Chapter 19

An hour later, Sawyer was at the desk, engrossed by the terminal. Renee sat with her back against the couch's armrest, one eye on the boy, and the other on the book that rested upon the table.

She wanted it.

-but she knew if she dared open the thing, she'd be caught more deeply than the figure to her right. Anyone would be able to sneak up on her ... as Claude had demonstrated often enough.

Moreover, showing the slightest bit of interest might make them think she enjoyed it. It'd give them one more thing to use against her.

Sawyer hadn't seemed like he was plotting anything- but what did she know? What understanding she held about the average teenager weighed so little, it could be nonexistent. Her life had only taught her about syns, and masters, and her fading memories of the convent gave no insights.

He'd tried to talk while they ate. Tried to converse.

" ... so, um," he glanced at his bowl of noodles. "How long have you been a synthetic?"

"Always," she replied.

"Oh." He paused, then took another bite. "I guess, I mean, how old are you?"

She thought furiously for a moment. "Four months. Or three."

His eyes widened. "Whoa, I thought- well, you don't look super young..."

She busied herself with the apple.

" ... I'm sixteen," he said. "Sixteen and half, actually." He coughed in the silence, then went on. "My mom and dad are on vacation, in case you were wondering. They're going to be back in a day or two, depending. And my sister's at the university." He shrugged. "Do you- er, do synthetics have siblings?"

"They might. I haven't met a lot."

Simon's face swam into focus.

The lump in her throat was not caused by the food.

Damnit.

"But you don't?" he asked.

"No."

The conversation continued its awkward way through dinner. Sawyer never asked any questions of substance, and if he tried, they were easily cast aside by short, non-commital answers he did not pursue.

In the end, he'd seemed grateful it was over. He'd rushed to his terminal. Found an escape from the strange girl in his room.

She'd remained on the couch. Staring at the book.

"Holy crap, Sauce."

Renee flinched as Zack strode in. He did a slow spin, taking in the organized space.

"Jesus," he grinned to his friend. "You're gonna have to let me borrow her sometime to clean my room."

Sawyer glanced at the girl- seeking what, she didn't know- then back to his friend. "Yeah, sure, dude. She's yours, too."

"Awesome." Zack passed the table and landed onto the middle of the couch.

Renee stilled the urge to inch away and tried to remain as still as possible.

"How'd that appointment go?"

"Eh." Sawyer passed her and retrieved two controllers from a box in the corner. He tossed one to his friend. "Doc still thinks nothings going to change. There's a new trial drug out, but-" he shrugged, and settled onto the couch. "-it's pretty much the same as the others."

"My eye," clarified Sawyer, to Renee. He must have seen the question. "You probably noticed." He pushed the hair aside and revealed the silvery thing. "I got the usual mod when I was like, eight. For school. My dad couldn't really afford it, but I didn't want to wear the glasses anymore and he kinda caved after I begged.

"I had the nanos added and all. When I woke up, bam. Couldn't see a thing outta the eye." He chuckled. "My parents really freaked out. I mean, they knew the risks, and they'd signed the waivers- but those chances were really slim, dude. They couldn't have expected it. Turns-"

"Sauce," interrupted Zack."You don't need to give her your goddamn life story. She's just a synthetic. Let's just play."

Sawyer shrugged. "Start the game, then. I can keep talking."

Both of the boys settled back, controllers in hand.

"Anyways," said Sawyer. "It turned out I've got this bizarre disorder that messed up the nanos when they tried to give me screensight. They don't really know why, yet, but it happens to about one out of every hundred thousand people. The nanos go crazy and eat away the optic nerve and those bits, and attach themselves so only their signals go through." Sawyer's thumbs danced on the buttons of the controller, staring straight ahead at nothing.

"Shit," muttered Zack.

"But," continued Sawyer. "the good thing was, the signals do work. I can't see regular things out of that eye anymore, but I can connect to the terminal and stuff." He shrugged. "And that's fine. I still have one good one. I just don't want to deal with the glasses. My mom and dad won't accept it, though, and they keep sending me back to the doc.

"Dude, c'mon," he said. "That's not fair at all."

Zack chuckled. "Not my fault you always go that way."

His friend bit the inside of his cheek, and focused on... nothing, that Renee could see, but he continued clicking furiously upon the controller.

Of course, she realized. They were playing a game and using their eyes' display for a screen. Claude would never have bothered utilizing the technology like that. He probably hadn't considered knowledge of game playing worthwhile.

Renee watched as the two grew slack-jawed, beyond an occasional curse or insult, enmeshed in the game.

They paid no attention to her.

Somehow, she found herself... angered by the neglect. They were the ones who had trapped her, they were the ones that were planning on making her slave away her life- and take away her identity. And both acted like her presence made no difference to their routine, at all.

She found herself seething. If she had been in the hands of another Claude, she could have dealt with it. She would have found a way out, again. At least she would have known where she stood- and so would he.

But these boys thought of her as little more than a slightly advanced robot. Renee ground her teeth together, bitterly aware that lashing out at them would only make her situation worse. Despite the fact that their low assessment could only hasten her escape- she wanted to be doing something, damnit!

"Did you find that program?" asked Zack, startling the girl from her reverie.

"What? Oh..." said Sawyer. He glanced at his friend. "No, dude. It wasn't on any of the usual sites."

"C'mon, Sauce. We need to get it."

"I don't see why-"

"Look at her," cut off his friend. Renee shrank back as three eyes met hers. "She's been glaring at us this whole time. Probably just thinking up ways to try and leave."

Sawyer frowned.

"You are, aren't you, Renee? Do you want to get away?" prodded Zack.

" ... yes." She choked on the word.

"See? She's not going to stop freaking out until you find a way to change her."

"Okay, okay, dude. I'll look some more. Later." He turned away. "Let's play. I got a bunch of homework."

Zack grinned. "You've got a synthetic, dumbass. Make her do it."

Math.

Renee had never had to do homework before. She'd never been schooled before.

It didn't matter.

After they had affirmed that she did, in fact, seem to understand the questions, Sawyer had helped her connect to his file and begin. They were grouped by subject, with most due the next day. She noticed, pursing her lips, that almost all of them had been assigned at least a week previous.