacks the intelligence to figure out the intent of the codes, they probably lack the intelligence to read the story.

LOAnnie 🚫

@Gemini1766

Pretty sure by disagreeing with the sites interpretation you're also disagreeing with the community at large. Let's go back to compound words and contractions.

MaleDom(inant)
Fem(ale)Dom(inant)

Choosing to see it the other way comes across to me not dissimilar to the guy who calls himself a lesbian because "he likes women"

Replies:   helmut_meukel
helmut_meukel 🚫

@LOAnnie

Let's go back to compound words and contractions.

MaleDom(inant)
Fem(ale)Dom(inant)

But when it's
MaleDom(ination) = the domination of a male by a female or another male?
Fem(ale)Dom(ination) = the domination of a female by a male or another female?
I think that's Gemini1766's interpretation of the contractions.

HM.

Replies:   Dominions Son  REP
Dominions Son 🚫

@helmut_meukel

I think that's Gemini1766's interpretation of the contractions.

I've done research on websites dedicated to providing resources for people in or looking to join the BDSM community. The way they used maledom and femdom is clearly dom(inant) rather than dom(ination). Completely outside of fiction, based on my research, no one in the BDSM community uses those terms the way the OP claims they should be used.

In point of fact many also use malesub and femsub right along side maledom/femdom. even if you read sub as submission rather than submissive, it's a ridiculous stretch to read malesub as submission to a male rather than submission by a male.

If you read the terms the way Gemini776 suggests, it makes no sense to use both maledom/femdom and malesub/femsub together.

REP 🚫
Updated:

@helmut_meukel

I think that's Gemini1766's interpretation of the contractions

Can you or Gemini1766 provide us with a link to a site that defines those contractions the way Gemini1766 interprets them?

Replies:   Safe_Bet  helmut_meukel
Safe_Bet 🚫

@REP

MaleDom (Pérignon) = A tart liqueur, that occasionally has a creamy finish.

FemDom (Pérignon) = Often has a hint of whine that can be both tight and juicy at the same time.

helmut_meukel 🚫

@REP

Can you or Gemini1766 provide us with a link to a site that defines those contractions the way Gemini1766 interprets them?

I certainly not. I'm totally desinterested in Dom/Sub and BDSM. I read stories with those elements if the story is worth to read and the Dom/Sub or BDSM isn't the main part
of the story.
To determine if the stories are worth reading I read Gemini1766's reviews where he ranted about the misuse of the story codes by the author. So I checked the code descripion given by the site management and wrote Gemini1766 a mail to inform him the author has used the codes correctly.
Gemini1766 then opened this thread.
My answer to LOAnnie's definition was that the contractions
could be interpreted otherwise.

HM.

master2bz 🚫

In both the BDSM community, and on SOL, the codes are abbreviations/contractions.

MaleDom = Male is the Dominant
FemDom = Female is the Dominant

The gender of the submissive is irrelevant.

Gemini776 is wrong, both by SOL site definitions and by common usage. In all my years of interacting with the BDSM community and reading SOL as well as other erotic fiction sites, I have not once ever encountered anyone using those terms in the way Gemini776 does. His "interpretation" exists only in his own mind.

That being said, I would absolutely find it useful for codes indicating what gender was being dominated on top of the existing codes indicating what gender is dominating.

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