Chapter 31

Being a crazy bitch had caught up with me over the weekend. Crazy bitch, drugs, and awful pain equal bad decisions, but once you make it, you have to live with it. I planned to fix it and move forward.

First of all a knife cuts both ways, so I called Joan at school on Monday morning. I needed hard evidence in the form of a video. But I also had to protect myself going forward. So I intended to pretend that things were just fine.

"When I didn't hear from you yesterday I thought you might be angry with me," Joan said.

"No, I'm not at all angry, I just don't want some minor child getting screwed in my house. I know that it's all the craze with you teachers, but I don't plan to lose everything over a piece of ass," I said.

"So what are you saying," Joan asked.

"I'm saying you are still welcome here, but come alone. Well you can always bring Cathy, but no one else. If I'm not enough for you, so be it," I said.

"You are taking all the fun out of it. The danger is part of the fun," she said.

"I do not look good in orange," I explained. "And I have no use for danger in my life."

"Being a teacher in a community college isn't nearly as dangerous as providing security on a deep water drilling rig in the middle of the ocean," she said. "I don't get any release from my job."

Another lie had come back to haunt me. "The job is boring as hell," I informed her. "Anyway I just wanted to let you know you are welcome here, but not with Jose or anyone else. I don't like strangers."

"Okay, but things are a bit complicated now anyway. Jose thinks he loves me," she said.

"Yeah it happens," I said not feeling a bit sorry for her.

"Well if he doesn't have me to fixate on, he will probably go back to fixating on you," she said. "So he is kind of your problem as well. He was stalking you as much as a kid can. His phone is full of pictures of you doing things around your house."

My mind had a hard time processing the information. I ran back over what I had done. I couldn't think of anything damaging that he could have seen from the back of a moped. He lacked the thousands of dollars worth of equipment necessary for any surveillance to have paid off. Still one day I might slip up or he might find a way to follow my truck. After all it was only months before he turned sixteen. He would presumably be driving an automobile by then.

"If that is true, then we do have a problem. If he has pictures of me, then he has them of you as well. Your husband doesn't need to see them and his family doesn't need to see pictures of me. I expect that he has transferred them to the laptop he uses for school. He might have them in some secret file, but they are there nonetheless." I was really thinking out loud.

"He is a good kid Rose. He is out to get laid, not breakup my marriage," Joan said.

"Well that's up to you, but in my opinion screwing a kid is nothing but trouble," I said.

"You aren't going to tell his parents are you?" she asked.

"Why the fuck would I do that. It could only hurt everyone. There is no upside in it for me," I said.

"I know how you feel now and I'm afraid your conscience will get the better of you," she said.

"You keep it out of my house, and we don't have a problem. You might want to tell him to stop the stalking, because if I catch him, I will tell his father about that part of it. And Joan, you might want to tell him that I was in pain and on drugs, or he would never have seen what he saw," I said. "At least that is going to be my excuse, if he tells anyone. I can't deny it, since I expect that he has cell phone pictures of you and me."

"Yes I know he does. But he really started too late to catch your face. His father might recognize you by the sling on your arm," Joan said.

"Yeah, how many woman with their arms in a sling is the kid likely to have access. Well we need to get the phone and clear it. You my dear are in the best position to do that. And Joan I mean clear all his photographs off the phone."

"Okay I might can do that but it won't help if he has sent them to anyone or transferred them somewhere for backing up," she said.

"Gee, now you are getting the picture. There is nothing he can do to me without bringing hell down on himself from his family. They are deeply entwined in my life and he has nothing of me doing anything with him. You however have a job and family to lose. Not to mention criminal charges that could be brought against you. If you want my advice, get rid of the evidence, then get rid of the kid."

The damage was worse than I thought, but Jose didn't realize that the stalking made him look worse than it did me. If worse came to worse, I would just come clean on everything else and threaten to break all ties to his family and have him arrested for invasion of privacy. The cops wouldn't do shit but it might put the fear of god into him. Actually I had just told Joan who couldn't keep her mouth shut it seemed. And I meant that in the worst possible way.

"I will clean his cell phone," she said.

"Try to find out where he posts the pictures. I am sure it is not on his face book account, where his family might stumble on them," I explained. "Joan if you want out, this is your best chance. If you want to lose everything, this is your best chance for that as well."

