I am posting up the third chapter of the Goldbergs: Control Anyone Get A Head.
If you haven't read it yet - it is a twist on a mind control story. The mind control is garbage - it doesn't work. Yet, Beverly (The Mom) and Erica (The Sister) are pretending it is to prank him and win a bet with each other.
I've built things up slowly in these first three chapters. I wanted to convey the humor of the Goldbergs (not quite as much as the show) but a little because that is who these characters are.
I find that the entire show is a little implausible on some level. I've tried to capture the feel while balancing it with the "Respect the Reader's Intelligence" approach of making this fun situation/misadventure seem like it could happen under these circumstances.
I find if you jump right in and tell the subjects to start sucking cocks behind dumpsters or walking down the street naked you have no where else to go anyway in a story because they'll already do anything and everything. What I enjoy about the slow build is that the subjects are choosing to do this, and they are finding easier to lose their inhibitions by cajoling each other to continue. They are finding "Okay if topless is acceptable then why not nudity" slippery slope as a premise basically.
I would love if it there was a poll option but I have some questions for you (AFTER you read Chapter 3)
1 - Do you want me to continue or write something else (And why)
2- Is this story plausible to you that it could happen in these circumstances?
3- Right now it is a fun story with flashing/humiliation and probably going to move quickly into light bondage/spanking and the like.
Unlike a lot of my stories that include more involved bondage like cages/whips and chains, gang bangs etc
Would you prefer I continue with the current tone until I reach a place where I feel like the plausibility of what these women will do to win a bet has been reached?
or do you think I should go a little over the top to include a lot of the elements of my past stories?
If you don't have any clue who the Goldsbergs are but want a nice little refresher - try this link
https://youtu.be/n43fM2wdu5A