Chapter 1

Sometimes it’s something you do that gets you into trouble. Sometimes you get in trouble for not doing something you should have done. Put your foot down for example, be the adult in the room.

Rob and I met just before the beginning of our junior year of high school when his family moved to our small town. All the girls, myself included, thought he was so hot. More than a few of them were jealous of me when we started dating not long after he moved in. I had quite an advantage, though. His family bought the house next door to mine. I saw him first and since our families quickly became friends I saw him the most.

I had another advantage, too. Rob needed help with a subject I was doing quite well in, French. We spent so much time together it was all but inevitable we’d start dating. It wasn’t love at first sight, though just like all the other girls in school I was infatuated with Rob. I especially liked that he was quiet. It isn’t that he was shy. He seemed to exude confidence. He was popular with the other boys even though, somehow without seeming aloof or arrogant, he always seemed to remain above them. He never seemed to be a part of the sophomoric pranks and immature behavior that typifies males up until the age of ... oh, I don’t know, about a hundred.

I’ve always been kind of quiet myself so I was getting kind of tired of pushy, loudmouth, teenage boys. Rob seemed so much more mature than the other boys, though as I got to know him better I came to realize he isn’t perfect. He has his own insecurities. He’s just very good at keeping them to himself.

He didn’t say much and he wasn’t a swaggering asshole like so many of the other guys. He could have been. He wasn’t a wimp. Not by any means. He was an outstanding athlete. He seemed to excel in every sport. His picture seemed to be on the front page of every issue of the school paper and it wasn’t unusual to see him featured in the city newspaper, either on the sports page or in an article about one of the many civic minded or charitable activities in which he was always taking part.

Rob and I quickly discovered we have a lot in common. The guys all seem to think I’m pretty good looking, too. I was active in several sports and as a result I was in very good shape. My shoulder length natural blonde hair framed my face perfectly. My body had emerged on the other side of puberty in excellent condition. My breasts grew to a firm, pert C cup that the guys found hard to ignore. That bothered me at first. It sometimes seemed as though every male not being led around by a seeing eye dog was staring at my boobs. I was very self-conscious for a while. But as I left puberty behind and grew more confident I found that I enjoyed being admired by the guys as long as they were cool about it. And as I already mentioned, I’ve always been kind of quiet and a bit shy. I thought the two of us made a good couple.

We didn’t go steady, not at first. We both dated other kids off and on throughout most of our junior year. Things didn’t really heat up between us until just before the start of summer vacation between our junior and senior years. We spent nearly all our time together that summer. That was when we started to really fall in love.

That was also when I finally decided I’d held onto my virginity for long enough. It wasn’t a sudden decision. There were a lot of fiery hot make-out sessions leading up to that decision. Please don’t misunderstand. It isn’t as though Rob was pressuring me. I suppose he was as horny as any other teenage boy. But to be honest, I think I was, too.

I was certain I was ready by the time everything seemed to come together at the perfect time and the clothes started coming off. I hadn’t really planned it. I didn’t wake up one morning and say to myself that today is the day. But I’d been anticipating that it wouldn’t be long. I was already taking birth control pills.

Rob turned out to be a very capable lover. He would never say, so I was never certain if he was also a virgin when we first made love. If he wasn’t he was nearly as inexperienced as I was. But with his passionate kisses and his gentle, sensuous touch he kept me in a nearly constant state of arousal. More often than not, when I undressed for bed at night after a date with Rob my panties were soaking wet.

Rob and I might as well have been married through the last few months of our junior year and our entire senior year. We were seldom apart. And once I gave in and we made love for the first time the flood gates were open. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other after that. As far as I was concerned, sex was every bit as good as the rumors made it out to be ... and then some! I was just as apt to instigate something as he was.

I know girls who think sex is “okay.” They can take it or leave it. Or they enjoy it but even so they can take it or leave it, like it’s nice but maybe not worth all the effort or the “disgusting mess.” Not me. From the very beginning, from the time I lost my virginity I loved making love with Rob. There wasn’t much I wasn’t willing to try, either. We were perfect together and proved it as often as we could until we graduated. The fun didn’t stop there. Much to the chagrin of both sets of parent’s we married six weeks after we got out of high school. We had to wait until I turned eighteen because we lived in a backwards state and my parents wouldn’t give their permission for us to marry.

