Chapter 1

I fell asleep last night after first going out and staying out very late on a school night. I’m not real sure how I ended up in bed, but I did. My head hurts so badly!

I needed something to wake me up, so I got out of bed and carefully walked to my bathroom. I thought that splashing some Old Spice on my face would help. My logic center wasn’t at its best.

I stripped myself of my boxers and climbed into a really hot shower. I let it run until it was cold, and I finally felt capable of greeting the rest of my family for the day.

I combed my wet hair, shaved and put some clothes on and went down to the kitchen hoping to catch some breakfast.

My mom, dad, and sister, were there. Dad put his hand up, and I was coherent enough to return the high five.

“Good morning honey,” my mother (Jean-45) said. “I heard you come in awfully late last night. How did you sleep?”

“Facedown in my pillow,” I answered.

That made Dad (Joseph-46) laugh much louder and harder than I heard of him a long while.

“Hardy har har,” my sister (Olivia-23) said.

“I’m sorry Liv,” I said. “I can’t look beautiful every day like you do.”

She turned to me and said, “Beautiful. You haven’t called me that in years.” She smiled at me.

“That is strange to hear you call your older sister beautiful. Are you all right, Andrew (Me-17)?” mom asked.

“Since I got up and showered, I am feeling better,” I answered, I think. “Besides Mom, the biggest reason Olivia is so pretty is because you’re so Hot!”

Dad lowered his paper. “Did I hear what you just said?”

“Dad. For a middle-aged man, you look pretty good yourself,” I said.

“Andrew,” he said looking at me closely now. “Exactly, what did you drink last night?”

“Couldn’t tell you. I remember your telling me once ‘Not to mix your liquor.’”

“Yes, I did, but you apparently forgot that last night,” he said raising his newspaper to read.

“I’m sure I had, at least, six different adult beverages last night. Not only that, I had a couple of hot braless babes fall into me. One of them must have been size 44 or bigger. Never saw anything that size before in real life before. Anyway, 44DD fell on me, and her scent was loaded with some perfume fragrance that almost made me hurl.”

“Andrew,” mom remarked, “You not only drank underage, but you were approached by hookers?”

“Mom, they fell over me. The second one ended on my lap, and put my hand on her breast.”

That caused my sister to gasp.

“She wasn’t nearly as hot as you are Liv! Anyway, I picked her up by her breast because I had a drink in my right hand.”

“Would you talk to your son?” mom said to dad.

“Sounds to me like he’s answering all your questions perfectly honest,” dad responded.

I turned away from everyone and gave out a very large belch. I got my bearings again and said... “Shit!”

“What?” my sister said.

“Ask me a question that I would never answer,” I said to her.