Chapter 39

Randi was sitting on the couch with tears on her cheeks when they re-entered the living room.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I was trying to let you know the level of control you would have. I wasn't saying that I want to do those things or that I've even thought about those things."

"I guess I understand that," Brock said. "Could you tell me more about the role?"

"What do you want to know?" Randi asked.

"How explicit is it?" he wondered.

"I'll never be in less than a bra and panties," Randi stated firmly. "I told Tiffany that and she agreed. She feels the same way."

"I wasn't really talking about nudity," Brock said. "I heard that conversation. I was more wondering if it was, I don't know, hardcore."

"Like am I really going to fuck some dude on set?" Randi asked angrily. "No, God damn it. This is not a fucking porno. Jesus Christ!"

"That's not what I mean either," Brock said calmly. "Meredith said there are punishments handed down. I mean, is some actor really going to hit you with a riding crop or paddle you?"

"There will be scenes where it appears they do," Randi said. "But it won't really happen. Just like there will be scenes when it appears I'm having oral sex or intercourse but those will be fake too. It's on cable, so there will be nudity. But most of it will be implied nudity."

"I was more worried about someone physically abusing you," Brock said. "I'm not sure I could handle it if someone actually hurt you – even in the name of art."

"It won't happen," Randi assured him.

"OK, that's a good start," he said. "So, what's the worst thing expected of me?"

Meredith and Randi exchanged glances.

"I'll know more after I read the script," Randi said. "But if they stay true to the books, there will be some things you won't like."

"I'm not sure I like any of this," Brock declared.

"Oh, please," Meredith said.

"Bunny, stand in front of your master and masturbate until you cum," Meredith said in a stern voice.

No one moved.

"I said now, God damn it!" Meredith yelled, jumping to her feet, and taking Randi roughly by the arm. "Get your fucking panties off and starting fingering yourself, you little bitch, or I swear to God I will beat you until you can't sit down!"

Brock was about to speak when Meredith and Randi started to laugh.

"See, tell me you won't enjoy blowjobs on demand," Meredith said.

"I won't," Brock said, "if she doesn't want to do it."

"But I will!" Randi said. "That's what I mean. I will want to do it because you want me to. That's actually no different from right this minute. If I had known who Bunny was, I would have immediately jumped up and done as Meredith said – if I was in the role. As Randi, well, I would have told her to lick my twat if she wanted me to cum."

"So this is just for a role?" Brock said. "It's not some deep-seated issue from, uh, well, fine, from your father and from your early life in Hollywood."

Randi considered his question to the point that Brock wondered if she was pissed at him.

"No," she said after reflecting on the question. "No, it's not. You see, that's why I love you. That's why I trust you to help me with this. You thought about that. You considered that taking on this part might be detrimental to Randi Darby, not Randi Raver."

"She's who I love," Brock said. "I like Randi Raver but I love Randi Darby. I don't want you to lose either one."

"I won't," Randi promised. "What I think we should do is take one day off a week."

"I think we should take a couple of days off to start with," Meredith interjected. "You don't want to immerse yourself too quickly. We'll do a day or two then take a day or two off to see how it affects us."

"I'll be fine," Randi said confidently.

"You probably will be," Meredith confirmed. "I was talking more about Brock and me. This is going to be just as hard for us as it is for you. We're not trained actors. First off, neither of us ever want to see you treated this way – and neither of us have an urge to treat you as anything but our equal. I think I'm safe in saying that."

"You are," Brock stated.

"So while you're going to one end of the spectrum, Brock and I have to go to the other," Meredith said. "That is going to be just as difficult because it is as much against our personalities as your role will be."

"Yeah," Randi admitted thoughtfully. "I can see that. Sure. Plus we'll have a safe word. When one of us utters it, the acting stops and real life resumes – until everyone is satisfied we're not crossing any boundaries we can't come back from."

Brock nodded.

"You still haven't answered my question," he said.

"Which one?" Randi offered.

"About the worst thing we'll have to do to you," he said.

Randi let out a long breath.

"There are some really rough scenes," she admitted. "I'll probably need to be punished."

"Spanked?" Brock asked.

"To start with," Randi said. "Maybe paddled, possibly slapped."

"No," Brock said firmly. "I might agree to spanking your behind. Under no circumstances will I do anything past that."

Randi nodded her agreement.

"What about the worst thing?" Meredith said with a pointed look at Randi. "Are you going to mention that?"

"I wasn't because I know how that will turn out," Randi said.

"There is something worse than striking you?" Brock asked incredulously.

"Helga is used as a toilet," Meredith told him.

Brock didn't speak. Instead he simply closed his eyes and let his mouth gape as he took in the implications.

"He pees on her," Randi clarified.

"How in the hell did this book even get published?" Brock asked. "Let me guess. It was some depraved pervert in Hollywood who wrote the fucking thing. It was probably meant as his memoir."

"It was a housewife in Chicago," Meredith said. "A seriously fucked up housewife from Chicago, but a housewife from Chicago."

"Can I safely assume that no one will be pissing on you on the set," Brock asked, real anger dripping from every syllable.

Despite the tension, Randi burst out in laughter.

"Yep, I won't let them spank me but I'll let them pee in my mouth," she said. "Come on, Brock, get real. It's acting. I hope, by the end of our role-playing, if you wanted to piss in my mouth, I'd open up and wait for it. Do I want you to? Hell, no. But I want to get my mind around wanting to. That's what I want you to try to do for me. When I walk onto the set, I want people to think I have been someone's pet since the day I was born. I want to know how to act like that. Right now, I don't have a clue. So I came to the two people I love and trust enough to help me figure it out. That's all."

Brock wasn't certain how he managed to be talked into it but in the end, he simply sighed his agreement.

"OK," he said. "When do you want to start?"

