I've added a foot note to this story. I can't remember when I had so much fun, and so much interest, or hurt my neck dodging the half bricks coming through the screen!!
The other thing I should do is thank everyone - and there were lots of them, at one point my inbox was filling faster than I could answer - who replied to my query about whether orgasm could be a verb as well as a noun. I think originally it was just a noun, but the consensus is that it is also a verb, and proof was provided. So we can carry on having orgasms and enjoying them!
I shall stick to my normal 'romantic' sort of stuff in future.
No, you're not daft enough to believe that are you?