"Rose, you are scaring me. He is just a horny teenager, isn't he?" she asked.

"Let's hope so. But that stalking and taking pictures could make him something worse," I suggested.

"I will get his phone at the first opportunity," Joan suggested.

"Why don't you just ask him to delete them while you watch. Explain that if he really loves you he will delete them to make you happy. If he does then there is nothing sinister going on. If he refuses, then there might be something to worry about. Either way at least you will know."

"Then next time I see him I will either clean his phone or steal it," Joan said. "I don't want him to think I suspect him of anything.

"Good. Look, I need to get back to bed," I said. It was another lie. My big plan was to take a shower, even though it would fuck up my hair.

"I can't get by to see you for a while, Mark is home now," she said.

"I can find a friend to bring me stuff, and I don't have to give them sex in exchange," I said.

Yes it was bitchy, but I felt that way at that particular moment. Only one good thing came out of my involvement with Joan. If not for her, Jose might have stalked me till he found out something really harmful. Something that could have gotten him killed. Church Camp didn't strike me as the forgiving type. If he compromised them I have no idea what might have happened.

I was pretty sure I could handle him the old fashioned way. A little blackmail might be in order, if he didn't go along with the program.

My ability to compartmentalize kicked in at that point. I went into the shower and struggled with the water. I was in a great deal of pain and I walked leaning forward to take the stress off my ribs. There was too much pain to use the arm. If I didn't try to move it much, there wasn't too much pain in the shoulder.

After my shower I was able to cover my head with a towel and rub with my good arm. It didn't really do much good, because my whole body was damp. It was almost impossible to dry myself completely so I sat by the fire naked. It was nice to feel the heat dry me.

I called Jeremy and Alice. "Hello," Alice said.

"Alice, I was wondering if I could take you and Jeremy to lunch. You guys have been so good to me, I really would like to do something for you," I suggested.

"Are you getting tired of frozen food?" she asked.

"Yes that too," I replied.

"Hold on I will ask Jeremy," Alice said. She was away from the phone for just a minute, "Okay we will come get you in an hour."

"No pick a place and I'll meet you," I said.

"Should you be driving," she asked.

"Sure why not, the drugs don't make me too stupid," I said with a laugh.

"Okay, I like 'Anna's Secret Garden'," she said.

"Hell, that sounds like the name of a sex club," I said.

"No that is Alice's Secret Garden," she said. "So you know where Anna's is located."

"No I never heard of it," I said.

"Go past the plaza under the highway overpass about half a mile and it will be on the right," she said. "Can you be there by one?"

"I think so," I replied. "I'll be the one with the red sling on her arm."

"I thought it was blue," Alice said.

"It is, I was only kidding. I don't think there will be two women with slings," I said

"Oh I see," Alice said.

It was things like that which made me wonder if Alice didn't have a couple of loose screws. Maybe she just hadn't been well socialized, I thought.

"So I'll see you there at one," I said.

After I broke the connection I checked my money clip and found that I had close to one hundred dollars in it. Surely that would be enough for three meals, I thought. I was tempted to move the rug and slip into the grease pit, but I could always give the waiter the debit card.

I tried to dress for the lunch date but it was way too painful to do more then find a clean sweatshirt to wear over the clean white tee shirt. Wearing a bra was out of the question, but I did manage panties. Those were not nearly as difficult as the jeans. Buttoning tight jeans could take an hour, I discovered. I was determined not to wear a jogging suit to lunch. Finally I tightened the leather belt over the jeans closure, then worked the button into the jeans. After they were buttoned, I was able to loosen the belt. I was very proud of myself for figuring it out.

The hair and make up was a problem. The makeup because I was forced to hold the bottle in the hand of the broken collarbone. Then just applying the liquid foundation with one hand was a pain. I gave up and opted for just lipstick. I didn't look like a total zombie, even if my eyes were washed out. I could do nothing with my hair so I found a knit toboggan and pulled it on. I tried to stuff my hair under it. That was a total waste of time, so I just let it hang out like one of those pictures of a sixties hippy.

I worked my way into the leather shoes with no laces. They weren't going to be great in the snow so I was going to try to remember to avoid it. I most likely would forget and step into half a foot or more of the wet cold slush at least.