Chapter 58: I can't even pout in peace

I was clueless sometimes. It didn't occur to me until much later, when I was lying on my bed, that Megan might not appreciate me flirting with her cousin. Which was exactly what we were doing. I liked Yolanda, and the attention that I received from the four beauties felt great.

Speaking of.

"Tara, would you see if you can get a tailor in here to fit me for some new clothes? I would like you to also stop at Chandra's and ask her to talk to Megan or Yolanda and see about getting a formal dress or two made. When she is done with that have her come see me."

"Yes, Master," and off she went.

While she was gone, I lightly healed the remaining wounds on my stomach. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought that the wounds were a month old instead of a few days. Contrary to what Chandra had said, I knew that I could be killed. These wounds proved it in no uncertain terms to me.

It was nice to just be able to relax this afternoon and stretch out on the bed with my hands behind my head. Tomorrow or maybe the next day, I would take a trip around the city to get a better feel of it. I was also interested in the bazaar. I had the feeling that it would be fun to experience. I needed to visit to Kassandra's temple and pay my respects too. The priestesses might hate me but it is My Lady's home.

A sharp knock disturbed my reverie. Figuring that it was Chandra I yelled, "Come in."

Megan strode in without even trying to mask her displeasure with me. "What are you playing at?"

"Huh?" I was not exactly eloquent this afternoon. "What did I do this time?"

"You know what you did. What is this duel with Yolanda? and pies? why pies?"

Oh, that. "I was entertaining your brother. I was in storyteller mode and thought that it would be fun to continue teasing the two of you. He seemed to enjoy it." I shrugged and wished that I had kept my shirt on. There was a cool damp breeze that blew across my bed cooling the room and I felt exposed shirtless with her in my bedroom.

"Why her?" Megan was more than steamed. She was furious. My flip answers did nothing more than infuriate her more.

"I like her, she has been nothing besides pleasant and charming to me. Why not her?"

Sometimes, my obliviousness with women knows no bounds.

She just stared at me, the green-eyed monster reared its ugly head and dominated Megan's thinking. Even though she said that I could not have her, didn't mean that I should go looking for another to take her place.

"Oh." What the hell did she expect me to do? "Megan, you are the one that told me that I can't be with you. What would you have me do?"

"Stay away from my cousin," she demanded, more petulant than I had ever heard her before.

"So, what should I say to her? I'm sorry, Yolanda, even if I wanted to I can't see you any more because Megan doesn't want me to?"

"Yes!"

"So, because you don't want to share me, I can't make new friends? or is it something else?"

"Just don't." With that she turned and tried to flee. I wasn't going to let her this time. I beat her to the bedroom door, slamming it before she could reach it. I grabbed her by the shoulder and spun her to face me. Harder than I wanted to but I was not thinking of that. I pushed her into the door and stepped into her so that we were inches apart.

"You can't have it both ways, Megan!" I was steamed at her selfishness and the trap that she had me in. "You tell me that I can't have you and that your father would never see me as a legitimate suitor. I can see that. I hate it, but I can understand it. I respected your wishes and have tried to let you go."

She opened her mouth to refute me and I steamrolled over whatever she about to say,

"It's your turn to listen!" I wasn't thinking any more, just letting my emotions vent. "You gave up the right to tell me who I can and cannot see once you told me that you would not fight your father for me! I still care for you, nothing will change that. Who I see and don't see is no longer your concern. Goddess knows that I wish it were different but it's not!" She was crying openly now and slowly slid down my door.

"I can't," she sobbed.

I knelt facing her. "And I can't hang on to you when there is no hope. It hurts too much. You asked that I let you go the other day, now it is my turn. Please let me go, Megan.

Please."

With an effort she got her breathing and emotions under control. She stood with some effort, even going as far as turning away from my outstretched hand.

She took a great shuddering breath and released it slowly. "Thank you, Charles." She studied my face, burning it into her memory. She went so far as partially raised her hand to cup my face but stopped herself. "Goodbye." Megan opened my bedroom door and walked out of my life again taking what was left of my heart with her.

It didn't hurt as much this time, that isn't to say that it didn't suck. It did.

I stared at the after image that was burned into my brain. I didn't move. I didn't know what to do besides sit down and cry. A twitch in the corner caught my eye, I looked down and saw Tara kneeling in the corner next to the suite entrance, trying to hide.

"Tara, come here." She stood and wearily approached.

She was truly afraid and I wasn't sure why. "Yes, Master?"

I knelt on one knee in front of her making us the same height. "I will not hurt you. OK?"

"Yes, Master." She did not even try to sound convincing.

"For Lady Megan's sake would you please keep what you heard to yourself?"

"Yes, Master. I won't tell." Tara was terrified that I would make sure that she would never be able to tell anyone.

Sigh.

"Do you know who Kassandra is?"

"Yes, Master. She is the warrior goddess."

"You recognized the pendant that I wear correct?"

"Yes, Master." I wish she would stop calling me master. Yes would be more than enough, but I figured that that was something that was a conditioned response.

"I swear upon Kassandra that even if you tell the world the secret that I asked you to keep, I still would not harm you by action or omission." My amulet glowed in response surprising both of us.

"Well, it looks like She accepted my oath. I hope that you will too." Now she just looked at me like I had grown a new head.

Thank you, Bright Lady.

"I would like a book on mining. Would you see if you can find me a few?" That should get her out of my hair for a while. I just wanted to be alone.

I went to sit down and stare out the window but couldn't find a chair that would fit me.

This sucks, all of the chairs were meant for midgets.

I plopped face down on the bed and moped. I didn't even try to convince myself that I was doing anything different. My moping was interrupted by a polite knocking on the door. "Come in."

"You wished to see me, My Lord?" Chandra was practically bouncing.

"Why are you so cheery?" I grumbled into the bed.

"Katra took me to see Lady Yolanda. Lady Yolanda was so nice and talked about dresses and our trip and things. She told me that she would send for her dressmaker to come tomorrow at lunch. We are going to have lunch together tomorrow and that we are going to make an afternoon of it. Doesn't that sound great? I get to wear a real dress and everything. She said that there was going to be a party and everything and that of course I could go.

"You would go too of course, since the party would be in your honor for rescuing Lady Megan. And why are you just laying there? Aren't you excited?"

"Thrilled." I buried my face in the pillow. I was being a boor.

"Why are you so grumpy?"

"Not grumpy," I grumped into my pillow. Belying my previous statement.

"Yes, you are. What happened?"

"Megan."

"I thought that you and she..."

"Not completely. Until this afternoon." I sighed.

"Oh. Sorry."

"Me too. What color?"

"What color, what?" My non sequitur threw her completely.

"Dress, remember? You were telling me that Yolanda was going to have a dress made for you?"

"Red of course. Postulants are only allowed to wear red and white. " That was the first time in days that she behaved like a petulant teen.

"Ah, I had been missing that attitude of yours." She made a face at that. "Go and find the temple. Request the use of their training facilities tomorrow morning from dawn to an hour before lunch. Now, shoo."

"Yes, My Lord."

"Oh and Chandra? You might want to order a bath for tomorrow before lunch. It would not be fun to be fitted for a dress when you are all hot and sweaty." She smiled and thanked me before she left, skipping out the door.

I hadn't even had time to catch my breath before another knock sounded in my door. Where was Tara when I needed her? "Come."