Desiderata
Chapter 12

Copyright© 2011 by Kaffir

Gerry and Bruno set off immediately after breakfast. It was going to take them a good two hours there and back.

"What's the betting she's got a parking ticket?" chuckled Gerry.

"More than likely. What are you going to do if the car's been towed away?"

"Oh golly! Fingers crossed."

The car had not been towed away but it did have a parking ticket tucked under the windscreen wiper: £60 or £30 if paid within a week.

They drove home. Gerry wondered whether he could plead extenuating circumstances but decided firmly against it. The last thing Isobel needed was publicity. He wondered too what to do about the Honeys. It really depended on whether Isobel was prepared to go into work the following day. On current form she might well in which case she would undoubtedly stick to the bad fall story. If she decided not to go in he would take the day off to be with her. He had plenty of days off in hand and no particularly pressing work to do: certainly nothing he could not catch up with on Tuesday.

They were home by quarter to twelve and Isobel insisted on making them coffee.

"I want to earn my keep, Hermoine."

"Pfft!" She smilingly let her though.

The two of them had spent the morning getting to know each other. Hermoine admitted that she knew of Isobel's fear of commitment.

"Gerry was so down in the dumps that I wormed it out of him," she said. "I hope you don't blame him for disclosing a confidence."

Isobel shook her head. "He was lucky to have someone he could talk to. Penelope wormed it out of me and it was really quite a relief."

"What made you decide to take your own life though?"

Isobel sighed. "I was falling in love with him and I knew he was with me. That's why I put an end to seeing each other. It would not be fair on him if I was constantly worried about the rejection I knew would be inevitable. He would be aware of it and it would become an unbearable burden for him always trying to reassure me. All that added to the inevitability of our breaking up. I knew we were both miserable but I equally knew that we would both get over it in the end. He would find someone even though I wouldn't.

She shook her head. "Then last night we both looked at each other and for an instant I was overjoyed to see him and I could see the same and the love in his eyes and then ... and then I panicked and looked away. We couldn't start again: it was doomed. I ... I managed to get through the rest of dinner and then, as soon as we reached the Honeys' I left. I stopped outside the gate because of the state I was in to try and get myself under control and it all became clear to me." She swallowed and took a deep breath. "I was the cause of both our unhappiness. If I died that would remove the cause. My unhappiness would cease and although Gerry might be very unhappy to start with he would get over it and find himself somebody else. So I decided to go and get it over with there and then. If I'd had some pills at home I'd have used them but I hadn't so I thought that jumping off the cliff would be pretty quick. It ... it was s-so s-selfish of me."

She buried her face in her hands. Hermoine came round the table and put an arm round her shoulder.

"It might appear so now but at the time you were desperately unhappy and in some ways it was a selfless and very brave thing to do."

Isobel looked up at her in disbelief but saw nothing but warmth and affection in her eyes. She laid her head against Hermoine drawing comfort from her as she had done all night from Gerry even though she was asleep. Hermoine held her gently.

After a while Hermoine said softly. "You know you're going to have to tell Gerry all that, don't you?"

Isobel nodded.

"Then what?"

"It's up to him. If he'll have me I'm his. I realised last night that I love him."

"If I know him, he won't push you."

"No."

"So?"

"We'll just see how it develops. I don't think it will take him long to see that I love him."

"And you won't be memorising suitable cliffs in case things go wrong?"

"No!" Isobel shook her head vehemently. "I got shot of that and the commitment business last night."

"Good girl!" Hermoine squeezed her gently. "Now, how about taking the dogs for a walk? The men won't feel like it this afternoon after a couple of pints and a Jays' roast. How's your knee feeling?"

"Not bad but I think I'll go and rub some more of that stuff on it before we go. What should I do about my bed? Strip it?"

"Leave it. I'll deal with it in the morning."

They had a delightful walk. Hermoine lent Isobel a pair of gumboots and her knee gave her little trouble. Isobel was most impressed with the dogs', two Springers, obedience. Hermoine let them do as they pleased but they came immediately she whistled and would walk placidly at heel when told to do so.

"Bruno spent ages training them," she said, "and it really paid off. He never had the time when he was working and our previous dogs were never as well behaved."

"Does he shoot with them?"

"Every Saturday during the season. Henry Everleigh runs the shoot."

"I'd love to have a dog but it's really not on while I'm working. I couldn't leave it at home all day and I doubt they'd allow me to take it to the office. The poor thing wouldn't get nearly enough exercise."

Hermoine grinned. "You'll just have to buck up and get married and rear a bunch of children."

"Then I might not have time for a dog as well."

"Rubbish!"

They beat the men home by quarter of an hour and were having their coffee when they came in. Isobel made a new pot for them.

"Well?" she asked Gerry.

"Success but you owe me two hundred quid for illegal parking."

"What?"

"There was a ticket under the windscreen wiper."

"Not for two hundred quid!"

Gerry nodded solemnly but his eyes were dancing and gave him away.

"Beast! How much?"

"Two hundred. I told you."

"Gerry du Puys, I may have to smack you."

Gerry cowered. "Mercy! Just sixty and thirty if you pay within a week."

"That's more like." She held out her hand. "Give."

Gerry shook his head.

"Please, Gerry. It's all my silly fault."

Gerry shook his head again. "No. It's worth it just to have you still with us."

Isobel bit her lip and said nothing more.

"Why don't you two take yourselves off next door and be comfortable?" suggested Hermoine. "We'll give you a shout when we're ready to go."

 
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