There were a lot of cross words exchanged at my house when my parents found out I was making no effort to attend college but was instead marrying Rob.

Things were tough starting out. We both had a little money saved up. But it wasn’t really enough to start our new life together. We really struggled. My parents and I expected that with some student aid, a few loans and a good shot at a scholarship I’d go to college. I’d saved up some money with that goal in mind. But when the time came I didn’t want to go to college. I wanted to be Mrs. Rob Rogers. It wasn’t just that we didn’t want to wait to get married. I had no desire to struggle to get by for four years when the only thing I knew for certain I could count on when, or if I got a degree in four years was that I would have amassed a huge student loan debt.

Another factor I never shared with anyone was that, although I don’t believe I suffered from a lack of self-esteem, I couldn’t really see myself as a professional, a manager, an executive. I may have been shortsighted but for someone like me I just didn’t think the right path was waiting on tables for four years in order to learn a whole lot of thinks I’ll never need.

Rob, on the other hand, never intended to go to college. He isn’t dumb or anything. Quite the opposite, he’s very intelligent. But he hates school. He did reasonably well, even in French class with help from me. But he did have a problem. Even when I would help him study and he knew the material backwards and forwards he always did poorly on exams. It was as though he would choke up whenever he had to take a test. He said that his mind would suddenly go blank, especially on a pop quiz. So right from the start it was his intention to find a good job and work his way up to middle management in a good company.

We talked about goals almost from the beginning of our relationship. Admittedly ours weren’t very lofty. We knew we’d never be rich. But we didn’t see any reason why we couldn’t live quite well and be happy without trying to set the world on fire.

Our timing sucked. The economy tanked just weeks after graduation. Eight years earlier, America elected a moron for a president because they thought he’d be a nice guy to go out and have a beer with. Unfortunately, half the country still doesn’t see the need for a president with an actual brain.

Despite the high jobless rate in our area we both managed to find jobs. But they weren’t the challenging, well paying, upwardly mobile jobs leading toward careers in middle management we envisioned. I took a minimum wage job with no benefits doing data entry. It turned out to be every bit as exciting as it sounds.

Rob had a stroke of luck when, through the efforts of a friend of an uncle who has some influence in the industry, he was hired on at Porter Electronics and Machine Shop, a local plant producing electronic components and small parts, primarily for the aviation industry. Their business has been skyrocketing thanks to the new aircraft assembly plant that just opened up out by the airport.

Rob isn’t actually qualified for the job. But they hired him, gave him a little on-the-job training and put him on the line.

Between the two of us we were able to afford to rent a small house and with a little careful shopping we furnished it without having to go into debt. We were happy but we weren’t living the highlife.

I suppose I should qualify that last statement. I was happy with Rob and I thought we had the perfect marriage. But I hated my job. It was boring as hell and they treated all of us data entry people like we weren’t quite human. The coffee maker got more respect than we did. Not a lot of time passed before I started wishing I’d put marriage on hold and gone to college first. My conscience bothered me for harboring those thoughts but the life we were living was no one’s dream.

And then it got worse. After only four months there were layoffs where I work. I was one of the first to be let go since I was one of the last to be hired. After that we had to cut back on our already tight budget even more. We ate a lot of spaghetti, meatloaf, and any one of a hundred simple meals I learned to make from macaroni. Even basic cable was unaffordable, as was internet access. We watched only the channels we could pick up with a rabbit ears antenna. We never went out for a meal or a movie. We used the air conditioner only when we absolutely couldn’t stand not to. You get the idea, true poverty.

I spent all my far too abundant free time looking for another job. Anyone who has been unemployed for a while knows how devastating that can be to your self-esteem.

Rob was nearly as unhappy at his job as I was at mine before I was laid off. First of all, it didn’t pay nearly as much as you might expect from a job of that nature. But that wasn’t the worst of it for him. The people are divided up and work in teams of five or six people each at his plant. Rob’s team leader is apparently not the nicest guy to work for. He and the other men on the team all pick on Rob. He gets all the dirtiest jobs and they’re always playing jokes on him or even worse, ignoring him.

I began to notice a change in Rob not long after he started working. His self-confidence, one of the things I admired about him from the very beginning, quickly began to disappear. Something about his job was doing that to him. I was very concerned but I didn’t know what to say to restore his self-confidence.

