Am I the best? no. Am I trying to be? also no.
I forgot to post up yesterday. I got distracted because I had this epiphany for a story and I wrote all seven chapters. It's about a British mum that likes to do naughty dares her sons give her.
I began with a picture of what is an unmistakably British woman. There is something about British women in their body language, carriage and general demeanor that just makes them look "British".
She looks like what I imagine Samantha Fox looks like now, short reddish black hair, big tits, big butt, kind of frumpy. She was trying to ride a bike and her knickers were showing.
The caption was basically "Muh Son dared me to ride his bike up to the petrol station. What chance do I have? I can't even get out of the garden."
I could HEAR that accent in my head and as an anglophile I was sucked into her world. I crafted a story to play with the idea of Her big bottom sticking out under the negligee he chose for her and answer questions like - why did she start doing dares he gave her? Why knickers at all?
I am an American. I don't know how to write proper British accents. I set this in Surrey and had the mum and her sister originally live in the North East. That allowed me to make an excuse why their accents are probably a bit of a mixed bag. I also mentioned that they watch a lot of reality TV like Geordi Shore and naked attraction where they might pick it up.
I picked a small village in Surrey - South Godstone. It's a nothing place really. I wanted to imagine that most of the residents were familiar with her - seen her doing little dares around the village and while it's a bit of a local scandal - she is relatively harmless and most people tolerate her.
The constables up in Godstone proper are well aware of her and when they get a complaint, they assume it's being exaggerated again and they don't drive all the way down there just to tell her to wear a longer skirt.
As I often do when I write though - I began to make the story more than just a funny mum doing little dares. I built some characters and back story. Which I love, but I really was trying to do some mindless stroke writing.
If you like my stuff, you'll probably enjoy it when I start posting up the chapters. I am editing now and the first chapter should be up soon. I've got three others I am working on so I'll cycle them until I get the whole thing posted (7 chapters).
Here is what I ask: If you are English, please, please send me private feedback if you see something that isn't proper.
I researched Vimto soda, and Chip Butties. I researched the local area. I discovered that regionally the meals are very different and went with breakfast, dinner (lunch), tea (3pm) and supper as a standard. However, as I understand it Surrey may be different. It was a massive undertaking to wrap my brain around thinking of dinner as anything but the last meal of the day.
I mentioned pop music like McFly and Pixie Lott on her daughter's wall, did all sorts of stuff to try to make it feel authentic - but I probably got the details wrong. If I do - forgive and help me out with some corrections? what chapter and what I should have said instead?
I am trying to be a better writer, trying to write engaging stuff people enjoy. I can do that with constructive feedback. If not, it's just an echo chamber in here.
The better I get - the better my stories will be.