"When we get back from Arizona," Randi said.

Tiffany Wells didn't seem the least bit surprised to find Randi at Brock's house. She dropped a copy of the script for the pilot episode and stayed to chat for a little while. She left just as the car service arrived to take the trio to the airport.

Trying to book commercial tickets for 15 people on the same flight from Los Angeles to Phoenix was a non-starter. After careful consideration, Brock decided to charter a plane. The difference in price was negligible once you factored in the comfort and convenience.

The Gulfstream 550 was waiting on the tarmac at Bob Hope Airport. Bob Hope was much more convenient than LAX because of its proximity to the Beverly Glen neighborhood where Brock lived. The group was the last to arrive and the others were already storing their bags for their three-day trip. There was palpable excitement in the air, which Brock and Meredith noticed immediately.

Randi probably would have noticed, too, if she hadn't been so engrossed in the script she had been given a few minutes earlier. As it was, Meredith finally had to remove it from Randi's fingers to get her out of the car.

"I'll give it back when we're on the plane," Meredith said in a motherly voice when Randi scowled at her. "But I don't want you to trip on the stairs and hurt yourself."

When everyone was settled, Meredith dutifully handed the booklet across the aisle.

"What's she reading?" Jen asked, leaning forward to get a peak.

"Secret," Brock said. "We had to go with second-rate pilots so she's making sure she knows how to land the plane if they forget."

Jen considered him for a moment then gave him the finger.

"A script for a project she's considering," Meredith explained. "She can't let anyone know what it is right now. You'll find out in a couple of days."

"Cool," Jen said, sitting back.

"Why couldn't you have just said that?" Meredith asked.

"What fun is that?" Brock joked. "Do you think Randi will even remember she's supposed to sing tomorrow night?"

"I remember," Randi groused.

"Hey, take it easy," Brock replied. "You haven't spoken a word to us since that was handed to you."

"It's really good," Randi replied, then she returned to her reading.

"Well, I suppose that's as much as we'll hear from her until we hit Phoenix," Brock said.

"I'll keep you company," Meredith said. "In fact, maybe once everyone is occupied, we can join the 'Mile High Club.'"

Brock sort of shrugged and looked away.

"Oh, my God!" Meredith said. "You're already in it. Who?"

Brock shook his head.

"I'll just ask the others," she said firmly. "They'll tell me."

"Tara," Brock whispered. "We took a flight back to California in my last year of college. It was a red-eye and there were only a dozen of us on the plane. We snuck back and did it in the bathroom. It's overrated."

"I'll bet it wouldn't be overrated on this plane," Meredith said, looking around at the opulent interior. "What does a plane like this cost?"

"A lot," Brock said.

"About $70 million," Randi said. "And don't think I can't hear you."

"Yes, Dear," Brock replied.

"That much," Meredith said with a frown. "And here I was thinking this would be a cool thing to own."

"Not hardly," Randi said, setting her script down for a moment. "A lot of people buy them but it's so much cheaper just to lease one when you want to use it. I was going to suggest we do just that for this trip until Brock told me he'd already arranged it. I probably could have gotten someone to let us use a corporate model but that would have required two trips. Those aren't too expensive but the upkeep is what kills you. I looked into one."

"You have entirely too much money for someone your age," Jen put in from the seat behind Brock.

"Yeah, probably," Randi admitted. "Mom said it was a stupid idea but I had some Wall Street guy fly me to New York for his kid's birthday party when I was 15 or so. It was pretty cool and I thought I needed one. Thank God I couldn't do much without her signature. I'd be broke."

"Like me!" Jen said brightly.

"But you're rich in personality," Brock said. "That's more important."

"Says you," Jen rejoined, "because you're rich."

"True," Brock said with a smile. "Very true."

"Gah!" Randi commented. "You two are ridiculous. I'm going back to reading. If anyone actually has something interesting to say, let me know."

She picked up her script and returned to where she left off.

"I've been wondering how they plan to do a series about the sexual exploitation of a child," Brock said in a whisper to Meredith. "I mean, that seems like a bad idea on so many levels."

Meredith did her best to stifle a laugh.

"What?" Brock asked.

"You didn't think that was the whole book, did you?" Meredith asked. "Oh, you did. Well, it's not. The story is set in Berlin in the 1960s. Have you read much about that time?"

"I know about Cold War," Brock said. "I mean I sort of know. I know the city was divided and the Russians controlled half and the United States the other."

"Well, I guess that's a start if it is a little simplistic," Meredith said. "Anyway, Greta uses her job to spy on the Communists and to extort them, I suppose. Helga is really just a small part of the book. I mean, her relationship with Greta and Jurgen is important and so is the role she plays in the plot. They use her to gain information and help smuggle people out of the city. She also is used as an assassin. But Greta is the main character. Jurgen is a side role, I would guess. He's mainly a foil to make sure that Greta doesn't go too far. Helga is what the author uses to show Greta's descent into her dual roles, you know, spy and blackmailer, and her redemption when she helps dissidents escape persecution or death."

"Oh," Brock said. "I guess I misunderstood. I thought the whole book revolved around, I don't know, beating the shit out of a kid or making her do all sorts of fucked up stuff sexually."

"That's part of it," Meredith said. "Greta's frustration and fear manifest themselves into things she forces Helga to do. But Helga is also used to show her human side. She really does care for the girl. She comes to love her, not in a sexual way but almost as her own child. There is a really great section where Greta is looking at Helga's body in a bathtub. For the first time she notices the scars on the girl's body and forces herself to recount how Helga got each one. Helga had never complained about the cigarette burns or the beatings. She accepted them because Greta and Jurgen said she should be doing whatever it was that caused them. That's what Randi was talking about – trying to find a mindset to play that sort of person."