One day he came home from work and told me he’d been invited to join the guys on his team for their monthly nickel, dime and quarter poker game on Friday night. On the one hand, this would give him a chance to socialize with his teammates and hopefully get on better terms with them. The problem would be carving twenty dollars out of our budget for the buy-in and a few more dollars for refreshments.

I understand the need for him to ingratiate himself with his co-workers. It will make his work life easier and eventually it will, hopefully, make it easier for him to advance. It’s still his goal to eventually work his way up to a management position.

I assured him I understood and we agreed to take twenty-five dollars from what little remains of our savings for the game. The ante was upped, so to speak, when he came home the following evening and informed me that he has good news and bad news. The bad news is that we’ll be hosting the game. I started to panic but he informed me the good news is the men will be supplying all the refreshments. We won’t have to provide anything but a room and a table.

The following evening we put the leaf in our small kitchen table and set out six chairs. Rob’s teammates began showing up just before six and I finally got to meet them all. They struck me as a pretty rough bunch, rude and crude. But they were polite enough when I was in the room. I have to say, though, that some of the remarks I overheard them making about Rob seemed cruel. It isn’t any wonder his self-esteem has suffered from being around those men.

I noticed a change come over Rob as soon as the men began arriving. He seemed to get smaller and less confident. He started to remind me of a shy young boy in the company of grown men. I had to bite my tongue to keep from ordering those men out of my house. I couldn’t stand to see my husband this way!

Josh, the team leader, is a tall, ruggedly handsome man in his early fifties with a pretty high opinion of himself. He gave me the impression he was making an effort to keep his natural arrogance under control, at least until he gets to know me better. He wasn’t very successful. I couldn’t look at his face and not think, “That man’s a prick!”

The men sat down and began to play. I played hostess. I put the case of beer they brought in the refrigerator and poured the snacks they provided into bowls. After that I spent most of my time in the bedroom, only coming out every twenty minutes or so to check on the men.

As the night progressed some of the men got pretty flirty but they kept it clean ... more or less. It was just guys having fun and I wasn’t offended by the sometimes outrageous comments they made. I’d laugh or smile and let their mildly offensive remarks go without responding. I’m still the basically shy girl I was when I was growing up. I guess in some ways I’m still growing up. I’m still a teenager. I only just turned eighteen a few months ago.

The game was scheduled to break up at one in the morning. When I went out to check on them just before midnight the men insisted I join them for a beer. Josh said they feel sorry for me being locked up in my room all evening. It’s obvious from the way they’re behaving and the things they’re saying that they’ve all been drinking beer all evening but I didn’t feel threatened by them.

I much preferred being alone in my room and I’m not very fond of beer but I wanted to seem like a good sport for Rob’s sake so I helped myself to a beer and stood behind my husband while they played cards. I checked his pile of chips to see how he’s doing. He isn’t winning but he doesn’t appear to have lost much either. I was relieved about that.

After a few minutes the guys began to pretty much ignore me. They returned to the conversation I interrupted when I came into the room. Rob was in the middle of telling his co-workers about the hypnotist we saw at the local comedy club about six weeks ago. That was back before I lost my job and we stopped going out altogether. The man and his act were hilarious though I was never totally convinced his subjects were actually in a trance. I suppose it’s possible. We watched them do some pretty silly things on stage, things I couldn’t imagine anyone doing if they weren’t hypnotized.

Unfortunately, Rob couldn’t let it go at that. He got into trouble when he told them he had hypnotized me the next night using the same method used by the hypnotist at the show. Of course no one at the table believed him. They all ganged up on him. They accused him of lying in no uncertain terms and seemed pretty upset about being lied to so of course he immediately became defensive, insisting that I had actually been in a trance.

I held my breath and looked around the table at the faces of his co-workers. It was such a brazen lie and he wasn’t fooling anyone. I stood behind his chair, shocked, confused and fighting down my own growing panic. I suppose he said it because he’s been drinking and he has been trying so hard to impress the men he works with so he’d be accepted. But it struck me as an obvious and totally unnecessary lie and I was embarrassed for him. I tried not to let my emotions show but it’s obvious everyone at the table knew he was lying.

He did try to hypnotize me the evening after we went to the show. And I played along for a little while, letting him think I was in a trance and obeying all his commands. But later, after I removed all my clothes and performed a sexy dance for him while supposedly in a trance, and after we made love, I admitted I was just playing along and I was never really in a trance.

Now he’s flat out lying, apparently in a misguided attempt to impress these men. And worse yet, they seem to be letting him lie himself right into a corner. For some reason everyone seems to be giving the subject a lot more weight than it deserves. It’s just a silly argument. But much to my dismay it is, indeed, turning into an argument.

I kept waiting for Rob to come to his senses and admit to these men that he’s just kidding with them. But he didn’t! He kept right on lying, embellishing as if he thought that by making his story more incredible they would have to accept it as true. I didn’t want to be there. I didn’t want to witness this. I didn’t want to see my husband like this.

It all came to a head when, after Rob dug the hole he was in even deeper by telling them he had even given me a post-hypnotic suggestion so that with a single phrase he could put me back under. Josh became downright belligerent and loudly exclaimed, “Bullshit! I think maybe there’s been a mistake, boy. I don’t want a damn liar working for me. People depend on the work we do. Lives are at stake. I need to be able to trust the people on my team.”

Rob must have known for a while now that he’s gone too far. But now he’s trapped. He knows it and it shows on his face. He glanced back at me and I saw the fear, the desperation and the embarrassment in his eyes. I suppose he knew he’d made a mistake from the time he opened his mouth and told that silly lie to impress his co-workers. But he didn’t know how to back out of it once he got started. To admit it now, though, could quite possibly cost him his job and he’d be labeled as untrustworthy to boot. He feels he has no choice but to stick with his story. He turned to Josh and insisted he’s telling the truth.

No one believed him. It’s plain to see on all their faces. Josh shook his head and said, “Prove it, boy. Say the words. Put her in a trance.”

Everyone is looking at us, looking back and forth between Rob and me. They’re all waiting for Rob to admit he was lying. The damn vultures want to see him get fired right here, right now. It’s plain to see from the expectant looks on their faces.

I’m terrified. If Rob loses this job we’ll have nothing to fall back on. The twenty-five dollars we took out of savings so he could play poker tonight was the majority of our savings. And it would be nearly impossible for him to find another job in this economy, especially when he will almost certainly be fired for some trumped up charge that will look terrible on his record.

I found myself holding my breath, waiting to see our future destroyed right before my eyes in the next few seconds. I certainly wasn’t expecting what happened. Rob turned in his chair. He looked at me with a pleading look in his eyes and in a quavering voice he said, “Green clouds!”

I gaped at him. As a result of my shocked expression I suppose I may have resembled someone slipping into a trance. I know what he wants me to do. He wants me to act as though green clouds is the trigger phrase that puts me in a trance and now I’m supposed to behave the way those people on stage behaved when they were hypnotized.

I don’t know what to do. I mean, I saw those people at the comedy club and the way they acted under hypnosis. But that silly show staged for laughs constitutes my entire fount of knowledge on the subject. So far I’ve done nothing but stand here like a moron and gape. But that seems to be enough to satisfy Rob. He turned to Josh and asked, “Are you satisfied?”

Josh is justifiably skeptical, as are the other men at the table. I don’t blame them. I don’t think there’s any way Rob can pull this off, not even if I do go along!

A long, uncomfortable moment passed before Josh replied, “Hell no! That don’t prove nothing! She’s just standing there! Make her do something!”

Rob is grasping at straws now. He must think he has a chance of pulling this off and saving his job. He didn’t sound quite as scared when he asked, “Like what? What do you want me to make her do?”

Josh thought about it for a moment before he grinned like a dirty old man and said, “It’s gotta be something she wouldn’t do if she wasn’t in a trance. Tell her to show us her tits.”

Hopefully the sound of my shocked gasp was covered by the chorus of encouraging comments from the other men.

Rob wasn’t faking his anger when he exclaimed, “Fuck you! You know better than that!”

Josh chuckled and said, “Okay, okay, calm down, boy. I got another idea. Make her put on her sexiest bikini and be our waitress until the game breaks up.”

I waited for Rob to tell him to go to hell but the words never came. He’s actually thinking about it!

Before he could agree, Josh added, “And I get to pick the bikini.”

Except to close my mouth I haven’t moved or spoken since Rob spoke that stupid phrase a few minutes ago. I’m torn between willing him to refuse Josh’s outrageous demands and praying he’ll accept so we can get this horrible situation over with and get on with our lives. Our future is hanging by a very slender thread.

Chapter 2 »